Player Comments on Star wars: A Padawan's Journey

This is one of my favorite CYOAs I've ever done.

Are there links to any follow on storygames?

It's a great starting point, but not much else.

WHY TO SHORT

Definitely a better start than any movie in the sequels!!!
8/8 Definitely recommend!

I really enjoyed it!

coming from the force itself... this is worse than kissing a rancor. refrain from playing this game.

To short

You need to make it longer to make it the most fun it can be. Also if you could add well known person it would make it even better.( And add upgrades)

great story

Make more parts please, make it possible to be a gray Jedi ( a Jed who can have romantic relationships and use force choke and force lightning) please. Very good story so far thank you

Nice for how short it is.

It was just… so short

Good

That was way too short. More will be much better.

Want more!

Very good

That's it?

Great job! I loved it! I would like if it could be a bit longer and have more choices. But other than that it was great!

This makes for an interesting prologue. Significant spelling and grammar mistakes, though.

You should add more

this is good but you don't feel like your there.

I enjoyed this very much I can see potential for this like creating a full app and game or online many people would like this I assume

I loved it I felt like I was really there

It was very fun but pls extend it

This is bad.

it was ok

Great!

It was really enjoy able and gave me some ideas for my star wars fanfic

It is very fun but short

Nice

It could have been interesting, but on my first playthrough it was too short to have any real plot. So a ship's getting attacked and the good guys get their tails handed to them and have to make a break for it. Been there done that a million times, seemingly. There's nothing about who your character is, or exactly when this was, or who your character's master is, etc. Perhaps some of that will be down the other play paths. I'll try it a few more times. I have to say, though, that the game appears to be brimming with spelling errors. That is a major deal killer for me. As a screen reader user, I hear many things the eye might gloss over and I might also miss things the eye catches on. It should be common practice to spellcheck anything you publish, though.

Bravo!

It was sort of good but it could youlse more

Nice lightsaber duel! I’ve been working on a couple of Star Wars choose your own adventure stories for a little while, and I just wanted to look at some already existing ones. This is really cool. You should definitely keep making stories like this one

Great story! Maybe make each one a little longer though?

I thought this was amazing, must have more :D

The game had me on edge knowing that I was the Padawan and I had to do things that some Padawan had to do in The clone wars. this was so cool.

why

It was good although it was short but it's going to have a part 2 so I'm waiting for it

It was fun but I thought it was a bit two short

i love pretty much anything star wars so this is amazing to play. 100/10 stars

Way to short

This was really good, this deserves 5 stars: ??????????

Cool.

Amazing! I died super quickly! AWESOME!

This was great! But it still needs some improvements... I enjoyed it at least.

It was so short! Lasted only a few seconds. Said it was going "to be continued".

BRO! This was AMAZING, can't wait to read your others!

The worst part about it was that there wasnt more of it :P It was fun.

its nice

I truly believe this game wasn't good because it last literally 10 seconds for me to play

I’m rather new this sight. But I found this to be rather well put together if a bit simple. But it’s a prologue and it is coming along good.

add more story. oh ya put a box to add carrectors name

personally, i just think this game has no point whatsoever. all options lead to the same place, and i gave it a 1 rating it deserved... lol. this is totally easy and does not require any tactics at all. its good... if you're a three year old!

I survived :)..but I hoped it would be longer

it was good but I think there should have been more options

It was pretty fun.

Really short, but itherwise great

i love it

please make more

It says choose your own adventure but all paths lead to the same place. Choices are basic and make no change to the story

Well that was short. Imma play it again.

It was interesting but quite short. I am definitely moving to the sequel immediately. :)

Personally, I didn't like it. I mean, it makes zero sense that you are better than your master. If that were the case, WHY IS HE YO MASTER? Not only that, but they must have some serious skills to kick the master's arse THAT fast. So the fact you can't outrun them and the only way you can win is by somehow fending them off is a bit weird. Not trying to criticize, but these are some important things to think of. *There may be an alt ending I didn't see, but I'm pretty sure that the chance of that is slim.*

It's pretty good just wish it was a bit longer. Solid 6/8.

Interesting, good fight scenes. I just it was longer!! Great job!!

Quite short, you should combine all eight into I storybook. Not thrilling, but not bad either.

Very good try to make a much longer version

quite short, but a good first story. the length giives you time to try as many of the alternate options as possible.

quite short, but a good first story. the length giives you time to try as many of the alternate options as possible.

it's decent liked how you got to whoop some sith ass

Would be cool if the paths could branch. As is there seems to be only one correct path. Because it is broken up into segments I can see why it would have to be that way but did it have to be broken into segments?

Short and sweet, a few spelling errors though.

Short and sweet. Great original story!

short but got my heart pumping

It is very good.

it was really good. but is really short

I liked it, but its too short.....

Im liking it but too short

It was ok but too short

Fun but short I am a humongous Star Wars fan

I will start off by simply saying good job. I realize that ,like others said, it was short and simple but, since this is the first part that is to be expected as it is more in the way of a giant hook or a taste of what is to come which really is a great starting base. Overall I think it was well thought out for such a short part and I am definitely going to keep going with this series.

It doesn't suck at all. I just wish it could have gone on longer.

Good start of a game, am looking forward to reading the rest. I think the main problem I have with it is that I really don't like it when story writers put the person's name and then use a colon to show what the person's saying like in a script. Is it really too much work to just write, ""Blah, blah, blah" Somebody said."

Not enough substance though it was good writing.

Seth says MEH!! I dropped a point for it being short. 4/8, good story, I'm looking forward to more.

yay I escaped.

Great story so far besides the occasional misspell. I'll definitely read the rest.

It was alright.

I noticed the occasional spelling error (eg. "ENEMEY FORCES ON THE SHIP!!") and on the first page the link "search for lightsaber" would have read better as "search for your lightsaber", but aside from this the story looked pretty nice.

Some of the choices had deadly consequences that the reader couldn't have anticipated, but considering the circumstances (a lightsaber fight against an unknown enemy) this is quite realistic.

Most importantly, it was entertaining and fun to play. Unfortunately, it was incredibly short. If this was a proper Star Wars episode, this would run for 5-6 minutes max. There was not much context for the story, but I've forgiven that as this is part of a series and your character's objective is probably explained later on.

Look forward to reading more!

Spelling and misuse of present and past tenses aside, it was enjoyable, although quite short. Gave it a 5/8 (too short to warrant anything higher, sorry) and am interested enough to read the rest of the series.

Pretty good, interesting and fun. I'm not a huge Star Wars fan, but I want to read all of your stories now.

My first read of chooseyourstory.com

Although I've read many Choose-Your-Own-Adventure and played D&D & AD&D and read The Dragonlance Series, this is my first experience Back-To-The-Future.

I loved my youth-times and it is always nice to be back there, sometimes.

Nice Part One and I hope that the rest is better and better.

I really Injoyed it Keep them up

The inconsistent tenses (the sith SEE you...they wore dark robes etc.) were a little off-putting, but ignoring that, the story was fine.

5/8

never make a you die link on the first page. Ever!

Too short, is it possible to elaborate on this?

Well written, but with very few options. I enjoyed the writing style, but I wish that there were more paths to follow. Maybe letting him choose to stab his master?

great make part 6,and dont let the hero ever die.we all love him,and besides,his master and jedi girlfriend wouldnt like it.

Meh"..

nice i have seen all the starwars movies and this seems better 6/8

Fun, fast paced, but very short. I am intrigued by the concept of it being a multipart storyline though, so will continue.

Good story. Can't wait to read the others.

Good: I love Star Wars! Loved KOTOR too!

Bad: Too short, I need more Star Wars! Would've been cool to make the lightsabers and force powers items...

Ugly: The Sith ;)

Good first try but it definitely short. However your others get longer and more liked. A few grammar mistakes here and there. Overall, okay. 5/8

Good, but short and linear. Also, Master Shin becomes Shi later. His name needs to stay the same. haha

I gave it a 7 for simularity to Kotor+1
and for good plot+1.
-2 for short story and some weird things. (you use your masters double-bladed lightsaber and your own lightsaber in a fight?) So in total i give it a 5, Still keep working at it and you will make it through.

5/8 good first try.

Good:
1. Plot
2. A bit of nonlinearity
3. Semblance of action options

Bad:
1. What's the point of hints when there were only 2 options? Also, hints should be given before the decision, not after a choice

Ugly:
1. No reason to publish something this short- wait until you have an actual story rather than one scene

Rediculously short. You had a good amount of options, but the length of those storylines came up lacking

+6 for first time -1 points for short length.

For a first try this isn't a bad game. Too bad it's so short. Apart from a few spelling errors, which aren't too bad, it was quite good. But it would be nice if your next story would be al little longer ;)