Dark Nights

a Fan Fiction by Chris113022

Commended by mizal on 7/10/2018 10:15:33 AM

Player Rating5.72/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 36 ratings since 04/27/2018
played 253 times (finished 15)

Story Difficulty3/8

"trek through the forest"

Play Length6/8

"It'll be a while, better grab a Snickers®"

Maturity Level6/8

"I'll need to see some identification"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 16. If this were a movie, it would probably between PG-13 and R.

The Question is back at it again in this sequel to Hard Night!

Gotham City was home to a myriad of vigilantes, and, in your personal opinion, the Huntress was the most interesting of them. So when you hear she's in trouble, of course you decide to give her a helping hand... Things escalate from there.

Second in the Questionable Tales series, a series of fanfiction storygames starring the Question. Featuring the Huntress as a guest star, Batman and the Penguin in cameos, and mentions of other Batman related characters.

Rated for violence, language, and sexual content. I make no claims of quality.

The Question, Huntress, the Batfamily, and all of Batman's villains are copyright DC Comics.

NOTE: An entry into EndMaster's 2018 unofficial romance contest.

Special Thanks to:

Tim36D - Playtesting, proofreading.
The Folks in the Villain Lair - Motivating me to write the story. Even if I didn't make it to 15k in the end.

EDIT 3/14/18: Fixed typos. Completely revamped Penguin's confrontation pages. Removed 'End of *chapter name*, start *chapter name*' links; they're just 'continue' links now. Minor additions to story, including a new page.

EDIT 3/26/18: Fixed some small mistakes that I noticed.

EDIT 4/26/18: Fixed background on title page, due to my usual image hosting site going down.

Player Comments

Your story reads like a comic book, which is both good and bad.

Your page with the illustration was my favorite... It was easy to picture (obviously), but that also made the interaction and dialogue more entertaining. The other pages suffered from a lack of detail (and I found myself wishing there were pictures – although I realize that would require massive effort).

Occasionally the logic of the scene was off (for example, why would a recently-escaped fugitive threaten to call the cops; and, for that matter, why aren’t we arresting him seeing as how he just escaped?... also, why did she take “I didn’t do it” for an answer after all the work to reach the guy she was questioning?).

The action was fun. You have a great knack for entertaining and comic-book-esque choices. They were full/complete actions (rather than just “punch” vs “duck”) that were varied... and there was (usually) a clear logic behind which choice was going to be better (without it being too obvious). There were though probably too many specifically “fight” action choices in a row; so, at some point, I just wanted to skip rather than figure out how I wanted to hit the next bad guy. Maybe some choices around how to hack the computers could be added? Also, some seduction/lust-oriented decisions (like whether or not to peek at the Huntress taking the shower (i.e. you notice a crack in the door)/whether or not to make a pass at her/whether to compliment her personality vs her looks etc.) would have added some more dimension to the types of choices (*spoiler apart from the dance choice, which was unexpected and a nice surprise... but would have preferred that we actually did get to dance... to add another scene with romantic emotion).

*spoiler The twist at the end of the unrequited love scenario was unexpected (and pretty funny as a result). I actually liked that he was so over-the-top spiteful because it gave the main character some internal conflict/dimension (which had been lacking). Probably if there were hints of this sooner (perhaps flares of pre-emptive anger when you are sleeping on the couch? Being angry because she refuses a kiss despite you “having been helping her so much" so "she owes you” at the mid-way point?) it would add nicely to the main character’s depth.

Overall, it was very good. If it had more pictures (or, you spent more time explaining the details of each scene... especially with regards to what I’m seeing, feeling, and thinking at the moments of the most intense drama and emotion), I would rate it higher. Thanks for the fun read!
-- lkiriakos on 4/5/2018 3:01:06 PM with a score of 0
Alright since I'm shooting for 1k words for this review I guess I gotta make this super kawaii to fill in the vast parts.

It's not like I liked this Onii-Chan, but then again it did seemed like you put a lot of work into it so I'll commend you on that baka.

I'm not all to familiar with this type of realistic American anime with this setting since I mainly watch the far more superior Japanese anime, so I'll be playing this with total unbias.

I like the beginning artwork, that was pretty cool ngl, by looking at it I think that this is going to be like some sort of fan fiction between Batman and the dude from watchmen I think? (Oh wait never mind their both two entirely different characters (oopsy daisies)

Reading the first page I'm totally guessing that the question is going to some crime fighting and stuff and save the huntress and theyll kiss and get super pregnant at the end.

So it seems she accepts help pretty quickly, probably already head over heels for the man that just broke into her house and already wanting to shag in her bedroom, in which I was disappointed that nothing happened and it was just a lair.

I went with the penguin lead since I don't really know who the other guy is and the penguin seems to be pretty evil and gross.

I decided to play loud since we gotta show this bitch that we mean business, so kicking down his door and tying him up would obviously be the best choice, but then I remembered that's highly illegal and we can't just be all Doug the Bounty Hunter and barge in all rude, so I decided to backtrack and go nice and quiet like a civilized gentlemen.

I decide that it would be best to not take out the goons since that is also highly illegal and I don't want to get charged with assault and battery in case it wasn't penguin. This leads to alpha bitch to compliment me which makes me feel all warm inside as praise from senpai always makes the mood better.

Sad that Penguin wasn't the guy, guess it was that other dude with the italian name. Though this also elicts another praise from Senpai so I guess that it all works out if this is how it continues to go.

Also I like how with the limited wordcount of under 10k, you managed to make this seem a lot bigger with how you spaced out the pages which is also nice, didn't do too much of a infodump in each scene but managed to do enough to continue on with the story while keeping the pages at a good length. Now, back to the story.

I decided to go in and kick ass with her since doing it alone would have been totally boring and doing so brought even more PRAISE :3.

Fuck I'm barely at 500 words, going to take a hentai break.

Ok, where were we?

Ah yes so I confronted this fuck with senpai. though this leads to yet again another false lead and our total bamboozlment.

Then we have yet again even more wicked assault on PI's because their filthy scum.

Then as the lavish party continues, I decide to check out the second floor as I choose random and I got a lead so that's a start.

I sweeped the guards feet like a total beast and uppercutted him like batman.

Back at the party, I see that Senpai is without a dance partner, and if Prank Invasion has taught me anything, is that a quick game of rock paper scissors asking a girl to dance is a sure fire way to get their panties moist and ready for a savage deflowering session.

Now with the both of us in the same apartment, It's now time to take off the abstinence underpants and swoop in like a total Chad. We have butsecks that night I presume.

Finding the people dead leads to a quick change of scene to hitmen, if that was intentional or not i do not know.

I kick him in the crotch with honor,

Then there's the shower scene in where I can only assume that she's tatanlizing my nipples and biting them which leads to such discomfort.

Going full metal gear I decide to choose the path in which we sneak through his mansion like total law abiding citzens and not break to many laws.

After kicking the asses of all the other guards we find ourselves back with the italian.

I thought this was going to be a total Hiroshima siuation with that bomb but I guess it was just a figure of speech.

THEN WE FIND OUT HE'S THE *****

JERRY JERRY JERRY.

So then the story ends with the couple living happily ever after in Hub city as Huntress ditches gothman to poor batman.

Got the good ending with only a few deaths in the begining. Looked through the rest of the endings and though they could have been fleshed out a little bit more, but I liked how you ended with the good ending.

Overall it was a pretty good story that I ejoyed as the pacing was nice for how long it was. It never felt rushed really as it played out nicely. The villan however wasn't really memorable as I can't even remember his name as I keep thinking of, "oh it's the Italian guy."

But for real I thought this was some sort of rorsarch fanfiction until I found out that it was entirely different. Liked the romance as it had it's place and never really felt all out of place.

This story however has sparked a little interest in learning more about this hero since I know nothing about him at all.

So to rephrase to kill the last few amount of required words remaining.

I really liked this story a lot.
-- Digit on 3/16/2018 5:32:16 AM with a score of 0
I must say, this was worth the wait. I'll tell you the good first, then the bad.

One thing I really admire about these stories is the way you write Vic. I know nothing about him, and yet this story gives me a perfect mental image of who he is. You do a really good job of showing me how he thinks, and why he does what he does. Another awesome thing was the choices. When I saw the (SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THE READERS) two choices for which lead to follow, I expected a 'right' and a 'wrong.' Instead, both choices pushed you toward the same ending, while providing insight into the story. It was a good length, and I got more out of it than I expected. You also did a good job explaining the setting, why things happened, and what was currently going on in the story. I was never confused about why the protagonists did something.

Now, the not-so-good. I noticed you got some grammar complaints on techNOIR. These problems are still here. You switched between tenses a few times, and the punctuation concerning quotations was infuriating. When using quotations, only use a comma if what's outside the quotes is a continuation of the quote.
"Give it to me," she said.
"Give it to me." she said.
See the difference? The first sentence has a comma because 'she said' is a continuation of the quote. Luckily, you did a decent job on spelling, so these shortcomings didn't detract from the story.
Some things, however, did. The way the Penguin acted was confusing. I've seen him in comics, in the Gotham TV show, and other forms of media. I think you missed the mark by a bit. He wouldn't immediately be terrified and call Huntress a crazy bitch if he was shot.
That was kind of a chronic problem, actually. Other than Vic and Huntress, the characters didn't seem to have too much character. The goons I can understand, from Vic's perspective they're nothing more than an obstacle. But the crime-lord? Penguin? The (MAJOR SPOILER ALERT) criminal uncle? I didn't get much of a motive there. This may be an unpopular opinion, but I don't really understand the Uncle's motive. The other suspect, the crime lord, was kind of flat. I know as much about him as I do the Question, but I didn't connect with him as a character very much. The last thing, and this is more of a nitpick, is the chapters. When I'm going through the story, and I suddenly see:
End Chapter 1; Start Chapter 2
...it dissociates me from the story. The way I see it, a story like this should immerse me, and that kind of breaks up the story's universe.
All in all, it was a pretty good story. I can see improvement, but you still have room to grow. I'll be waiting for the next installment of this series (there's a next one, right?)
-- ultraoverlord on 3/5/2018 6:56:02 PM with a score of 0
Liked it, pretty fun stuff!
-- Zane on 6/28/2018 12:17:55 AM with a score of 0
Nice
-- corgi213 on 4/7/2018 12:07:55 AM with a score of 0
*pretty good
-- Victim on 4/2/2018 2:46:38 PM with a score of 0
I got the “bad ending”, but I think it was actually pretty goof.
-- Victim on 4/2/2018 1:21:43 PM with a score of 0
Good one
-- Joseph2998 on 3/15/2018 1:22:38 AM with a score of 0
This story is a reflection of pure ****ing intelligence my friend.Lets start at the beginning shall we, the title.’Dark Nights’ which I’m pretty sure is a pun and I love puns there eggsellent.(See I Can Do It Too!)
What was really interesting is how you turned what would be a ordinary detective story with normally 1 Ending into a ‘romantic dc themed contest entry’ with multiple endings and punz.

I mean damn that’s some complex shit, you were extremely smart to put your own unique twist which was........DC!!!
If I being honest DC and superheroes is somewhat new and semi-admirable.
But the real intellect was using a forgetten character, which is smart since you could shape this character into any type of stereotype, which was the ‘doing it for love’ and the ‘turns out your leads were wrong’ cliche.
It was also intriguing since I actually felt close to the huntresses(Not in a weird way) just as expected from a 6/8 length piece.

I enjoyed this like Batman goes to the store and got ham.(More Punz)
Keep up the great work and effort, since you must of done a lot to pull this baby off.7/8(Awesome as **** so keep the ****ing work up, cause this is ****ing amazing)
To many ****’s given :)
-- Mistery on 3/10/2018 2:16:27 AM with a score of 0
this is awesome
-- Malkalack on 3/8/2018 2:35:38 AM with a score of 0
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