The Ballad of the Orchard

Player Rating5.19/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 56 ratings since 12/13/2016
played 426 times (finished 61)

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length4/8

"A well spent lunch break"

Maturity Level2/8

"choking hazard for children under 4"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 6. To compare to the movie rating system, this would be G.

The goddess of an orchard has been alone with only trees for company for the last thousand years. Then one day, a little boy comes to her orchard. There is one true ending, you'll know when you find it because it says "true ending."

Player Comments

This was very heart-wrenching. I must admit that I had some skepticism about a cyoa inspired ballad, but this has certainly exceeded my expectations. There was quite a bit of strong imagery involved, and you did well in painting a picture with your words.

I think that the length was fine in getting it's point across, as I couldn't help but feel a bit emotional towards the end, but getting the true end did help in making this a bit more bittersweet :)

This poem is definitely one of my favorites that I have had the pleasure of reading on this site. I wouldn't mind reading more content from you, be it another ballad, or a storygame.
-- TharaApples on 12/13/2016 8:24:40 PM
This certainly brings my ballad to shame.

It's very poetic, very beautiful, very heart-wrenching, has very good imagery at the right places, and contains a lovely message (I felt like there was one, but I don't know if that was your intention). The rhymes are very good, and the lines ran smoothly in my mind and from my mouth.

My only suggestion is to include parahymes to show conflict or whatever dissonance there is through form, though honestly I like it better with normal rhymes.

This is so much better than many of the storygames here, as well as most of the poems I've ever read. This is a wonderful CYOA ballad!
-- Crescentstar on 12/13/2016 4:53:16 PM
I thoroughly enjoyed this. Well done! 5/8
I got the true ending.
-- SonicTurboTurtle on 3/18/2017 1:24:48 AM
Got the true ending on my second try. I only tried to get his love in the end because the last stanza there suggested that doing otherwise would be because I felt he was too old for me to love, which isn't true.
-- The Ghost on 1/4/2017 11:17:00 PM
Damn, this is great! It made me really sad for the goddess.
But the ending made up for that!:)
Great story1
-- Riversage on 12/29/2016 8:55:06 AM
It's so well written, so beautiful! A true 8/8. I played to find every ending.
-- Lifina on 12/18/2016 4:46:50 PM
Amazing!
-- Mage on 12/13/2016 5:06:32 PM
It's such a beautiful story!(I almost cried tbh) I love your entry. Great work!!
-- Blazewhisker on 12/13/2016 10:06:36 AM
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