The last day in the museum

Player Rating2.67/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 54 ratings since
played times (finished )

Story Difficulty3/8

"trek through the forest"

Play Length3/8

"A nice jog down the driveway"

Maturity Level2/8

"choking hazard for children under 4"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 6. To compare to the movie rating system, this would be G.

You are a museum guard one day before retirement and you are giving your farewell to the museum that you were protecting for twenty five years. Sadly there is no money to keep the museum running and so it is going to be closed. But the museum holds works of art far more expensive then anyone things. And you may find this out the hard way or not at all...This is my first game so...technical difficulties may occur. Also english is not my first language.

Player Comments

So was the point of the story simply a tour through the museum? In that case, you'll NEED more description. Because there is no plot or purpose (except guard), and after three or so clicks you can die, the storygame is pointless unless it's to entertain with a tour. Even in this case, readers still prefer a stimulating plotline and action over facts (which in THAT case would cause this storygame to be put into "Edutainment").

Otherwise, please make some sort of plot. There should be an inciting moment and climax and a reasonable resolution at the right times. Spend more time with descriptions.

Work on your punctuation and grammar. Those mistakes caught me off guard.

Overall, you have a nice idea, but you didn't execute it very well.
-- Crescentstar on 12/8/2016 10:40:38 PM with a score of 0
There was a good variety in the options but the wold story was only about 3 pages long. It is better to have a few story branches than a lot that ends the story fast, also as others have mentioned the writing needs some work. You need to develop a plot beyond the basic to make a good story, the more time you spend on a story the better it will be :)
-- Will11 on 3/14/2015 4:51:37 AM with a score of 0
I died after just two clicks. :(
-- Kate on 5/21/2016 6:21:40 PM with a score of 0
2/8
Why?-IDK, errors mainly, I guess I was just hoping for more.
-- DeathIncarnate on 8/31/2015 7:10:57 PM with a score of 0
It sucked for me every time is picked one thing died picked another died I don't think it wants to cooperate with me.
I'm not trying to be mean but don't make us die everytime.
X_X
GOOD
-- Kitkatkate10 on 4/7/2015 7:15:36 AM with a score of 0
It was a very bad, and the grammar was terrible. But, it wasn't the worst story in the world, so you get a 2/8.
-- lollolol on 3/14/2015 3:56:50 AM with a score of 0
I can just bet that your 'English is not my first language' thing is false. IF you even said that, I can say that you can make it better. Sorry, but bad try.

1/8
-- WarriorCatsRPStories on 3/13/2015 11:31:16 PM with a score of 0
The grammar was terrible, and some words were misspelt. This could have been a good, fun story, but was ruined by grammar and spelling mistakes.

2/8
-- Chris113022 on 3/13/2015 10:57:30 PM with a score of 0
Show All Comments