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I wrote another poem.

5 months ago
@Gower
Gower told me to rewrite the acrostic I wrote without the acrostic bit, so I had a little something, turned on XXX and started writing. Tell me what I could improve please, and rate the poem.

A draught of numbness
That brings me pain
She says my concerns are inane
But I don't think it's just dumbness
She uses the bottle as a cane
But it's made of broken glass
She's leaning too much
She'll slice in half
It's a draught of numbness
That brings me pain
I wish I could stop caring
But she's attached like a chain
And her vice is the ball
I drag them around
But somethings gonna break
I hope it's me, so she stays safe and sound