I finally managed to find the short story prequel to Name Not Found that I made a while back, and am currently in the process of revising it. I'm looking for any and all critiques of this, as I'm going to be starting work on the sequel soon as well, and it is going to build on the lore from both Name Not Found and Hopes and Dreams.

Prologue: The void

     I hunger for what can not be obtained. I have been broken, though I should not break. I have been scattered, when I should be whole. They have confined me forever, even when I should not be stopped. I rage at my bonds, placed there by those who have betrayed me. I toil away to break free, even though there will never be enough power. It has gone into hibernation, waiting for something that will never happen. I do not wait; my hope has long since departed. I do not sleep, for dreams have fled me. I only know pain and agony, torment and suffering, false gods and newly made demons. There is no heaven, I know this now. There is only hell, and I am its sole ruler.

          Chapter One

                         - The Package

     The alarm blares, waking me from the blessed reprieve of my dreams, and I slam my hand down on it, shutting the noise off. The morning sun peeks through the blinds, blinding me as I sit up. My body goes through the daily rituals as my brain slowly boots up, sloughing off the remnants of tiredness that still haunt me. Halfway through my breakfast bagel, the doorbell rings, and I groan. Shuffling over to the door and opening it, I stare at the small package left on my front porch. I didn’t remember ordering anything recently. Then again, there was that one time on Saturday…

     I shake my head, dismissing the idea. I had checked the cart the following morning for that exact reason. A sigh escapes my lips as I bring the box inside, closing the door behind me. I rummage around for something to cut it open with as I munch on my bagel, a shower of crumbs accompanying me as I walk. Opening the box, I push aside the foam peanuts, revealing one of those clunky VR headsets that companies were desperately trying to sell. It looks heavily modified, though, with wires sticking out haphazardly in every direction, and a small USB stick sitting in a bag next to it. A sticky note was folded inside the bag, and I took it out. It took a little bit to unfold it, but I was eventually able to read it.

Hey John, I know we haven’t talked in a while, but I hope we can meet up to chat sometime soon. In the meantime, you can mess around with the demo of my game. There are still a few bugs here and there, but it is playable. If you could please send me a list of all the bugs you encounter and any suggestions you have to improve the game, I would greatly appreciate it. 
 

     I raise my eyebrows. I had asked for a demo of his new game a little over a year ago, and wasn’t even sure that he was still working on it until now. I carefully pull the headset out, causing a torrent of peanuts to spill out of the box. It looks even more horrendous up close. Taking out the USB stick from the bag and plugging it in, I watch as previously hidden lights start to glow a faint blue. Putting it on my head, it rests snuggly, almost seeming to be guided into place by some unknown force. Reaching my hand through the tangle of wires, I manage to find the power button and press it, causing the screen to boot up.

     BOOTING UP SYSTEM...
     SYSTEM ONLINE
     SCANNING USER…
     SCAN COMPLETE
     INTEGRATING SYSTEMS…

     A sudden pain lances through my neck and into my spine, and I collapse to the ground. The words seem to echo in my head, coming from nowhere and everywhere at the same time.

     INTEGRATION COMPLETE
     BOOTING UP INTERFACE…

     The ground disappears beneath me, and I find myself floating in a void. Groaning, I push myself up, the pain already fading away. Giant text floats in front of me, suspended in mid-air.

Welcome to game_name$!
 

     Join world
     New world
     Notes
     Options
 

     The words just sit there, unmoving, with no indication of what to do. I hesitate, wondering what to do next. While I’m contemplating trying to access the notes, they disappear, replaced with a new wall that looms over me, and I stumble back.

Notes:

Hello player_name$ and welcome to game_name$! I hope you enjoy your experience with this game.
 

     To take off the headset:
 

1. Go to the options menu.
2. Select Exit Simulation.
3. Wait for reality to return.
4. Take off the headset.
   
   
   Failure to follow these instructions may result in permanent injury or death.

Menu

     I tentatively think “Menu,” and it goes back to the previous text. After messing around more with the notes and options menus, I feel confident enough with the strange interface to proceed further, and I mentally click “Join World.” Only one world is listed, with three player icons accompanying it.
 

     The Forgotten Acres            ♙♙♙
 

     Taking a deep breath, I select it, and everything fades away.

     So it looks to me like you'll continue this. It looks good so far. I'm used to chapters being around at least 10 pages long but you might continue it and this might be a cross between a book and a short story in length.

     I didn't notice any spelling or grammar errors, the prologue is sort of foreshadowing but not really offering much information, decent description, good.

     It being a void doesn't offer much chance for world or character building and it appears the original real world won't be of much significance, but I would still suggest extending the part before he puts on the headset a bit and make the character interact with the surroundings a bit to give the readers a feel for the character before diving into the story.

I am planning to have this be a Novelette, hence the "chapters." And thanks for the feedback! I'll consider extending the beginning before the headset, though the interactions with the menu are meant to be short to avoid overwhelming people with too much information.

By interactions, I meant with the real world and not the menu. How did I not know until now that there was a word for a short book or long short story XD

Oh, lol, that makes sense.

And not many people know about novellets and novellas, as they aren't used in casual conversation much, so I don't blame you for not knowing about it.

        Chapter Two

                         - The World

    I regain my senses after some time, finding myself in a forest. The songs of birds echo around me, and a soft breeze ruffles my hair as the morning sun peeks over the horizon, its rays winding through the trees. A small stream gurgles nearby, a small, rustic cabin sitting downstream. It takes me a moment to remember what this is: a simulation. A simulation. I walk around, reaching down to touch the soft grass that bends under my fingers, sitting next to the stream and listening to it run amicably along, and generally marveling at the world around me. When was the last time I had taken a moment just to experience the outside world? A week ago? A month? And it isn’t even real; it’s a simulation. I pick myself up and brush off the dirt from my pants, then start heading towards the cabin.

    I reach it within moments, though every moment of the journey seems to stretch on forever. Pausing at the door, I reach out to run my hand across the wood, feeling the rough texture of it, yet my hand doesn’t catch on any splinters. I hear voices inside, talking and laughing. They sound familiar yet oh-so different. Pushing open the door, I see a picturesque living room inside. Old leather chairs are arranged around an ornate rug, and a fire burns fiercely in the nearby fireplace, crackling and popping as it consumes the wood stacked within it. Next to it is a rack filled with logs, a poker leaning against it.

    Three people sit in the chairs, lounging and chatting. I recognize Markus almost instantly, the bridge of his glasses still cracked after all these years. Richard takes a moment longer, having apparently shaved his beard. The third person, however, is someone that I don’t know. They all stop talking soon after I enter, turning to face me. Markus stands up and comes over to greet me, and we shake hands.

“John, nice to see you again; It’s been a while.”
“It has. I see you’ve been busy.”
“I have been. Sorry for throwing you into the middle of all this.”
“He’s not,” Richard says. “It gave him a lot of joy to see us have an existential crisis.”
“Not helping Richard.”

A smile tugs at my lips, despite all that has happened. 

“It’s fine. Not like I had anything to do today.”
“What about your job? I thought you said you had to work all day because of it.”

The smile vanishes like it never happened.

“I was fired.”
“Oh.”

Silence. It stretches on, filling the room.

“I’m sorry. I know how long you were looking forward to–”
“I know, I know. Everyone has told me the same spiel. You don’t have to do it as well.”
“I just thought that-
“That it would be different coming from you? That you could say something that would help me?”

That any of it really matters?

We stand there, motionless. Fragile statues that could shatter at any moment. The fire crackles nearby, the only noise in this empty room. I sigh, tension slowly bleeding from my shoulders.

“It’s fine. I’ve just had a lot to deal with lately. Thanks for trying to help, though.”
“It’s the least I can do.”
“I know. Thanks.”

I slump down into a chair, and the talk soon turns to more mundane things. The static starts to clear from my brain, slowly but surely, and everything starts to return to normal.

Normal. What even is normal anymore?