mizal, The Apprentice Scrivener

Member Since


Last Activity

4/25/2017 9:09 PM

EXP Points


Post Count


Storygame Count


Duel Stats

1 win / 6 losses


Lauded Sage


"Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass." --Anton Chekhov

I'm here on CYS primarily as a reader and reviewer. I have an interest in seeing good stories posted, and bad ones going away, and the site being a place readers can browse to reliably find quality work. I'm also a furry, and my fursona is a kitsune, bird, and cat hybrid, while my scalesona is a dragon with feathered wings! ^_^

I tend to be fairly busy during the week, but if you want general impressions or advice on a story or writing excerpt, feel free to PM me. (If you're new, just fyi getting advice and feedback is one of the things the Writing Workshop on the forums is for as well.)

Otherwise, past experience has taught me that the reason you're looking at my profile right now might be because I hurt your fragile feefees with critical remarks.


Haha I think Mizal has a gift for driving half-crazy members into full-fledged crazy :) - Will11

You made fun of something I am doing. That's not very nice. I want people to be nice. Please be nice. - some retard


Let me explain my approach to reviewing:

I said it just a moment ago, but I know words are hard, so I'll repeat: I'm here primarily as a reader and a reviewer. If I feel the thing I just read wasted my time, my review will reflect that.

A story, to be a story, needs an engaging plot, relatable characters and conflicts for them to overcome in a believable way. A rudimentary idea of pacing and structure and a creative idea or two thrown in the mix wouldn't hurt either! (Spelling, punctuation, grammar and proof reading are a given. Better to not publish at all if you can't even be bothered with that much.)

It's not any reader's job to pat you on the back for only failing to deliver in X or Y number of ways. When I see a story that's not a story, I rate it a one and move on. There are people happy to offer feedback, and you can write all you want for as long as you need, but once you hit that publish button you're throwing your work out into the wild and you'd better be sure it can stand on its own merits.

(Storygames with more focus on the 'game' part are rarer and have slightly different criteria, but they still need enough decent writing to hold them together, and above all need to be entertaining.)


Now, for all you kids just starting out, the Grammarly Handbook is a great resource, and above all I'd recommend you just read more books. Step away from comforting junk food like Warrior Cats a little while and challenge yourself by branching out to other genres, older books, and books above your age level. Whether you like them or don't like them, see if you can look at the author's choices from a meta level and identify why.

Trophies Earned

Earning 100 Points Earning 500 Points Earning 1,000 Points Thorough and consistent writing workshop contributions / excellent commenting.


Now You Gotta Deal With This S***

A tale told in verse. A text from your sister requesting a pick up from a party leads to a night of strangeness.

Inspired by Bucky's ballad contest. Though...I wouldn't call this a ballad. I'm not sure what I'd call it, actually, other than exceedingly stupid, and fun to write.

(Don't pay any attention to the scores, they're just for me to track which endings reviewers get.)

Articles Written

CYS Forum Advice and Etiquette
A modernized guide to the forums. The path to internet popularity and happiness, and a few CYS specific do's and don'ts.

Recent Posts

Nevermind. Can someone just critique my first page on 4/25/2017 5:52:14 PM
Your posts are kind of daunting to read on a 4 inch screen, but as far as the technical aspects go, I'm with Stryker about that first sentence. Most of this is dialogue so it's really only noticeable in the first paragraph, but you really want to watch out for passive language, telling instead of showing, etc. I'd assume you already know this stuff, it's just a matter of identifying it when it crops up in your work and either breaking yourself of the habit or being ruthless when it's time to edit. Reading out loud can help.

Hello..Again on 4/25/2017 11:20:41 AM
Not surprising you've never noticed him, but his story is believable and entirely in character for those of us who have.

Writing Prompts Week #14 on 4/24/2017 5:31:41 PM
Says the guy who didn't write anything.

Writing Prompts Week #14 on 4/24/2017 5:29:55 PM
Nice to see these rolling again, and congrats puddle! But not sure if I'll be able to enter this one or not, I've got limited writing time right now and have to focus on the contest.

Chaos Contest Predictions/Polling Thread on 4/24/2017 11:17:31 AM
Really, it's the only motivation that means anything here. Points are and will continue to be pretty useless so if bragging rights don't do it for you, accounts are all there is.

Chaos Contest on 4/24/2017 11:08:42 AM
@Endmaster I don't want my points back unless the judges like my story more than jep's.

Chaos Contest Predictions/Polling Thread on 4/24/2017 8:25:41 AM
End I'd like to bet 5 points that you'll roll your eyes at this post and then ignore it.

Chaos Contest on 4/23/2017 9:34:07 PM
I mean, probably still better than anything you've managed.

Chaos Contest on 4/23/2017 9:11:12 PM
Well I didn't say they were good words.

Chaos Contest on 4/23/2017 9:04:48 PM
Fuck you I've already written 3000 words. And I can have aliens arrive and butcher everyone any time I feel like it.