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OK there bud, don't worry, you have my attention, no need to make more threads specifically drawing me out. Good girl, sweetheart, now back to trying to figure out how to write or making dragons fuck or something. Now this place only exists for Hamlet jokes, which given that that's what I studied for leaving cert my group chats are full of.

Actually, while we're here, since I don't think this justifies making a whole new thread, I require a proof-reader and second-opinion on a game I'm writing, and any help from you people would legally count as AID to those suffering from Hurricane Ophelia.

I already told you your game had too many adjectives and your response was 'what adjectives?' so I'm not sure this is a good use of anyone's time.

@ISentinelPenguinI already read part of it and would be a good second opinion however.

I didn't show you my game, did I? Well, I might've. I don't exactly remember. Anyway, get back to begging for my attention and bitching about BZ.

It's in sneak peek you dumb faggot.

Ah yes, you constantly prowl profiles as part of some kink thing. Nice.

You mean that dumb, monotonous, edgy choose-your-own creepypasta where nothing matters? The one that goes on long, cliche, desperate, adjective chains every other sentence? The one where you try to escape the spooky, gross, visceral nightmare world made of meat because that's a very original, dark, inherently scary concept?

I think I read some of that one, but it was only in the beginning stages at the time. I didn't get much farther than a fleshy tree monster horror in one passage since there wasn't much more written after that.

I remember Mayana said it sucked and had too many adjectives as well.

Is this what eventually happens when routine skull fuckings become too much? 

e: I'm more concerned if Steve will survive the coming potato storm :c 

Weird, I'm not concerned at all.

Neither is he, but for different reasons.

Because I'm not a little bitch whose scared of something named after the least action-prone character in literature?

One might be tempted to say Mayana copied us but no, Steve's writing really is so bad that a blind child can see it. The sad thing is the horror section is in such poor shape right now that it will probably still do well in comparison.

Yeah, that one. Well I mean, things matter as much as anything else I've written, but other than that, yeah.

No, no they don't matter anywhere as much as anything you've written. The other games at least had some stakes, you were protecting your family from a witch or some shit, or trying to win a bunch of wars, in the nightmare world, you either die and wake up again continuously, or you wake up and it's all just a dream where none of this happened, which makes the game not only toothless but removes the tension needed for it to be anything resembling a horror game and reduces it to edgelord asset tourism.

I never really read past the initial nightmare world section, does it go on forever or do you eventually get some kind of explanation or have something to do about it?

I haven't read it in forever, I was just railroaded into a puzzle and tried to pick my way to the end where everything I'd struggled against was voided anyway.

Like Mass Effect 3?

To be fair, the extended cut removed pretty much all those issues by just not having the relays blow up.

More insulting than that. Like GTA V last July. Or GTA V once they hiked up the price for everything in multiplayer so you'd buy more money. Or GTA V when they made everything a grindfest so actually messing around and rampaging with your friends like you would in an actual GTA multiplayer was something nobody ever got around to doing. Really just GTA V in general.

Worth asking, which puzzle did you feel railroaded into?

This probably isn't the case, since I played the game back when there was only the teeth puzzle, a bunch of death pages, and then you climbed a mountain to wake up being just fine and that was the end.

What? So you weren't railroaded into a puzzle?

Kinda was, considering there wasn't any way around it that wasn't dying and going back, but then again there was really only one path of doing things that didn't end in croaking.

Around what? The mountain?

No, around doing the puzzle. You had to solve the teeth puzzle before leaving and doing anything or you'd just die. Not even in a very tense "you have to try and survive now without the lantern the elephant child gave you" way, you'd just get killed and that was the end of it. A puzzle in a horror game like a CYOA or Adventure Game should always have a path around it, or at least a wrong answer or two that allows you to continue at a cost that'll be revealed later. Take that one adventure game HR Giger worked on. Above all the fucked up imagery, the scariest thing was that you'D irrevocably fucked something along the way and you're gonna lose your progress, enter an unwinnable situation, or otherwise have a bad time. Even if it's just a few pages that make the path you took look like you haven't entirely fucked up before helplessly dying is better than instantly helplessly dying when you try to do anything other than get teeth out of the tree.

I think it's fairly ridiculous to say that a puzzle necessarily has to have more than one answer. I feel being just early on to establish the setting, that's a perfectly reasonable thing to do, and I don't see much issue with it. Seeing as it's the start you haven't been railroaded in I it at all, you've just started off to a puzzle that has one solution, immediately followed by another one that, as you'd like, has more than one solution.

I was only around when there was one. Because everything was either death or "this path is hopeless, you start over now" rather than just being able to explore passively and come back to the puzzle, it felt like I was being forced towards this one solution rather than being around to introduce the world.

Well in regard to the mountain there was always two paths up it, so you're incorrect, you must've just failed to find one. In regards to being able to explore, you could walk all you wanted around before going into the forest, or at the base of the mountain, so I'm not sure what you're complaining about there, and in regard to there being only solution, I feel there's not a problem. Not being able to explore the next stage is a ridiculous thing to complain about. You could explore around the section you were in all you want, you just couldn't leave until you solved the puzzle. As a matter of fact, I feel "Don't try wander off into the dark to the next stage without looking around" seems far more reasonable than whatever it is you're asking for.

Honestly, I feel you're just bitching for the sake of it, as you've a history of doing so. I don't want to come off as a dick who's completely unable to take criticism, but you started off with a huge, bitchy comment that was just blatantly incorrect, and then when I pointed that out, you just kind of clammed up. Your complaint here doesn't even seem reasonable in the slightest, and in regards to the mountain, you've just pretty obviously just missed one of the solutions that lies there.

While I'm more than happy to take criticism, yours just seems you being pissy at me, what with starting with insults backed by the fact you hadn't done more than flick through it and take Mizal's reasonable criticism to mask a bullshit, misunderstood criticism that didn't apply, before switching to focus all your attention on a minor detail to make it look as if you actually ever intended to help rather than just talk shit.

Honestly you'll have to ask Mayana for clarification. The complaints of my own was that at the time of reading, there were no stakes because death was a loop and it was all a dream, and there were a lot of adjectives. I can't really argue to this point because being railroaded was something Mayana brought up that I could get the feel of but not really the exact way she worded it. I remember just wandering around, which just led to a few different death/wake up again pages, and then solving the puzzle and moving on to the ending where you wake up and it's over.

So in total, while not knowing what you were criticizing, you just plagarized someone else's vague criticisms while kinda feeling like you agreed with them, focusing on one that wasn't even accurate, all for what I'll presume is the chance to bitchily insult me like a pissy twat?

Alright then.

No, that's the wrong presumption. You're good at those. I don't remember the exact wording of her criticism precisely because I didn't really agree with it, I just also felt like I was railroaded for different reasons and that she would remember why she was upset back before you added shit and therefore have more to add to the railroad discussion. In my case it was because I encountered death pages rather than the ability to cycle back 'unpunished' for doing things other than mess with the tree bugs. And tbh I don't remember insulting you regarding this at all. I remember being twatty about the first two because it was was glaringly obvious to me and I was concerned that it could have easily been better, being railroaded into the puzzle was a nitpick that I didn't feel very passionate about, it wasn't "clamming up".

Which again would be inaccurate. I don't know what tree bugs you're even talking about, but you easily had the options to explore around, as long as you didn't go for the shmuck bait lighter, try to skip the area or, I think, offer the, in which case yeah, sometimes doing things wrong thing leads to death. Anyhow, it again seems that you stole Mizal's criticism, which would be backed up by the fact it seems that you also took May's seeing as you're quite badly bullshitting about how you came up with it, followed by again, making inaccurate criticisms that didn't apply to the game, but you didn't bother to check if they were in effect?

So really as you didn't check, your intentions clearly weren't to help. Seeing as besides that blatantly wrong criticsm you whined about all you did was call it "dumb" and "monotone" despite the fact you hadn't read it and either made up criticisms or took from far more helpful people.

I can easily deal with helpful criticism. Fuck it, I can deal with it if you insult the shit out of it and criticize it, god knows I do that all the time. But when you come out swinging and insulting, only to point out problems that don't exist in the game that you're saying because "Ugh, I vaguely remember them being there", you're not even successfully insulting the game or myself, you're just proving that you're a whiny bitch, which is sure as shit backed by the past, and now all you can do is backpedal behind 'Umm's and 'Ugh's and try to explain that you were "concerned it could be better" even though you opened with insults that any reasonable person could see where simply there to throw shade (which again, I'm not annoyed at, but you did it so poorly) and weren't accurate in any way.

So quite frankly, grow a pair of balls, which hopefully will actually start your puberty, and if you're going to throw shit, do it, and if you're going to tear the game apart, please go ahead, but at least have the decency to target its actual flaws and stand by your attempt to throw shit rather than backpedalling and whinging about "only trying to help".

You know if you're this bored you could always go and actually finish the story.

You've been working on this one a long, long time compared to your usual, I'm not sure if it's a good sign you can't muster up interest in your own work.

I actually haven't worked on this in ages, I got most of the story done in like a week long space. I just pretty much dropped all my work when summer rolled around as I went to Maga, then I was too busy teaching sailing and drinking aggressively, then college started and that wave of aggressive drinking took over. I only got back to writing like two weeks, maybe three ago, if I'm remembering correctly. Which, given the aggressive drinking, I might not be.

EDIT: Shit, came up with a comeback and I don't give a fuck, I'm saying it anyway. Get around to publishing a real story and I'll try to match your incredilbe rate, Miz.

I'll give you that a lot of my criticisms are outdated, I wasn't aware that you worked on it since or had plans for it as something more than a side project, but I'll be fucked if I let you off accusing me of plagiarizing criticisms when I coined the fucking meme that was "the adjectives game" when the IRC read it. I called it dumb and monotone because that's what it was at the time, and it seemed to me that every other sentence in the introduction and as you move to other areas was interrupted by three-word-long lists of descriptors. I backpedalled behind not remembering clearly, because as I said it was fucking months ago and there's no evidence of it now, because yes, I vaguely remember that problem, but everything I riffed on it about was riffed on because I distinctly remembered the problem. I didn't figure you'd care because that seems to be how you draw breath anyway.

Bullshit, I've brought up in the lair how I've worked on it, so that's a clear lie. The adjectives thing was Mizal's comment, and you only seem to have brought it up when she did. You were enough of a bitch to open with insults and then hide behind the banner of "only trying to help". You only took up the, and your description of the game makes me highly doubt you even played it, seeing as its not only outdated, but flat out incorrect, because the game didn't end at that point. 

So yeah, so far criticism-plagarizing, lying, whiny, backpedaling bitch all seem accurate. You came out swinging without having a clue what you were talking about and stealing other people's insults to mask your own idiocy, quickly ran out and didn't even have the balls to say you were throwing shit and cried "I'm only trying to help!", and now you're trying to act indignant about being the bitch you actually are? Jog on and find another fight to die on.

We all read it at about the same time and he did actually speak up about the adjective plague first although I had it in my notes. (I realize you don't actually care though and are just baiting Sent again since you've been taking part in a perfectly calm discussion on Star Trek elsewhere at the same time.)

A. I'm going to assume you're just trying to defend Sent as is with your constant attempts to defuse our arguments, B. He has a history of lying, C. He has a history of bullshitting criticism which you yourself have admitted to.

Also I'm not baiting him, he came out swinging and I responded civilly until I gave up and decided to point out his patheticness, and I can't stress this enough, I wasn't discussing Star Trek, you nerds were, and I was pointing out how nerdy it is and how TNG is overrated to fuck. Anyhow, I guess it helps to show little old Sent that I'm not as triggered as he hopes.

IDK I'd say Sent is one of several on this site I'd value the writing opinions of over those of Steve 'proofreading is for faggots' 24833. I guess you're free to go with any of these other people clamoring to give you feedback and just ignore him though.

I mean it's true he's also way, way more likeable than you are, sure, but nothing he's said is invalid based on the state of your game at the time we all read it and agreed you really should go back to orcs.

E: oh that's right I'm sorry, I see now you mentioned being distracted by Asian porn right before TNG talk started. So I guess during both discussions you were typing one handed but I do have to admit you're good at multitasking.

I'd tell you to just go write your Bladerunner review already but I know you'll fill it with spoilers like an asshole.

And again, the only time besides this I can remember receiving "criticism" from him, you specifically said he was pulling it out of his ass. So, I don't think that's necessarily true.

Well I mean yeah, an unfinished game does have many problems. That's why I'm finishing the game, and asked for help in the game I'm in the process of writing. Anyhow, the railroad thing is bullshit even in the original game, so really the only criticism I've received is the adjective thing, which I've looked at and will try to amend, but since I got that from you ages ago, him bringing it up off-hand in his backpedalling isn't much.

Why'd you have to point out it was specifically Asian porn though? Why not just people porn?

Pretty racist IMHO.

Not that it's related, but I was watched the new Blade Runner a few hours ago, and there asian influences there got me thinking about what it'd be like if we merged cultures with asian cultures, and...

And you're referring here to the infamous Vomit Rant, which was at least different and entertainingly written, unlike the vast majority of this thread. (And all of your stories.)

Well actually, while the vomit rant was a long and strange rant, at least it was founded in a reasonable view that having two characters vomitting was poor writing, which I've tried to avoid since then. The main reference is how he argued that the twist had no foreshadowing and came out of no where, while in practice, it was incredibly foreshadowed, possibly to a fault.

Oh yeeaah, because I obviously was there and read that, just like you were there and read everything that was said when Mayana brought up and linked to the story the first time. Like I said, I didn't think you'd be so fucking triggered, and like I said, I didn't know or care to remember that you had worked on it since. I had only played it many months ago when you could climb the mountain, wake up, and all of it being a dream was the end point. I criticized based on my experience, I was upset because it had those flaws when I read it. And yes, the adjectives was something we were all on about, but I didn't take it from anyone. In fact, I wrote more shit complaining about adjectives than anyone did. This conversation happened long before this thread, and it was something I presume Mizal meant to evoke by tagging me since this was all mentioned just to bait you anyway, despite the fact that I didn't know anything happened to the game since and my complaints weren't exactly diverse.

So no, I haven't lied once in this thread, and I haven't plagiarized a goddamn thing. I just couldn't be bothered to keep tabs on something I had no reason to believe was about to change in a significant way, and only had my original criticisms to go on.

Well yeah, you were definitely there when I mentioned it at least once, given that I've talked about it extensively the past week and you've definitely been there. Also, I said "Game I'm writing", rather than "Game I wrote ages ago", so that should cement it. And I'm really not triggered, which I feel should be obvious by how curteous my initial response was before I realized you were just shouting shit and crying, because again, I don't even believe you really even played the game through. You claiming you only brought this up to help even though you came out throwing insults without actually checking if your criticism applied is clear proof you've been lying from the get go here, and you're just whining and pissy for whatever reason, because you've done this in the past.

So yeah, you have lied in this thread, you've plagarized some of your criticism with the rest being bullshit you pulled out your ass.

For the past week, I haven't been reading much, considering I was only there and able to read things in the wee hours of the morning for the three days before yesterday, and was struggling to even connect cohesively for the rest of the week before that. If there was a backlog of more than a few one-line posts by Mizal about someone being twatty on the forums again, or something about Mayana or Malkalack disconnecting, reconnecting, or another one of my nicks timing out, I wasn't there to read it before refreshing the page and trying to get back on, or tabbing out and waiting for a conversation/context clues to start before coming back to realize I'd been disconnected again. And no, I guess I didn't check to see, but insulting you wasn't my intention. "Trying" to help implied more effort than I put forth, my mind was on drawing attention to things that needed to be fixed the moment I read it, since those were the ones Mizal brought up when she tagged me. So no, I never lied, my complaint was different to Mayana's, and you wouldn't have started another boring shitstorm trying to call me a bitch and bringing up unrelated arguments if you weren't triggered.

Even trusting that obvious bullshit, which is clearly false, it said "game i'm writing", so I was still clearly writing it, and fuck it, all things considered, it's bullshit to think you assumed I'd just abandoned the game for weeks, missed all the lair chats and didn't bother to see what was going on with the game now.

Anyhow, any random twat can read back and see your intention was clearly your aim, but if I actually have to explain it, the best way to help criticize is not to steal insults from others and posting them along insults after vaguely remembering an unfinished version of a game you don't bother to check up on to see what it's like or if any of those criticisms apply to it.

If you say so, but given that I started this civilly but while you're the one who started this throwing shit for no reason about a game you hadn't played, I feel you're the one who's upset for unknown reasons that I will eventually place.

Where did you say "game I'm writing"?  And yes, it is bullshit to think you'd abandoned the game, but I didn't assume, I just never thought about it. I don't think about you or your things very often, until you're talking to me or someone mentions them to me, so my thoughts on the subject hadn't really changed since then. The game was the subject of my attention for a few minutes, then I ranted about adjectives and moved on, I had no reason to think about it other than then, and I had no reason to think about anything other than that moment Mizal was referencing when I was tagged into the thread.

I didn't steal anyone's insults.

I was low-effort posting for the sake of low-effort posting, the same as just about everyone here.

Since this is a new thread, it's the first post, which you clearly would've seen, given that you responded to it. Anyhow, if it was really on your attention for so little, you wouldn't have so passionately responded like a bitch without knowing what you were talking about. But yeah, so you admit it's bullshit, but then hide behind "I didn't think about it", because you thought enough to think about whether you wanted to respond, to write the response, and then post the response, so yeah, realizing the premise of your response was bullshit either almost certainly happened, or you're a braindead trog.

Sorry, meant to say criticisms. 

Well no, low effort posting wouldn't have been so uselessly insult filled over the fact you're clearly still burthurt over our last interaction, and then continuing to argue when how wrong you were was blatantly pointed out, and after that immediately clamming up about that and switching focus only to argue for quite a while. 

I remember mentioning that the story had only one path, not many choices that didn't lead back or to death. There were a few of them, I remember something about gas masks and the mountain cave. I also only reviewed the first nightmare and based my opinions on that, so I assume things get more fun after that. Basicly, I was talking more about major choices in general than puzzles.

I recall you helped with that, it was appreciated.

The initial nightmare section ends with you waking up, past that other shit goes on in and out of the real world.

Well no, because sections of the game don't take place in the nightmare realm, and involve things pertaining to it. In this, even from the start, your life is at risk, which is pretty much all you need risk-wise, but there's more to it and things actually at risk. Ironically, teeth and toothlessness is a theme of the first night, so that's fun.

Anyhow, I'd ask that rather than be a little bitch, you actually play the game through. Fuck it, don't, just at least make sure what you're saying is in any way accurate. I've never been one for knocking criticism, but your criticism of my shit always tends to be blatantly wrong, like your complaints about that short story I had for whatever contest where you said the twist wasn't lampshaded, where I'd accidentally made it incredibly obvious, or you complaints about this, which just aren't true.

Shit game or not, which I fear it's tending towards the former, you're talking out your ass.

OK but the adjectives are still very real.

Yeah, I reread it, and it's an issue I should but probably won't deal with.

I didn't really mind what I read of the story. It was a little on the linear side at the time, but what little of what was written was still more interesting than the school story you did.

Well yeah but that's a pretty low bar.

Oh cool this is it's own thread now.