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     Many of you know me from my short, sporadic stints on this site. Thinking about the aforementioned, I was wondering why exactly I cannot seem to commit myself to being regularly active. I finally arrived at an answer: I do not feel that I have anything worthwhile to contribute. I have no writing experience and little skill, nor the determination to finish a story longer than a page. I have no idea how mechanic role-plays work. I'm not especially articulate, and even if I was I still would not have much to say; Endmaster and the Penguin effectively cover my style of humor, and Drakilian, Aman and Tanstaafl tend to say what I would in a serious discussion. So, if you are ever wondering 'what happened to that kwism kid, exactly?' It is because I dissapeared to wallow in my own self-pity.

1. Just practice forcing yourself to do things. Don't crank it out or anything, just sit there and look at the screen and make it clear that you won't allow yourself to do ANYTHING except write. Then you'll be fine

2. It's easy. I could kinda-sorta teach you how BHB works after the second day reading it, and I was equally clueless when I opened up the rulebook. Hell, if my memory wasn't shit, I'd be able to walk you through creating a first edition D&D module. I can also teach you how to use FATE!

2.Get the fuck back over here you overmodest fool!

1. But youtube! :P I start scheduling times where I must write a paragraph before I can do anything, been thinking about it for awhile. 

2. I would probably like that, but be warned, my friends tried to teach me D&D - did go so well!

3. Sir, yes sir!

You can't reduce a person's contributions into finite bins and then judge them based on the number of bins that they are superior in. If you take a step back and think about that thought process, I think you'd agree that it's neither viable nor realistic. It's not as if this website needs one person to be funny, one person to give thoughtful opinions, and one person to roleplay. We don't need you to be the best, in order to stick around.

And I don't think that's actually the real reason that your visits are sporadic.

In reality, like everyone else, you have real-life prioriites and everyone takes breaks from the website.

Don't beat yourself up, and kill the self-pity. You don't deserve pity, you deserve a chance to succeed, so give yourself that.

... There really should be a "like" button for posts here.

:)

I second that

Me three. That would be kinda cool.

Um... "BradinDvorak likes this."

Inversely, I'd also like the opposite.

Yeah... xD both would be good.

I would have to agree that there can be more than a finite number of contributions, it is just that I never been the one who finds any use in saying the same thing over and over (English teachers hate how few drafts I make, always have liked revising the original more than retyping it). Its not so much that I don't think I could try those things, I just don't think I create anything meaningful and I hate feeling like I'm just wasting everyone's time.

This is highly relevant to my current interests, actually!

I mean, I don't know you super-personally, I don't think? And it's entirely possible that we've interacted, actually, but I am actually someone who has a REALLY bad memory. I mean, not so bad it affects my daily life, really. But I forget shit, and then my actual IRL friends talk about it, and I'm like... that happened? I was there? Damn.

So. I was not, in fact, wondering about you personally. Sorry!

But! I am a person who is currently really interested in a lot of things about creativity, and how different kinds of creativity might work, and how people -- myself very much included! -- can sincerely want to do interesting creative work. But that sometimes they fail, in various ways, at being able to do that.

I mean... I have also kind of wallowed in self-pity, about being someone who really wants to be creative, but I had kind of concluded that I was actually not a creative person, in any useful way.

And... I think I was wrong, actually. And I think it is a thing that other people can think, and be wrong. And maybe I can help THEM see that it's wrong. And here YOU are, this random person (to me, I mean), who has this feeling!

I would like to talk to you about this, in a way that may or may not be helpful to you. But, if I CAN help you, it will be SUPER helpful to me, actually. And if I can't? Well... hopefully I will manage not to make you feel worse in the process. :/

Because I am very personally aware, of how everyone around you can be encouraging to you. And how that doesn't always help, at all, and I think often it actually makes things worse.

So. That's where I'm coming from. If you are interested in being my test subject, basically, for helping me to Figure Out Creativity... let me know. 

And if not? I hope you find a different way to feel better. Wallowing isn't productive, but... it's often REALLY hard to stop. :/

It's not so much that I feel as if I'm not creative, but that I have no way to channel it, or even evoke it really. I've meet plenty of people with really great ideas, but none of us ever really know how to share them. I feel as if I've just never been told how to do creative things properly, never been taught to draw or to write (creatively anyway). How does one start a story? I've seen hundreds if not thousands of opening lines, most of which do not work, and those that do don't really help because by emulating them it feels too forced. You know what I mean? 

Also, we've had minimal interactions, mostly just #WhiteSail conversations.

Hey Kwizm! Was wondering what happened to you. Good to see you're alive and well (minus the self-pity I guess). 3J's post rings true, but if you're gonna leave anyway I wish you well, man.

Glad somebody was. I intend to stay this time, because for once I can't use school as an excuse (my senior year is going to be a joke, too easy).

Everyone can contribute just by being part of a community, every time you post something or read and rate a story you are making a positive contribution :) For example everything I've written recently would probably give people more pleasure if the paper it was printed on was turned into toilet paper instead so instead I've been reading and rating stories rather than writing. Besides everyone has their own unique perspectives, even if they are similar to other people's occasionally, it doesn't matter. A joke is a joke no matter who tells it :D

Hey, remember me? I use to be OinkmanBAO about two years ago. I just recently came back from... somewhere I prefer not to name. Now I'm back to stalking people like you. :)

Oh, joy? Just what I've always wanted, a stalker! :P I do remember you, welcome back, I guess? :)

One thing that will stick with me is just how comforting and accepting everyone here is, definitely not stereotypical internet forum.

You should have been here two months ago... :P

xD We're recovering.

That is great to hear!!

I do not feel that I have anything worthwhile to contribute. I have no writing experience and little skill, nor the determination to finish a story longer than a page. I have no idea how mechanic role-plays work. I'm not especially articulate, and even if I was I still would not have much to say; Endmaster and the Penguin effectively cover my style of humor, and Drakilian, Aman and Tanstaafl tend to say what I would in a serious discussion.

You do realize that was a LOT 4-5 years ago, right?  Back in the day, End was the only source of comedy we had in our non-taggable, follow-able threads (that used a BUTTON, not a checkbox mind you!), Killa had a mouth to toot some pretty agreeable horns, and the first games we had were the MVM and Neo Continent.

I didn't even make a (scrapped) demo until YEARS later.

I mean, welcome back and all, but we're just about back to full-circle.  You're not missing much, honestly.  (Drak admittedly looks like a fuckboy and his Zionist Aman's a freaking bouncer, I swear associates don't even come here often anyway)