So, quite a few years ago I wanted to write something with a lot of thick imagery and detail, as to emulate the mood of great stories I'd read, but ostensibly I fell short. I wanted to tell a story about a guy in some African grassland, out in the middle of the night, searching for some unspecified object, hoping to add layers of meaning between some decent enough writing (at least as I considered it at the time). It's still up on this site somewhere, I'm sure. haha But I never finished and it really wasn't very good at all, critically looking back haha, and I think it was because I didn't have enough life experience. None of what I was trying to describe was anything I'd actually experienced first-hand or understood very much at all. So, I struggled with unfinished projects, each sort of my thought-baby with a specific twist or gimmick, in story, meaning, or otherwise, that I felt I could complete, but just never did.
At a point when you're really young, perhaps you sort of accept you're a just that kinda person. You know you have good ideas, at least, even if you haven't necessarily spelled it out on paper or showed anyone what you've gone for in a certain piece. But eventually, you start to find that you actually can put some of these things into words and you can create something worth its weight. What it's taken for me to write something that I confidently think is decent, like I mention, is probably life experience. Not even my holding a mature perspective - literally, I've just been to more places and I've assumed quite different responsibilities as an adult. I've dealt with higher highs and lower lows, and this will continue to happen until I'm done here, which will only further enrich the pool of inspiration I draw upon when I write. Also, I've learned to write for myself. My own personal satisfaction. I may think something is clever that someone else doesn't, I may write something with an underlying attitude or meaning that no one ever picks up... But as a writer, that's always going to happen.. you can pretty much expect it to happen.
So, I say this because I don't feel I'm alone here. If you're struggling to write but you feel like something always stops you, writer's block or whatever, or you don't think you're that good so you don't do it often, I'd definitely encourage you to just write anyway and that you do it for yourself. I have a bunch of random lyrics and lines saved in my documents, just sitting there. haha Write when you're inspired to write and write about what inspires you. Don't try to make it bigger than it is for the sake of making it bigger, don't add layers for the sake of adding layers, but do actually test your creativity, at least to the point where you think it best reflects your mood or paints a scene. Hopefully it'll be something you look back on and think "wow, I remember feeling that way" rather than "I thought that was clever, but now I think it's dumb." But yah, just something floating around in mind, figured I'd make a post since this is a writing site and all. haha
