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Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Since I seem to actually be doing this, I thought I'd track my progress here.

40 pages in, the protagonist has gotten up, gotten dressed, eaten breakfast, and had a chance to think about some things. Given  my choice-heavy style, I don't think that's overkill, but I'll be curious to know what people think once I finish the first day and put up a preview.

And yes, it's about a girl who becomes a paladin. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

..... 40 pages in, and you aren't done with the first day? XD Hopefully it will be good. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

And very long...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Wow, that's a lot of pages for just waking up XD

But long is always good, assuming the Author writes well (Which I'm sure you do haha) and it isn't overly boring haha. Hope you can finish it!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Totally bet that the necromancer is her mother juejuejuejue

Why do I get the feeling you're doing this to spite a certain user?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It's not spite, I'm just... balancing the scale. XD

What necromancer? o_O

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Well, storygames are multidimensional, not just long... the shortest path through is only six pages. And my pages aren't exactly Endmaster pages, either. XD

Thanks for the encouragement! ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Page 60. Still morning. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Add a kinky sex scene with a red clothed man possibly named Jihelu.

....

....

He also has to be a demon.

ALl of this is sarcastic.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I'm so tempted to give you a cameo, Jihelu.... So. Tempted. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

So the paladin can brutally slaughter him? :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Yes, I agree to this idea!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

If Jihelu had a proper cameo he would just fade into dust and be like "Fine god damnit" then fuck off sadly ;.;

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Page 65.  Afternoon in the middle of work for you, eh?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

...I'm so confused. Page 65 is the case with the donkey, (although I don't know how you're getting page numbers), which has... what to do with work? o_O

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

lolwut?

I'm just guessing your progress because I assumed you worked on weekends :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Heh, okay, I get it now. But no, I had yesterday off. And it's closer to 80 now. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

You should add that one quest where you go off to wield the sacred war spork and kill the Evil Lord of Plot Importance with it. Y'know, just to prove that it's better than strawberry pudding....

Actually, on second thought, Jihelu's idea was better. Just make sure that sporks are promoted in some way along that path.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No, no sporks! They will ruin the story! 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No sporks, pudding, mustaches, or penguins. I'll leave those to Sentinel. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Day one is complete! Click to play!

...or not. XD Nothing really exciting happens in day one. I'd be curious to know what people think, though. Constructive criticism is welcome. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Yeah, it keeps redirecting me to the storygame thread.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

You need to allow sneak preview reading for us to read it. :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Noooo, what did you do with Killa?!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Whoops, forgot I unchecked that. Try again?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Pretty good actualy, I can't wait for the rest!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Thanks! I'm hoping to finish a day per day, but we'll see! ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I hate it.

There are too many choices! Do you have any idea how torturous this kind of game is to someone who wants to complete every single aspect of a game? I'm one of those people! It would take me hours of re-clicking and mapping out storylines to get everything!

(it's well written though, so there's that. You have a good start going on.)

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Heh. It's not a game for die-hard completionists, for sure. I did say it was choice-heavy. But there are only two big game-affecting choices so far: Are you a believer or an atheist, and do you actually want to become a paladin or not. As currently planned, those combine to provide the four major branches in the future, though they'll necessarily reconverge.

That said, all those little choices do generally add to one or more of the six main variables, "virtue" and the equivalent of Christianity's deadly sins... XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Okay, so in day two you find a coin worth about $50. What do you want to be able to buy? I've got two ideas (a dress, a book) and need a third to round it out.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

A sword to kill people with! :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Worth way more than $50... Maybe a knife, though. Thanks! ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

How about a mysterious object that helps you find magical hidden content?

Magic beans?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

That would require me to write magical hidden content, so... no. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

But... But.... What about a Weaver Boss easter egg?... 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No weavers in the setting. Completely different set of deities. Besides, weavers are at worst lawful evil, they're not the best foes for a paladin. They play better against chaotic types.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

What about a secret octopus boss? Secret dwarf mine? A Secret Demonic Giant Boss fight that has details and such around the dungeon that clear up plot holes? Or how about a secret room with things that break the fourth wall? Can't go wrong with one of those!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Speaking of chaotic types... XD

No secrets. Secrets = more work. ;P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Wait, did you deliberately put us in a loop so we can't see your Day 2?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Nope! Day 2 just has the 'This is a new page' text. What's looping for you? There's a loop around thinking about things (if you skipped that during the morning), but once you hit past, present, & future, you can sleep. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It says "Return Attention To Your Mending" o3o

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Shoot. Um, were you mending, or was it evening?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

So confused, that should be bringing you to the next page...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Apparently, it only works after I think about becoming one of the Mercy :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

But, but, there are no conditions on that link! >_<

Well, I changed it and then changed it back, maybe that'll fix it. :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Mebbe :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It's fixed.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Woot! Thanks. ^_^

Thoughts?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Still trying to figure out what her mother did, to be imprisoned for 10+ years. It's funny, when I write non-interactive projects I plot and outline a bunch, but for this I'm totally pantsing along... XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I bet the Mother strangled her husband to death.

Called it?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

That would certainly do it... o_O

But I'm thinking she's actually not in jail... she committed a (relatively) minor offense, but she either didn't want or wasn't granted custody...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Theft of bread?

Totally not Le Miserables.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Your parole has begun.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Never seen it, actually. But having her be too sympathetic would undermine the premise that Justice is an actual force in this world.

Over 100 pages now, and starting to approach the limit of what I know about the plot. I've at least managed to redirect things into a single path, though I still need to figure out what to do with the atheists. But you can declare your lack of faith and still wind up a paladin candidate, instead of there being a separate parallel thread. Yay railroading. XD

 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Yay indeed. XD 

(though, that sounds remarkably interesting. The Atheist Paladin sounds like an amusing story.)

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

You dont have to believe in a god to crave justice to the point of beating people to death with a giant hammer.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Seeing how a Paladin (in normal literature) gets his/her power from god, it's amusing. Certainly not impossible, but hilarious. 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Human righteousness shall be my god!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

A goddess in this case, but yes. Unlike the original Paladin storygame, I'm definitely not ignoring the religious aspect of the role.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Should be cool, then. (An atheist writing about God(esses)? What tom-foolery is this?)

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Heh, well... some of my favorite fiction has deities in it. The Chalion books. The Deed of Paksenarrion. Sandman. The best of those god-depictions make me wish they were real. I'm obviously not going to come anywhere close to their level, but it's still an interesting thing to write about... despite my personal beliefs about the actual nature of reality.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Well, I wanted to give people as much freedom as I could... but yeah, I think the atheists are going to end up finding out first-hand that they're wrong. It may end up being one of the more interesting paths, though.

Really, I should probably be figuring out what to do with the believers who max out their virtue stat... "You're a good person and then you become a paladin, you win!" is kinda boring. :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Fun fact:
In D&D, when paladins gained full power, they became beacons of their god.

They literally became demi gods basically, using their entire life for their god.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

That's kinda what being a paladin at all means in this setting. I just need to figure what you do after that...

Hm! Okay, that could work! Maybe. Hm...

 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I REMEMBER THE WORD.

Paragon.

You would become a paragon of the god.

So in D&D, your paragon path would literally be "paragon".....awkward.

 

Athiest paladins in theory could just be restoration (If you wanted a name for some sort of arcane school) who taught them selves to wear plate and use their weapon as a manor of casting spells.

Because apparently casting spells without an orb/wand/staff is super fucking difficult.
Gotta train fast.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Meh, I like the religious kind better. Also, I figured out what her mother did. And who the villain is. And how my storygame can have zero "bad ends" while still providing meaningful choices in the endgame. This might actually be kind of awesome, if I can pull it off. :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

/Bad/ is just a perspective.

In Necromancer all endings are /bad/ but some are /good/ to you.

The /true/ ending is just...well you murder everyone and survive so its good?

Hell.

If Jihelu makes a cameo he could make a demonic taint path.

Where the entire story derails and becomes the exact opposite.

Because paladin=warlock

But, eh, religious paladins are too mainstream (Not really).
It could get really stereotypical really fast.

Because it normally has the problem of "If you dont follow my god rules, I will take away my power from you, and then you will be useless garbage"

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

By "bad ends" I mean "you die and/or fail, the end." But this isn't a stereotypical good vs. evil plot. And that's all I'm going to say, because spoilers. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Now that I think about it, this reeks of Femdom.  A whole lot of femdom.  :o

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I want lesbian sex scenes.....

Tons of them.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

My protagonist is fifteen. :P

Though I may do some timeskips... I dunno, I guess romance and/or a casual fling isn't completely out of the question. In a no-more-than-R-rated sort of way. ;P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Jihelu will secretly be in them all.

 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Very, very secretly. So secretly, no one will ever know. ;P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

AKA "sliding her hand under her clothing"...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

O_o

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I'd be dying of laughter if there was a scene similar to Lilith's and Juniper's little feeding session xD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Um, what? I don't think so... if I wanted to write femdom, I'd write something about weavers. :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Well, then I guess I can anticipate a degree of sexism both against and for women at least :P

I'm just waiting for the scene when the main character vaporizes a man because he was hitting on her XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Or coitus.

I like my idea.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Yep, there's definitely some tension between the mostly-male, entirely mundane Hands of Justice (aka the cops) and the exclusively-female paladins (who basically get superpowers, and free rein to enforce Justice's will. XD)

But like Jihelu pointed out, you play by your god's rules, or poof! not a paladin anymore. So no gratuitous vaporizations. ;P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Unless the one in question of violating said paladin was a direct enemy to Justice :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago
...already have a 'villain'...

...who isn't evil. >:D

I'm really psyched about getting back into this, after my little detour. I'm just wondering if I want to port what I've got to Twine. >_<

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Oh man... I'm converting the first bit of Paladin's Ascent to Twine, and, well... I think I'm a convert. XD

Sorry, CYS. :/

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

But.

I WANT TO READ MY COITUS ON THIS SITE.

DON'T DO THIS TO ME.

I loved you

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

THERE IS NO COITUS. XP

But seriously: Twine. You should try it.

...converted and proselytizing! :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

WAIT NO COITUS.

YOU BETRAYED ME ONCE MORE.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Welllllll... I dunno, now I'm thinking about it. It could be fun. Making interactive erotica that isn't totally dorky seems like an... interesting challenge. XD

DAMN YOU FOR PUTTING THESE IDEAS IN MY HEAD JIHELU~!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Huh, that's a first I've seen from you.  Tildes?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

The tilde is a powerful character, and I do not use it lightly. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

~

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I put 50 points into being an atheist until realizing it probably didn't do anything and moving on haha.

Only thing I would recommend is to have fewer pages where the person makes a choice, only to be brought to a new page with 1-2 lines and be given another choice. I mean I understand the appeal of it, but it leads to an excess of pages (hence why you have so many already), and for the most part you could ignore most of them.

I feel for you here though, since I've had plenty of times where I'm like "I want them to be able to choose between X and Y", only to find the response to this is only like, 1-2 lines of different text that converges into the main story anyway.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Ahahahhaha! Ahem. Excuse me. 'Atheist' is a boolean. If it isn't 0 or 1, it ain't gonna do anything. Sorry. XD

Anyway! I like choices. And as currently implemented (which may or may not remain true as I port it to Twine, where I'm adding EVEN MORE choices), each choice has an effect. The game is secretly statting you out for 'virtue' and the equivalent of the seven deadly sins (although there are five of them), for later use.

And I don't think there's even anything wrong with having some 'empty' choices. I want the player to be participating, and to feel immersed in the world, and I think a high level of interactivity can only add to that.

 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I really wish boolean variables were a thing in the editor :(

A bit different than what I intended. More choices = less meaning to each choice, is what I'm getting at there. Fewer choices = (psychologically at least), more weight put onto each choice. You can have choices that (at the end of the day) don't actually matter, as long as you make the player THINK they matter (we're delving a bit into game-theory here though).

Anyway, won't try to talk you out of it, just figured I'd throw that out there.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Well, but is that necessarily a good thing, having fewer, weightier choices? If so, why? 

And I'm not convinced that scarcity of choice is the biggest factor in "weight." Are you going to be more casual when the game (for example) makes you choose between killing a man and sparing his life, just because earlier you made a decision about what to have for breakfast?

Not trying to be argumentative, I just think you've raised some interesting ideas. :)

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No not really. Fewer choices that are weightier simply means the player will notice the differences their choices make easier. That can be untrue though. I mean you could have a person choose between a gun and a sword, then do the entire fight based on that. Alternatively, you can have them choose between a gun and a sword, and do a play-by-play of the fight where they choose what to do. The difference here is mainly the effort required by you though, but the player will probably feel more fulfilled about the second method, especially if they realize they can die if they make the wrong choice.

Diminishing returns is the issue here though. It's a ton of more effort on your part, with less and less return for how the player fells about each choice. Will what you have for breakfast change how you feel about killing a man? No, likely not, but then the real question is, does giving the player the choice of what they have for breakfast actually add anything to the game? The answer again is no, likely not. I'm not going to feel any closer to my character if I get to choose if they have cereal or oatmeal for breakfast, I'm not going to think I'm advancing them in any sort of meaningful way, and I'm ultimately not going to put much thought into the choice itself either.

I mean, you can simply say their character gets up and gets dressed, describing their attire, or you could step by step ask them every element of what they plan to wear, making sure to mention it whenever you describe them. Will they care about choosing every piece of clothing? Maybe, who knows, but at the end of the day it will cause you much more work, and it probably won't be more than a passing thought to them, adding little to the experience itself.

Though, maybe at the end of the day it's the length of the pages that bothers me haha. To me it just seems like less than a paragraph on a page = that person didn't put much effort into the choices, so why did they bother.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I guess I see it as subtle expressions of character. I probably wouldn't do 'outmeal vs. cereal,' but... for example, where you choose between a standard prayer or a personal one. (Or a standard one vs. a snarky one, if you griped about the food.)

Sure, it affects 'virtue' (and/or 'apathy' and/or 'hubris'), in a very small way, but mostly it's... well, roleplaying, I guess? It's a chance to decide what your character is like, one small choice at a time.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Day one is now complete in Twine, at 4,334 words over 90 passages.

Absolutely nothing exciting happens, but I think it's needed to establish some things about the character and her initial circumstances.

I'm waffling on whether to include finding the money and shopping in day two... I feel like there needs to be something between day one and her being tapped as a paladin candidate, but I'm not sure if that's it.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Perhaps a scene for how well she can synergize with other people at the temple?

Also, do all paladins worship the same god, or do gods have their own paladins?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I'm thinking she's going to (have the option to try to) stop some bullies. Gotta start figuring out how fight scenes work. :D

Within the local religion, only Justice is known for having paladins. It's possible that Night has... well, probably not paladins per se.  But something. Something you don't want to meet in the dark. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Ooh...like this?

http://static.tumblr.com/06ec272285e4f38efed1f6e3a9443c44/w8lbcba/Yrommvhvd/tumblr_static_character_006.jpg

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago
Not bad, but they'd be female. Maybe like this.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Again, the impractical armor trope has come back to bite us in the ass.

That being said, practical armor shouldn't really show of a woman's body more than it would a man's. :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

My point stands as straight and erect as a FLAG.

Anyhow, a question to be axed...

Will there ever be a hot necromancer that can get even a prude like me wet?Prince to be saved as a hilarious side story?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Oh man. Someday I'm totally going to write a 'save the prince!' game. Probably not this time, but some day. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I was hoping you'd answer the crossed out question...but it'd probably be a 85% no.

That 15% though...e.e

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No necromancers in Paladin. If there's going to be a necromancer, he/she/they will get their own storygame.

...which I'm not going to think about right now. I have a project. >_<

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I know, I know... that was actually one of the better armor choices out of my 'female assassin' image search. And at least she looks like she's actually ready for a fight, instead of standing around looking 'sexy.' :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Why is it that your combat mechanics are never set up before you get to combat? XD 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

:P

Original combat mechanics are hard! But I've found a wait-to-attack-better mechanic in an IF rogue-like that reminds me of a mechanic I came up with years ago, so I'll probably use something like that. Plus some rock-paper-scissors with different guards, probably.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Are you using stats to decide what works? One of the games I played used the stats regarding personalities to decide if an attack would work, perhaps you could use that? 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Sounds interesting, link?

There's probably going to be some very basic stats: strength and speed and skill. Still trying to figure out a good way to train speed...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It's a pay to play, unforunatley. (Way Walkers, specifically)

Running? Lots of running trains speed. 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

More like stamina, unless you were focusing on SPRINTING and reflexes.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Hmm, looks interesting! I'll give the demo a play. Thanks. :)

Running will make you faster at running. Not convinced it'll make you faster at hitting someone with a sword before they hit you. Lots of drills, I suppose.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

No problem. It's a fantastic game (and it's sequel was fun as well)

Oh, you mean dexterity. (I assumed fast meant fast in running :p). No idea. Probably the hardest thing to train, though. Probably only way would to do one-hit spars for reaction time and speed.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Strength training and agility training should boost a tiny bit of the other stat?

Weight lifting + more strength + little more speed

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Hmm... yeah, probably.

I'm still not sure how much it's going to matter, in the end... i.e., if the final 'boss' is just going to be balanced to your level anyway. Certainly there's going to be something you can only do if you max out your training, but it might just be "you finally beat that instructor / sparring partner who's been pissing you off for half the game." XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Sorry to go off topic here but Way Walkers is awesome. Jamie is an excellent writer and the story is so intriguing. The only thing that bugs me is that it doesn't feel as open as some other games

SMALL SPOILER ALERT!

e.g when you try to kill this tiger thing it ALWAYS kills you >:( I was unhappy with that...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Way Walkers IS awesome, but you guys didn't warn me it isn't actually finished! Now I've got to wait for the third installment! XD

*reads author's blog*

"The first WW:U is 145,811 words with code, and aprox 131229 without code. ... It took eight months working an average 6 hours a day to write."

...wow.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

The fun of the game is the waiting. Started reading it when way walkers was first released, been waiting for the end since then. XD 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Weren't you the one who said Zombie Exodus was the only worthwhile game on Choiceofgames? :P

But yeah, truly a great game. Can't wait until the 3rd comes. Out :D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Just broke 5,000 words and 100 passages! And that's still just the first day, I decided to flesh out the morning activities a little bit. Basically I'm procrastinating on the next day because I'm still not sure what I want to do... but at least I'm procrastinating by adding to the game! XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I wonder if the girl will be taking a dominant role in a relationship...?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It's a choice-driven game, so that'd be a resounding 'maybe.' XD

Though it's really all going to be quite vanilla. But there's probably going to be a shy girl you can pursue, and a bolder one who will put the moves on you, if you seem receptive. And probably a virtually-unobtainable one where you have to play your cards exactly right. Oh, and the token straight relationship. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

So the straight path do-

Godammit.  I was going to go shipping and handling for days...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

XD

I suppose I should probably put in more than one straight path. What with straight people being the majority of my probable players and all. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Not that I wanted straight to be the main focus, but when I like to choose a partner...

I like to Choose

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Which is a really valid point, in this kind of game. Okay, six paths it is... *eyes deadline* ...maybe. Or maybe four. But evenly split, anyway. ^_^

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Since you seem to have an atheist path in your story, perhaps you could put the polar opposite in your story and have a path where the main character can become a religious fanatic. By adding this plotline, you could possibly question the philosophical nature of justice, and what it means to be "good" or "just." For an example, the protagonist as a religious fanatic would be driven by a strong sense of justice, but to the point of leaving little room for leeway on anything else that isn't what protagonist views as "justice." The protagonist's "justice" could be completely warped and twisted into something that barely reassembles any modern day view of justice, or her "justice" could be something compassionate and empathetic or basically what we view as "justice" in our modern day society. This could change depending on the choices made throughout the storyline. And the best part? No matter what the protagonist does, the protagonist would still be worshipped as a hero, because the protagonist will always follow some form of "justice." Of course, if you want to add some even sicker irony you could have the protagonist condemned for having the "wrong" form of justice when the character follows a modern day view of "justice," but be praised as a hero when the character follows the path obtaining a sick twisted demented form of "justice." And since we're still on the subject of irony, you could also add some sick irony in it by making the protagonist in the atheist plotline the most "just" person out of all paths, but still be disowned by her peers because she does not believe in "what's right."

Anyways, this idea of "justice" might be something you might want to play around with, whether you decide to allow the protagonist to become a religious fanatic or not. Afterall, the protagonist does follow some form of "justice," doesn't she? Is she really that "just" or is she just disillusioned? Is the antagonist also following some form of "justice?" Who's right and who's wrong? Overall, who decides what is justice?

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Thank you for the input!

The atheist branch isn't a full path... if you want to disbelieve right up until the point where you meet Justice face-to-face, you can do that, but your atheism is not going to survive that encounter. XD

I don't want to say too much about what I'm doing, because spoilers, but the endgame definitely focuses on the player character deciding for themselves 'who's right and who's wrong'... and I'm going to do my best to make sure it's a highly debatable point. >:D

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I've been "studying" for your story by playing an Atheist Paladin in D&D with my friends. He's actually managed to believe stubbornly through more than one encounter. (Of course, his last explanation is "Aliens!" until I he can think of a better one...)

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

XD

Man, I miss D&D...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Day 2 is now complete, with a visit to the market and a conversation with the Warden the Priestess of the Wards.
 

Current totals: 8,584 words, 172 passages. Supposedly. I don't know, I'm kind of wondering if the word-counting isn't off somehow. It doesn't feel like day 2 took 3,500+ words. o_O

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

If anyone wants to play what I've got so far, it's up here.

If you'd rather wait for it to be actually finished, that's cool too. XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Now, I'm going to be serious here, so I must say, Twine is a really good system for the story, specifically. I like how you chose which words to click, instead of the choices on CYS. 

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Mwahahaha, a new convert!

Oh wait, we're being serious. Whoops, sorry. XD

I'm definitely liking it, yeah. I'll probably add in more of the white keywords that just provide more information... I feel like I'm using them a little too inconsistently right now. Though to be clear, that's just a convention I added myself, with some CSS to color <span class="info"> tags around those particular links.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

What if you color-code the keywords so that they adhere to a certain stat?  Like atheism stat or strength, etc?

...that'd be hella hard to keep track tho.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

You could. I wouldn't for this game, since the main stats I'm tracking are supposed to be hidden from the player, but you totally could.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Sigh. Putting this on the back burner. I blame Blue Lacuna, for being good enough to make me realize that my project... wasn't as good as I wanted. I'm still hoping to salvage something from it, but I think I need some distance before I can figure out what, if anything, is worth keeping.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Goddammit Morgan! XD

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

I blame Twine. :P XD

Sorry to hear that Morgan, I thought it was pretty good.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

It's not bad. It might even be pretty good. But it isn't amazing. I'd much rather stop here and regroup than pour more words into it, because I'm pretty sure I can do better.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

See the selected section on the right? That's how much I'm cutting. :/

*cuts*

Current stats: 5,344 words over 106 passages.

Sigh...

*cuts more*

Under 5k now, but at least I'm done cutting!

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Current stats: 7,063 words over 149 passages.

So that's 2,000 words in 5 days... 400 words a day.

About two months left 'til Spring Thing... 60 x 400 + 7,000 = 31,000.

...I need to pick up the pace. :P

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

...I think I'm back to gay relationship paths outnumbering straight ones. Oops. ;P

Unless I decide to drop the sex-based segregation of the wards, and not have your two initial friends' genders swap to match yours... hmmm.

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Well, it's fine, just as long as you aren't purposely ending all the straight ones in tragedy for sexuality bias.

...that's gonna be a no.  Seeing how wards are going to be among the more troubled kids, it'd be very likely for the male wards to let out some frustration, and vice versa for females...

Paladin's Ascent

10 years ago

Too late, I put 'em all together (albeit with separate 'washrooms,' since that lets me have a gender choice.)

I figure they just keep a close eye on them. :P