In the Pale Moonlight

This was a great game. I started reading before the contest results were announced and wasn’t surprised to hear it got 1st. Congrats. From the violent killings to the “calm before the storm” Lodge preparations, it was very impressive how you set the tone.

*Spoilers*

Let’s start with the things I enjoyed the most: The main character and his badassery, the lore, and the werewolf primal urges.

The Main Character: Good ol’ Willy. Like the description states, you have completed 12 hunts and the game takes place on the 13th. There is an interesting background page regarding William’s childhood and father – I recommend finding it (I don’t think you’re forced into it). Rather than a generic Van Helsing knock-off, which would have been an easy pit to fall into, the MC has his own story and is shaped by his own unique past.

The Main Character’s Badassery: Ok, I decided this gets a section of its own. You’re armed with a shotgun and a revolver. Pure badass. Depending on the choices you make, you become blessed by a prominent Nordic figure and make the Alpha Wolf your Alpha Bitch. Oh, and did I mention he smokes weed?

The Lore: The game shows us an unseen war that has been going on for centuries that has elements from Catholicism and Norse Mythology. An ancient order that protects weak humans from terrifying beasts could easily turn cliché, and I think Steve did tremendously well keeping the reader from having an “I’ve been here before” feeling.

The Primal Urges: HUNT! KILL! EAT! Need I say more?

There wasn’t anything that jumped out as something the story desperately lacked or needed to change. I didn’t mind The Fool’s riddles; I thought it was a fun twist and a nice break to the dark, gloomy setting. There were a couple places where a title or sentence was mistyped, but that’s easily corrected and didn’t affect my rating at all. I read through two endings and was deeply entertained the whole time.

8/8

A Hunter! The true hope for humanity, a fiery beacon in the darkness, but sometimes you must work In Service to the Night!

Any ways, this story was a lot better than I thought it would be, for a 63k story written in a month. The beginning just set up the whole feel of the story quite well. The background and purpose of the hunters was interesting to read, as well as how they operate.

The characters were pretty developed and cool. Even though they didn't have the longest life span in the story, the each had their own distinct personality from the start. Mr. Gaange was pretty mysterious, I spent some time wondering when he would come up again.

The main thing I noticed that I didn't like was that it seemed whenever you were to FEED! it led immediately to an end game link (The Call of the Moon). It seems a good amount of the endings seemed to come up abruptly, but once again, contest entry on a time crunch so meh.

Although I'll assume there was probably a whole branch dedicated to helping the werewolves anyway. Works for me as I wasn't planning on joining those furry bastards.

Another thing, I really liked the action scenes as well, they seemed to capture the brutal and animalistic nature of fighting vampires and other such beasts of the night to the death.

Any ways, good job as always Steve.

IT WAS AMAZING

Ho-ly shit. This was AMAZING

I picked a ending that got me killed and let me say that it was VERY dark and I loved it.

The only thing I dislike about this is that there is no probable ending the Wyatt doesn't die.

good

Very well done. loved the sense of immersion

I gave it a six because unless you explore everything, it's impossible to figure out how to destroy the mine and end it; by the end, I was tired of exploring; however, it's still a great game with a lot of interesting paths. I think it would be great to have some kind of sequel featuring the fool more, and more information about the hunters training.

This was an amazing story. I have it a 7 because I felt like some of the character was missing... But then again, I died pretty early, so I can't say that.