September the 14th Part I

I really don’t know how this game is still up. It’s, in the kindest words possible, absolutely terrible. At least I got a free point.

Some spoilers below.

First of all, don’t introduce characters through showing a drawing of them. If it’s that important for the reader to know what they look like, describe them through writing.
The characters were one-dimensional and flat. I get that this is meant to be humorous, but that doesn't mean the characters should have zero personality.

I’d suggest expanding the scene where Tiff and Tuff are murdered, it’s an opportunity to give them actual character traits, flesh out their motivations, and give the reader a reason to care about (or despise) them. Actually, I’d suggest expanding pretty much every scene. It reads like a summary, with no detail or elaboration, and about two sentences per page.
Everything was clumped together in one paragraph in the early parts of the story, making it hard to decipher who was talking and what was happening. You need a paragraph break whenever the topic changes, or, in dialogue, the person speaking changes.

The girlfriend/boyfriend, (your name), he/she, stuff got tiring. Just assign the characters genders, it’ll make it much smoother to read.

The entire plot was lolrandom. It takes effort and good writing to make a lolrandom story decent, and there are other and better ways to make something funny. Just keep the story a bit more on the logical side for now.

It all, it was terrible and I don’t recommend it to anyone.

Well, I can see that some effort went into the making of this; I'll certainly give you that. But the entire creative purpose of this games seems to be to mock characters and programs designed for young children to begin with. Why exactly do you hate them, Deven711? This story leaves me with several questions, but I'll only ask the one that is eating at me the most: why did you create pages with links saying "Try to dodge it" and "Let it hit you"? Why on Earth would I allow a laser beam, bullet, etc. to strike me in the chest?! Also, do you truly only watch South Park for the foul language and such? That really isn't the point of watching a mature satirical cartoon, is it?

Anyway, I suppose the problem is that you and I do not share the same sense of humor, so I suppose I simply can't appreciate your comedic stories. I have given this a 5/8 for pacing and effort, though.

I was actually laughing a bit while reading this! It brought so much excitement to me and I’m glad it wasn’t so boring.

So, I played this as a kid, which I thought this the best thing ever but as a 20-something, I can say it holds up.

Which is why I gave it a 1 for being number one.

This game and I are about the same age. I don't know which one is the most mature.

not the best

HuMaNiTy Is BeAuTiFul

it's fucking nice! hahahahahaha!: pathetic tif; and stupid tuf! they all died!

i loved it.
it was long and entertaning
i recomend it

What is this?