The Lemonade Business

Although the initial premise was nice, I kind of felt like this story plot-jumped around way too many times.

In the beginning, we learn the protaganist is a pretty poor person and can't afford things. Therefore, he/she decides to make a lemonade stand. However, the plot jumps around a lot and it doesn't seem very logical or realistic. For example, after just two days of lemonade business you are approached by the fun-fair organizer. So apparantly just in two days you gain enough popularity/your lemonade business rockets that a fair organizer approaches you? That doesn't seem really real, and also, I'm pretty sure that organizing a shack at a fair costs money. The writing clearly says, and I quote, "...you have, like, 20 bucks...". After the first day it tells you have 7, and if were to estimate for the second day, it would be in the 7 range as well, so I'm pretty sure you can't run a lemonade shack at a fair with just $35.00 on your hand. And then, after the fair episode, you are approached by a woman who tells you to make your own store? I'm not familiar with how much money shack-runners get at fairs, but I certainly don't think its enough to run your own store at a shopping plaza! If that were the case, shacks at your local carnival would be so much different. Plus, this is from one woman's opinion. Nobody else told him to make a lemonade store (whatever that is). And then, after the store, you are approached by mall people to extend your business, and then known globally? That's a huge jump right there. And then it gets even worse because at that time, it ends.

I think the author was trying to drive out a RPG-ish story at best, considering the usage of items, and then a map, which were both used twice and once, respectively. The plot felt very linear, as you weren't really making a lot of desicions. Usually its "do you run the shack or nah" and we can clearly see here which one leads to glory, and which one doesn't. It felt like the author was trying to force you along the path instead of you making your own choices that would deeply affect and twist around the story however you liked it. As an example, sometimes it gives you the only choice of making lemonade, when it should have the map, go outside, etc.

Going along with the author's RPG intentions, I would suggest doing that, making a Lemonade Stand sim. You have to shop for ingrediants, whilst watching the amount of supplies you have day after day. Depending on what the weather was (as an example) you could make your lemonade hot or cold, and you could accumulate money and shop for other things to attract customers...

etc...

The writing was good at least. I caught some errors in the writing, like a mispelled word or bad punctuation, but in the end, it was all good.

But in the end we got a very linear plot where it feels the author is making the desicions for you.

4/8. I'm going to play Part 2 now.

yeah

shit is fire yo

It's charming for some reason, I can't put it in good words, but it's just a feel-good story. You don't have to think too much besides mindless clicking, grinning and reading a barebones story with little to no depth at all.

And to be honest, I don't mind it that much haha. It's like your average story game flick and it does the thing that it wants to do competently enough that I don't feel the need to write an entire rant 'bout it.

So kudos to you!

This was a pretty nice little story. Fun and kind of childish but I wasn't really expecting much else. Good work.

8/8 lol.

I would do 7, but NOTHING, I mean NOTHING, is better than Reeses. So, eh, nice game!

It was funny and realistic enough for me not to click off, but unrealistic enough to be funny. Good job!

This game piqued my interest because it seemed kind of like a money-management game. However, there wasn't much of a money-making premise at all. I feel that you could add a bit more depth to it. For example, shouldn't you have to restock your supplies at some point? And wouldn't you have to pay to secure a spot at the carnival?
However, I did like the strategic placement part. More detail and time put into this would make it a much better game.

You become a lemonade seller, and your favorite color is blue now. There's apparently no way for you to lose but it's great making lemonade.

Pretty good, I think I gave it a higher rank then it deserves, but for some reason, I actually really enjoyed reading it. 6/8

Really enjoyed this. It was great fun, not meant to be taken too seriously, and I just really, really liked it. Sure, it was linear, but I was too busy getting caught up in the thrill of making lemonade and upgrading my signs to notice.