You're adventures in the forbidden forest

Good: You made some sense and wasn't just completely random. None of the links where broken. The endings where sound, and there where endings. You got it finished

Bad: too short, WAY too short even for a non-linear story. The encounters where barely tolerable and what happens is based purely on chance. There is no way to tell what will happen if you choose something. The options where on and off, this story was perfect to use as many options as possible. You could've easily fit 5-10 links oneach page added in some longer paragraphs and come out with a high level story.

My advice is to take this off, and re-do it. It has some potential.

Aside from the obvious complaint in the title (My ex-Grammar Nazi nerves are tingling) the story lacked a lot. Story, grammar, hooks, detail, and overall unsatisfying.

Whoops, sorry about my 2 comment thing. I though the first one didn't go through. Sorry!

Happy thinks it's okay. It's a bit too short, but it was entertaining. 4/8

It's a bit too short.... Happy thinks it's okay. 4/8