Bannerlord, The Novelist
Videogames: I'm a fan of Dragon Quest, Mount & Blade, Town of Salem, Pokemon, and Minecraft. - I am currently playing Pokemon Sun.
Books: I'm a fan of Deltora Quest, Cirque Du Freak and Blade. - I am currently not reading anything. Top priority would be Eragon, Blade 3 and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
To Do List:
(On this site)
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Finish unfinished stories.
Obtain Top Rater trophy.
Create a personal rating system.
Improve writing ability.
Improve coding ability.
I am participating in the January Contest.
I'm always up for a duel.
If you ever want a co-author, I'm always up for it.
If you ever need someone for proofreading, I'm always up for it.
Music/Musicals That I Like:
Source of Profile Picture:
"I'm at rock bottom already ;)"
"I'm not doubting that so much as I am doubting that blind people are human."
"F-fine! I was tired of denying it anyway...
I like ecchi stuff, okay? I can't help being a perverted degenerate. I don't need anyone's acceptance because I have my own narcissism to fall back on!
-TharaApples, exposing her true colors.
"Also, you can't back up your claims I'm not backing up your claims that I'm not backing up my claims, so go eat one large vagina and get back to me on that, child."
"Is that a cock and a fuck mixed together?"
"Back to the bowl argument = drink the fcking liquids from your bowl you gentrified bourgeoisie sheep."
"You are a cancer on the site and presumably in real life, and your mother should've swalloed you."
"Did we cut things to death in our early days, or did we punch holes in things like we still do today?"
"Away, I'd rather sail away,
Like a swan that's here and gone."
-Simon & Garfunkel
"I want a 3D model of Lara Croft's dick in my ass"
Threads that deserve to be preserved:
Final Vote Tally for The Final Days Game Master:
*TO BE UPDATED*
*TO BE UPDATED*
You begin your journey as a tamed dragon but you then encounter the forest of the feral dragons, desperate for members to help hunt, guard, fight and heal. The times for the clan will especially need you to save them.
But are you fit to survive the dangerous hardships?
Please note that I'm not the best person at description and any criticizing yet encouraging comments is desired.
Once my entry for the January New Frontier contest, now currently being updated!
In the land of Esnad, the kingdom of Untha has been at war with the Harstians for 3 months. The Harst's kingdom enacted the war because of their expansionist ideals and Untha's weak army. Times are tense for all of Untha's citizens, for the Untha army has been mass-recruiting it's citizens and a single slip-up from one of the generals may spell doom for the Untha kingdom. The appearance of The Order does not help this state of affairs, for they frequently kidnap civilians. The Unthian king has devised a strategy for the eradication of this cult, by devising a highly-trained, small spell-resistant armor toting elite force known as The Guard. The plan is to have you get captured by The Order, thus distracting them long enough for The Guard to infiltrate and massacre The Order. Good luck, and do the Unthian kingdom proud.
Recent PostsEndMaster’s Edgelord Contest on 3/1/2017 12:32:32 AM
Well, in that case, I'd like to apologize for sounding pretentious all the time. I guess I'm just too much of an expert at it for my own good.
EndMaster’s Edgelord Contest on 3/1/2017 12:11:24 AM
I believe I was referring more to skimming than actually reading in my original post, but didn't clarify or specify that in any way. I'd also like to say that I sound incredibly pretentious in my original post upon re-reading, and for that I apologize.
EndMaster’s Edgelord Contest on 2/28/2017 10:58:12 PM
Ah, so that's why you were able to respond so quickly and the insult mostly lacked relevancy to my story or myself. Fairly disappointing, but I guess it's my fault for not posting sooner.
Knights of the New Order (REVISED) on 2/28/2017 5:54:38 PM
I was thinking more along the lines of something very brief, just enough so the reader sees the king doing something in action rather than his actions being told to the player. Although that may be true, I believe that if apparently his death is important and almost everybody who hears it is saddened by it, there should at least be some interactions he does to make the reader feel something when he dies. Batman's parents dying wouldn't have as much impact if his parents weren't made out to be real people with distinguishable personalities.
I can't seem to find any on 2/28/2017 4:57:30 PM
Just like how there are a few bad apples in a good community, there are a few good apples in a bad community.
Knights of the New Order (REVISED) on 2/28/2017 2:36:48 PM
You can show his actions before he dies, then lead up to his death. Alternatively, you can have a sort of flash-back scene where the narrator/someone reminiscing during the aftermath of his death describes the actions and deeds he did.
Knights of the New Order (REVISED) on 2/28/2017 1:19:25 PM
"It was a dark and stormy night."
Probably the most clique, lazy opening line you could possibly come up with. I highly recommend that you rewrite this to be descriptive or specific, such as adding that the clouds are blocking out moonlight or something to that effect.
I also agree with Ebon on the possibility of the assassin easily killing extremely important political figures; there would most likely be guards patrolling every inch of the castle, including watching the walls and windows for any intruders. Perhaps you should include some scenes where he silently takes out or distracts these guards?
Also, the way you worded the third paragraph made it seem like everyone forgot about the queen and only cared about the king, which I found strange. Speaking of the king and queen, the queen is introduced and then killed off with no character development or personality, and the same applies to the king except he has a personality that is very underdeveloped. What were these good deeds that he has supposedly done and what actions or decisions has he made that made him a kind and patient ruler? Whenever you develop a character, be sure to show and not tell.
Also, there's a spelling error:
"It always wsa, on these kinds of nights."
The Weekly Review - Edition 35 on 2/28/2017 8:54:34 AM
"A new featured called ‘SANCTIONS’ has been built. The essence of this feature is that forum posts, storygames, comments, and articles can be sanctioned by administrators. A sanctioned piece of writing is a piece of writing that an administrator has deemed to be an excellent contribution to the website. All featured comments and accepted articles from here on out are sanctioned by default. Storygames and forum posts are sanctioned manually by administrators. Only excellent contributions to the website will earn sanctions. Anything posted before 2017 is not eligible for sanctioning but admins may go and sanction some content from earlier this month. Please do not pester them with suggestions."
The Weekly Review - Edition 35 on 2/28/2017 12:00:12 AM
I was thinking the system would remove any potential bias by making it automatic and that commendations would be more decided by the community rather than the moderators, at least for storygames. But yes, the system can and would most likely be abused, and that invalidates my second point (which is purely an opinion). I also agree with your points on additional motivation, so I'm no longer for changing the system.
EndMaster’s Edgelord Contest on 2/27/2017 11:49:05 PM
Skin that was once so pure, now so tainted. The moon light shined through the open window as a gust of cold night air blew the curtains open, the room once again becoming dark when the wind receded. Her eyes were vacant of all life, wide open and unmoving. Fresh, rich blood that once pumped throughout her nimble body has now been almost completely drained, and what little that is left is stagnant and dry. The pale skin reflects the lack of nourishing blood, slowly decaying but not visible to the naked eye. No reasons for death are noticeable on her delicate frame except for two small punctures on the right side of her neck...
...You know what that means?
That’s right, it’s FUCKING VAMPIRES! WOOOOHOOOOOO! YEAH! WOOOOOOOO! FUCK YEAH, VAMPIRES! WOO! Woo! Yeah! Woo... Yeah... Woooo...
A-Anyways, uhhhhh, oh look, here comes a vampire right now!
John Hendrik Smith walked at an uneasy and unbalanced pace on a cold, moonless night towards a rugged clothing store. His birth-given name is Sir Hadrian the Second, but cultural shifts and him having to move to America as an immigrant back in 1899 because of a rather mad and large group of cucked husbands (and I’m talking LARGE here. Like, around 200... maybe 300? Don’t ask him though, he wouldn’t know what the fuck you’re talking about) forced him to adopt the most generic name he could come up with. Another adaptation he made was dressing like the red-neck degenerates that populate and breed like rats in the bum-fuck outskirts of a nearby shantytown. Not by his own devices, the aforementioned shantytown caters entirely to those inbred imbeciles, since they make up more than half of the consumer base.
Naturally, Johnny was pretty pissed when he found about this little fact, so here he was, coming through the unlocked front door and killing the store owner’s bombshell wife who was masturbating with a broken dildo in her bedroom. She tried to defend herself with that same dildo, but that didn’t work so well. She actually did pretty good at blocking his punches and kicks and shit, but the onslaughts proved to be too much for her, and, like a mortally wounded, diseased, beached whale, she fell after a fatal blow to the head. And by fatal, I mean her head literally flew off of her body through a closed window, shattering the fragile glass and the head flies over in an arc right into the closed window of another nearby clothing shop (fun fact: due to the clothing shore John was in stealing all potential customers, this clothing store had to install a few stripper poles and beer bars to still stay in business. They still haven’t converted into a full stripper club because the grandma of the family running it really wants people to buy her shitty sweaters.) A tense silence follows suit (well, aside from the horrified screams coming from the nearby clothing store), and John understandably had many thoughts running through his tiny, little brain as he froze in shock like a moron.
Well shit, guess I shouldn’t have done that roundhouse kick...
Man, hopefully I don’t have to meet Big Johnny in prison again...
Well, I mean, I guess I can try to escape, so...
And last but certainly not least:
…Wait, did I leave my oven on?!
That last, crucial thought finally aroused John from his incredibly long pause and he turns around to stealthily sneak out of the house through wide open front door, but is instead greeted by two lanky skinheads, one of them armed with a shotgun. The taller, older one with the 12-gauge looks cautious, with his muscles and face tense. His fast reaction to aiming his weapon dead-set on John serves as a testament to his wariness. The shorter, younger one behind him, on the other hand, is sucking his thumb while staring off into space cross-eyed. The older one’s eyes dart to the decapitated body of his mother, and, not liking that one bit, pierces John with his now blazing eyes, finger slightly pushing against the trigger.
“YOU FUCKING KILLED MY FUCKING MOTHER?!”
“Well, yeah, I did. I mean, I thought that was pretty ob-“
John’s sentence was cut tragically short by a short yet loud bang and a bloody indent with skin and flesh blasting outward in a beautiful display. His dull brain barely comprehended the first blast before a second one quickly followed up; this time aimed a little upwards, aiming for his chest. This one was more concentrated, since the little shithead was inching closer and closer, allowing for an even more beautiful display of blood showering everything nearby. John fell to his knees before tipping over, the shoddy floor rattling as his body made contact. Most humans would die right then and there, but John’s vampire blood allowed him to savor a few more moments in agony. He looked up at the boy, covered in blood and panting heavily, he aimed his shotgun right as John’s head and ended what would be a lifetime spanning centuries…
…Oh yeah, there was that other vampire that I forgot about at the start… Uh… He had a… a fetish for dead people… and that body was in some cabin isolated in the forest… he was uh… he was walking back after getting some groceries… and he… I don’t know, he fucked her corpse or something, I don’t really care anymore…