Cougar Crossing: Imminent Threat
, #47 for
played 1,022 times (finished 159)
"wandering through the desert"
"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"
"must be at least this tall to play"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 10. If this were a movie, it would probably be between G and PG.
Just minding your own business...
I don’t even know what to think about this. There is very little on the main page to encourage someone to read this story. Then if you do decide to read it, the very first page starts out by telling you not to read the story. Is this supposed to be ironic? A legitimate warning might be something, but even the warning is just plain silly, but not in a good way.
From there it just sort of goes downhill. There’s a strange loop when you decide to walk outside that takes you back to choosing to walk outside again. Then, when you’re walking outside you’re allowed to enter something, but there’s nothing there to enter, but you’re inside and there’s absolutely no description of the thing that you entered. I don’t know if I’m in a shack or an elephant’s intestines. But that’s okay, because apparently there’s a garage nearby (in the middle of the open prairie, apparently). In another place, apparently I’m too slow to outrun a cougar, but that’s okay because I get to choose a death ending or just walk back inside the clubhouse.
I don’t really understand the purpose of this story at all. And it’s not the usual lolrandom story where random stuff happens with random choices – it’s not that connected. It’s almost like five different people wrote this story without ever talking to each other and just deciding there’d be cougars in the story. Not a great effort here, overall, in my opinion.
on 8/13/2018 12:30:00 PM
This story is pretty random, and a leaves a lot of questions to the reader that it shouldn't. What is this clubhouse that you speak of? Where am I? Who am I? Where did a bunch of Cougars come from?
I think that this story should be properly worded better as well, so as to not leave those questions to the reader.
Its a very strange plot, where apparantly a bunch of cougars attack your "clubhouse". I think that, although there were multiple endings, the writing/plot wasy short enough and it could be extended in more ways than one. For example, adding more choices could have helped. I liked the garage scene where you had to guess the code as well, although it was pretty obvious once you got "3" and "1" where it would go. Its a simple pattern, but I guess that's as to not frustrate the reader. However, leaving some clues in other areas as to the password would help. Also, having more scenes (whcih I guess adds onto the "more choices") would also further the story, which would leave the reader with a better end feeling.
The writing was at least good enough. I caught some mispellings and other grammatical errors, but it was better than most with 4/8-and-below ratings.
-- Fazz on 8/4/2014 5:44:25 PM
on 1/31/2018 6:20:26 PM
I got the jailed-but-not-eaten-by-cougar ending
on 2/19/2017 1:15:00 PM
I might be in jail for slaughtering cougars, but at least I wasn't eaten by one!
on 1/1/2017 11:47:08 PM
Very funny and adventurous.
on 8/9/2015 5:41:52 PM
Pretty funny story! Yes, of all the things that you described, I would probably throw the stapler. One issue I did have was with the looping of the story. I think I ended up throwing 3 staplers at the same cougar because I went back into the clubhouse. Maybe a different sequence of events?
on 7/19/2015 10:08:41 PM
Oops, I forgot to make the old, redneck "they ain't too endangered if they're in my house joke".
on 3/29/2015 7:33:44 PM
This is bad. Very bad. I laughed at the idea of a cougar being attracted by a deer picture inside a drawer, though.
on 3/28/2015 1:23:41 PM
Sort of okay.
on 10/13/2014 2:56:20 PM
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