If he thinks I'm not actually playing a character when I call myself an important person in the internet, despite having used the damned thing at some point before and knowing damn well the president doesn't even get free favors, then I'm not sure he's really worth responding to. For all his inability to detect Sarcasm wherever it matters, though, it's disturbing how well he knows what I jack off to... Granted, breasts aren't the only big thing, and I think he thinks I'm one of those gross hyper-idealizing folk that people of certain self-righteous persuasions often love to hate, but such is not my affliction, un/fortunately.
It is odd, though, how he trusts us to figure out that the rant is bad just by reading it... cuz, y'know, it's self-evident, but we can't, because there's an ugly blue TL;DR painted all over it! I'm sure you can read the pixel-bloated image if you really hated your eyes, but, from what parts I can read without being distracted by an abrupt royal blue, it doesn't look like it's the average Wattpad/Warrior Cats Bulsch that demands no explanation for the fact that it's bad. There's analysis that could be happening! There's fun that could be had on all sides! This is the internet, and "He's unimportant, and also an offensive twat" just isn't that valid anymore, because we're all unimportant, offensive twats. That's what made this a discussion in the first place.
I am feeling bizarrely heartbroken for those less fortunate this morning, so if you really want me to apologize, update your amazon wishlist, and I'll pray to my false gods that somebody with more money than I buy you the anal soothing cream you seem to want.
