Siege of Pemdas Isle

Oh sh*t, my Achilles Heel, Maths… alright, let’s give this one a go. At least you make this fun in a kind of Pixar way. The first question threw me so I decided to side with the wife because it seemed safer. It was a relief to discover I can still do basic multiplication and the situations presented are fun enough that this could actually be a kid’s book. I am relieved that getting a question wrong I get automatically corrected, it helps me feel like less of a dumbass.

I am glad Mr. Byrd took me through the basic maths because there was no way I was working that out on my own without fetching a calculator. Some of the questions are definitely easier than others (like, what’s 4 x 30) and I’d recommend starting with easy questions then making them progressively more difficult. The font strangely changes at times but that’s ok. I like the reason for the Goblins fleeing the island. The calculasaurus is like all my worst nightmares rolled into one.

Then the game literally turns into a Maths exam without the relief of the fun situations between the questions. I really hope my score doesn’t show up in the comments and based on that fear I actually made an effort with it (though I swear on Question 3 I’m ordering them from the least to the greatest and not the other way round). And I totally did not google to check how many seconds are in a day (suggested answer, “not enough!”). Why is every possible answer to this question wrong? I swear this is more difficult than the Maths I learnt at school, though it’s impossible to be certain as I’ve completely mentally erased any memories of my Maths classroom or anything that happened while I was there.

Anyway, I saved Pemdas so yay. This was the very definition of an Edutainment story but my main concern is pacing: there is some very long story time and a couple of pages between maths problems and then bang – ten maths questions in a row. I’d prefer it to be more evenly spaced, with perhaps a single paragraph between each question but this might be challenging to put together. I’m impressed the writer managed to blend so many clever problems into such a fun story and actually made maths briefly interesting for me (don’t worry, I’ve return to my usual allergic-to-algebra state now). I’ll give this one 5/8 for good work.

4th-6th grade? Uh… that's close enough to seventh grade, right?

Yes, a square has its own formula, but it can also still use the same one as for other rectangles that makes the SAME EQUATION. Ok yeah no, it’s not the same. Squares are special, but not as much and Mr. Square seems to think it is. So in between these two, in my opinion.

Of course you do! And so does she! You’re BOTH SQUARES! Get over it! Is this that important? (I know this is probably for the educational part, but I JUST WANT TO YELL AT THESE… ARGH!)
I like all the things being centered on their shape. I dunno, I like it.

I’m the best mathematician? So this is the land of 4th-6th grade, not nearly enough for building the buildings they have? Absurd. A kingdom of 4th graders. Hilarious (in a good way).

Addison Addition? Lol.

Both of them! In the middle! What am I supposed to say?! If I say Mrs. Square, I badly bruise Mr. Square’s ego and I’m dismissing his point about squared numbers. I say Mr. Square, I’ll probably also hurt Mrs. Square a lot and I’ll be ignoring her point that a square is still a rectangle! What am I supposed to do?!

Oh well… Mr. Square it is I guess… sorry, Mrs. Square.

Queen! Also the best mathematician? This kingdom is doomed.

Finding the speed based on the length of the wheels? And the horses? What? And how do I know the length, do I have a magic measurer in my mind?

Patti’s working here alone? That’s sad.

Of course he’s multiplied the order, a multiplier’s got to multiply.

…You’re asking me 4 times 3? Guess this IS 4th-6th grade math… what if I do it wrong on purpose? You know what I’ll just do it correctly 12 it is.

WHAT?! She asked for pies not peaches! And it NEVER said anything about 8 peaches per pie!!!

Oh, I used go back and she DID say that. I just missed it going back and forth typing and reading… my bad. But I trust you know that I’m not that stupid. 96 it is.

So I’m not the best mathematician? Addison is?

Bees are deadly here? What’s the big fuss? Are shapes killed by bees or something? Oh, a massive bee. People hate pollinators here? They’re so important!

XD

So giant bees are killer here.

All the non-shape people are operations. :/ That was a terrible pun. So not all operations, this guy’s just the same name twice, but still.

We must bring little subtract boy!

Get away from the bees? What about the people? If you can hear bees and not hear or see people and bees kill people, the bees likely killed people!

Oh ok, not everyone’s dead.

Breathes in this situation doesn’t really make sense to me.

… More simple math… 75% obviously.

Sans?

10*15=150. 10*40=400. 150+400=550.

Why does the size and font keep changing? Keep it consistent!

550*50=27500. Also, I’m the Queen, I’m supposed to be rich, what do you mean I don’t have that kind of money?!

Math is that valuable here? And they live such short lives that they just get up to 6th grade?

Oh wait, they know more complex math but suck at the basics.

If she’s so strong why isn’t she just beating up the bees?

Hurumph? HURUMPH? I get that as an onomatopoeia, but in dialogue?!

Hats decide jobs? (this is a few pages later)

You made the correct answer least to greatest instead of greatest to least! YOU DID IT WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU DID IT WRONG, YOU DID IT WRONG, YOU DID IT WRONG! That’s 1 point from the score I was going to give deducted!!! 60*60*24=86400

… You saw my math, I didn’t delete it this time. YOU DID IT WRONG AGAIN! AGAIN!!! Not only is that 1 more point deducted, so now you’re at 2/8, but you also made it so NONE OF THE OPTIONS SAY YES! THEY ALL CLAIM TO BE WRONG! Another point deducted! I can’t decrease it anymore now, enjoy your 1/8.

How many questions are there?! Whatever, I’ll just leave my rating and review now. Not like anything else could affect my rating, I’m not bringing it up and it’s already at the bottom.

This game did exactly what it set out to do: create a series of not-very-difficult math problems, with some amusing responses for both right and wrong answers; when the reward for messing up problems is getting to see a different end, that's pretty friendly.

The pacing was, at times, a bit odd--the interlude with the bees, for example, went on a bit too long--actually, all of the moments between the problems could have been condensed, since we're here for the math at the end of the day, and a tighter structure would have helped spotlight the problems.

It would be amusing for the intended age group, and I expect it would create an incentive to get the best ending, to try again multiple times, which is a win in my book. The best feature, of course, is the narrative working out of the problems step-by-step rather than a simple "you're incorrect."

In my fantasy world, every single wrong answer plays out with a different branch, and we see the consequences of your mathematical folly, like being unprepared for the number of goblins, or not having enough peaches, and great sorrow ensuing, even tragedy, all caused by you, the incorrect calculator. That might be outside the scope of your game.

7/8 for boosting my ego. Sincerely, someone who is past Algebra 1 in schooling and definitely past 4th to 6th grade.

That beign said, for those in that age group, this is a fun and challenging game!