TacocaT, The Dramatist
The Heavens thunder and the fires roar;
Waves crash upon the shore.
When the ground quakes, the people shake,
And they fall forevermore.
Only a breeze makes the people freeze in this mighty hell storm.
A woman, left behind, left for dead, cries out
"Please," sobbing she continues, "please save his life."
They don't see her.
They don't hear her.
They don't notice her, even when they trip on her and fall on their faces in their frenzied panic to escape the endless burning.
She huddles over the boy crying pitifully in the cradle protectively.
Bodies litter the ground, and her hope fades fast with each one that falls.
She holds on to life as long as possible, but she cannot make it. With one last rasping breath, she whispers in the boys ear one last thing before closing her eyes for the last time; "I'm sorry." She surrenders to the darkness willingly, yet regretfully.
Willing to forget the pain, to forget the strife life brings, and surround herself with the comfort this darkness brings. Yet regretful that she could not help the boy that was barely a year old.
Finally, her heart stops and she lays limp on the boy destined to save or break the world.
Not many people do this, but I do not advise reading this game. Though (in my opinion) well written in the sense that it's put together in a way that's not monotonous, it is an experiment to see if I can make a story interesting with no plot, no driving force that pushes it forward.
It's inspired by a story titled "The Slow Regard Of Silent Things" by Patrick Rothfuss. I thought it intriguing how he was able to do it - the original containing 8 pages about making soap, and that being one of the most 'exciting' things in the story. There was no dialog, or other characters either, besides a vague mention of 'he' or 'him' sort of as a side note. Despite all that, strangely enough, I still found it enjoyable to read.
So that's generally what I'll be trying out here - no plot, no dialog, and no other characters. It's done on purpose, so I'd appreciate it if there weren't any comments like 'There should be more plot' or 'Why aren't there more characters?'. Instead, I'd like helpful criticism - how I could improve in this direction. Be as brutal as you want, as long as it's helpful.
All that aside, this is set in an old house. A very circumspect house. It did not take well to people tramping all over the place inside it. People just did not know how to respect things properly! But the child who lived there did. So naturally, the house tolerated the child's presence, though not without some moaning here and there.
But this is not about the house. This is about the child. Raz.
Harkaniams School of Naming is a top-notch naming school, one of the hardest subjects of magic ever known.
Which is rather astounding, seeing how well humans have named everything else, to every species of animal, to every rock in the ground, and every tree reaching for the sky.
Only a few have a talent for naming. To name is to command, to control, to see past all barriers and see something for what it is behind all masks and barriers. It is our gift, and our curse.
My first story game and something spun off of a school assignment. Please feel free to suggest anything, whether it's adding more details to certain places to taking out a character so it's not confusing.
What will you do? Will you destroy the life of hundreds, if not thousands of people? Will you kill innocent people, or will you save them? Will you find people to ally with, or will you venture out alone? Will you venture out at all?
Will you be a hero, or a monster?
.........gonna have to re-write this part later. Sounds a bit cheesy......... '>_>
Everyone has their secrets, things kept hidden from view. Their past, their fears, their blackened heart, their monsters. Things just under the skin.
If you don't like;
~Remarks that can be interpreted as sexist, racist, homophobic, or stereotypical (I personally greatly disagree with these remarks myself, but they're there to provide diversity among characters so they're not monotonous.)
~Characters that are highly insulting, either in nature or how they are betrayed. (there is a lesbian couple that is 'evil', but, again, I personally greatly disagree with this.)
~Reading (It's a story game, not a video game)
~Slight lack of choices in certain areas
~inaccurate descriptions of madness/insanity
~Complexity in both plot and some sentence structure
~Most likely inaccurate descriptions of setting/what it's like in that situation
~Grey vs Grey (no clear villain or hero, but still two opposing forces)
~High chance of not-so-good ending.
~Inaccurate descriptions of wounds/pain levels
~References/allusions/quotes to/of various things, including religious texts (which may be mentioned in either good, neutral, or bad views/contexts.)
~Bad humor (Perverted jokes, bad jokes, bad puns, witty one liners, bad pickup lines, some horrifying combination of the five, all worthy of a nice, hard, face palm)
~Colorful language (cussing and words like 'dick' and 'bloody ashes', also....interesting description word choices - like calling a woman's breasts 'the two savage watermelons you got there'. I really really hate writing with that kind of thing....)
Then I highly suggest that you stay away from this storygame.
We've had complaints about almost all of the things listed above, and then I added a couple extra warnings for this story. If you read it anyway, I ask of you to not down rate it because of those things - I did warn you, and you could have chosen not to read it. It's not like I'm asking you to excuse bad shpeling or teh grammerz or if therz bad plt or bad caractors or no puntuaton.
*****Note; I will be taking it down often after I first publish it to work on it so you can restart it, and replay as other characters and have their decisions affect the game in addition to the choices that were made as a different character. Saved games are always automatically erased when a story is unpublished.*****
*****Note #2: If you can send me a private message with where all the references/allusions/quotes are, and what they refer to, then I'll give you a prize. The most common would a be a couple free drawing requests of my highest quality work [with certain restrictions on the request of course, such as nothing involving nudity], though other things could be worked out if you don't want that. I would be highly impressed if you could actually do it.*****
Hell inside my head, written by me.
Here I come, and there I go.
Spinning carelessly to where no body knows.
Here I came, and there I went.
Talking to nobody, and mind all bent.
I know I'm not normal,
I know I'm quite insane.
Really, I do not like this reality.
Someone, please, wake me up.
Save me from this mentality,
I know that I had previously had a game called this; but I changed it so I could have this be more closely related to the original version of the school project. Warning: detailed scenes, mild language, etc.
Well, there is no better place for a hook then here when you decide whether or not you actually want to read it, right?
4 years earlier...
This was the first time ever that my parents were going to let me stay at home alone for a night (or half of one).With only the instructions to; one, not burn the house down. Two, don’t kill anyone. Three, don’t do anything that you know you aren’t supposed to. Four, don’t eat the leftover lasagna because it was for my mom’s work tomorrow. Five, don’t stay up past 9:00 pm, etc. It was getting late and I started getting ready for bed.
Yes! I finally convinced my parents to let me stay home all by myself, though; it’s not as fun as I thought it would be. I can’t believe that they’re actually letting me be alone instead of with a babysitter.
I checked the clock that now read 9:06 PM on it.
I should probably get into bed, that was one of my instructions, don’t stay up past 9:00.
Once I was snug as a bug in a rug in my covers, I heard the door open to the front door and figured my mom was home early from work. Then I heard a muffled groan and then a couple minutes later, a small muffled shriek that kind of sounded like my mom, but much more deep and echo-y. I slowly got up, carefully so I didn’t make the floor of my old house creak, and started towards the door. An agonized howl rang through the house and what sounded like the scrabbling of claws on tile. I moved faster now, my mind racing, hoping that my mother wasn’t hurt by the thing in our kitchen. When I entered the dining room, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
There was a wolf in our kitchen.
I panicked and grabbed the closest thing I had to a weapon, which ended up being a large skillet off the counter, and hit it as hard as I could over the back of its head. It flew a few feet to the left and laid still. Its eyes were glazed with death, but somehow, they were familiar. I walked cautiously forward until I realized with a jolt why they were so familiar. I stumbled backward rubbing my eyes just to make sure that it was true.
They were my mothers.
Most believe that what we are in currently is reality, and that when they are asleep, we are dreaming. A few believe that this is yet only a dream, and that what others think is dreaming, is actually reality.
What if it was neither? What if every time you go to sleep, you wake up to a different world, a different reality, just as vivid and lethal as the other, and never actually 'dreaming'?
Recent PostsA New Year... on 12/30/2016 3:04:16 AM
1) Write on a single thing instead of five. (I got 7 full length google doc pages done today, except it was on three different stories, only two pages of which is for a cyoa... >_>)
2) Finish the two piano compositions I'm working on, to bring my total finished up to 7.
3) Work on improving my drawing and painting abilities, to include detailed shading, realistic hands, and proportionate heads for the drawing part. Color mixing and layering for the painting.
4) Work on hitting those pesky high notes in my singing. It's great except for those pesky few notes.
5) Stop being a chocoholic.
6) Be able to bench press more then 55lbs. Cause seriously, that's really pathetic. I get squished with a 55lb bar. -_- I really thought I'd be able to lift something that's 1/3 my weight, especially after seeing this really small dude lift 75, buh nope. Stupid noodle arms.
7) Explore this world that exists outside of my bedroom. I heard there's this huge bright lamp in a giant roofless room that can change the color of your skin. I think it's called the sun. It sounds scary. I think I'll just say here for now.
I Need A New Manga on 12/29/2016 10:47:05 PM
Fairy Tail, Death Note, One Piece, Battle Royal, Blue Exorcist, Soul Eater, Sword Art Online, Noragami, Tokyo Ghoul... Each of these are both manga and anime.
?237 pages of Manga titles with about 50 titles for each page. 11,850-ish total Manga titles. Free with ads on the edges if you want to use it, but nothing you have to see before reading the manga itself.
There's also Kissanime.ru/AnimeList which has 138 pages of 50 anime titles per page, which totals to roughly around 6,900, but that's including duplicates with subs and dubs. Also free, with ads on the edges that you don't even have to glance at to get to the anime itself.
They're both updated with the latest stuff as soon as possible. Dunno about the manga one, but the anime one is updated episode by episode as it comes out.
Hunter x Hunter on 12/21/2016 7:06:57 PM
Weak main character, complex personalities, and changing looks as the story progresses.... Welp, Try Fairy Tail. (Yeah, not a typo. Tail, not tale.)
Procrastination Problems on 12/3/2016 1:33:37 AM
I want to respond to this. I have this really long thing I wanna say about it. But it's a lot of words, and overwhelming. I'll do it later after binge watching several more episodes of this tv show I really like.
Help on 12/1/2016 7:08:49 PM
This kind of thing goes in advanced editor forum, just a tip for the future.
This should help:
Writing Prompts #20 on 10/23/2016 10:51:33 PM
"Amari! Come! Look at this!" Josu yelled, scrambling over the broken remains of what historians say was York New City. He was huffing, having troubles carrying his weight over the ruins. Technically they weren't supposed to be here. Technically they were supposed to be underground still. But the investigators and the explorers said that the surface was on the verge of being livable again, and that the poisonous magic that'd chased them underground in the first place was fading away. And they were tired of the same sights and the same tight and condensed tunnels.
The sky was unnerving though. What was to stop them from just falling off the earth? They said the earth was round. So what if they stumble to the side of it and slipped off? They didn't like thinking about it, and carried around these things called umbrellas to block out the sky. Out of sight, out of mind. The historians said they were used to keep water falling from the sky off the people. Neither of them believed that happened though. How would it fall from the sky? And why would the people want it off them? Were it Josu and Amari there, they'd be trying to collect as much of it as possible.
Josu picked up a skull. It was the shape of a human skull.
And it had the beginning nubs of the horns of a warlord, the race of brute beasts that historians said fell from the sky too and wielded magic, something the world never had before.
There were halfbreeds.
Things clicked in their head.
They didn't win the war and barely survive it.
The warlords had decimated their population, and had their own half bred children masquerading as human.
That explained how there was light for a thousand years.
Explained how there was plentiful food.
Constantly clean water.
People going missing.
They weren't survivors.
They were penned livestock waiting to be slaughtered.
Favorite video game on 9/24/2016 5:48:10 PM
This site likes tacos apparently?
Zelda twilight princess is my favorite.
*Hops on bandwagon* on 9/22/2016 9:44:21 PM
...that's a lot of alts. x_x
And that's really quite soon. It seems this year, there's several old members going to collage.
Not jealous. I'm glad I don't get anything at all. X3
I'm taller then you. ^_^ :D
Weight lifting? What's your limit?
Sadly, I have not read any of those books.
And nonfiction is not a subject I like very much. >_<
Piano and trumpet are fun to play. ^_^
Would this be a normal welcome or a rewelcome? I mean, you're being welcomed again, but I wasn't here for the first one.
[SITE] Temporary Bans on 9/20/2016 12:26:14 AM
So, it was talked about before in admin shakeup how something between the nuke of a banning and the feather duster of point deductions was needed. I believe this would be good.
A Song Composed by the Internet on 9/19/2016 10:27:58 AM
That's actually pretty cool. :D