Reanimation 2

Not bad, certainly not the worst. Very much better than the first one.

The biggest problem in your last one was most likely the random deaths, but it seems you've got that covered here. The deaths are a lot better explained, and it isn't like every second choice you make leads to death. And that's great. Although the deaths are a bit cleaned up, they are still a problem, but now a minor one. An example we could see of this would be when Frank gets mauled by the Behemoth, there was only one good choice... out of, about, five I believe. You could've polished that up a bit and made some more branches, leading to some more choices/deaths/endings... as in good endings, non-death ones.

Another thing I liked about this storygame was the items usage, how you could use a knife or gun. They don't have pictures, however, which is something you could add onto. Also, and forgive me if I'm wrong, but at several points in the storygame, it gives you the choice of "If you don't have enough ammo, do this," or it may imply that you could lose or not have enough ammo, like if you use your knife, for instance, it would say "Right, use your knife, that way you won't waste any ammo,". I played this entire storygame and actually got two endings, but I never really reached a point where I lost ammo before! Maybe I've just not played the entire thing to its full extent, but I really don't think you can ever loose ammo. If it is the case that you can loose ammo, telling the reader how much of the stuff they have would be a great thing.

In many more ways than one, this was a lot better than your first one. The plot idea was new, of you being in a team of mercenaries. Personally, I liked Reanimation Part 1's plot better, but still, this was the obvious winner between the to. The way you reshaped it from Part 1 was the best part about it.

Unlike a lot of storygames I've played, this didn't have a lot of problems that I thought it would have from the first one, or general problems that a lot of people would usually have. There are only some minor problems I could tell you, but even then those don't really distract the reader or make this story less engaging. I would suggest to maybe add more text to the pages. You detail and description almost all the pages,... except for the ones you died. Usually the "You Died" pages consist of only 1-2 words, which shouldn't be considering the amount of description that are on the pages when you are alive. Adding some more sentences would be better.

Another thing would be sort of-ish the logistics of the story, these are things that kind of lack logic and maybe sort of random. Some finer revisions would clear this up. My first example would be the two distinctive paths you reach, at the point where you can either look for the Behemoth, look for Hank or look for the bionic weapon. If you choose the bionic weapon path, you eventually find Hank, and if you take his grenade, you get the Selfish ending? If you go back and throw it, the Behemoth somehow lives and kills you, where as if you don't back up you kill him to get the Selfish ending? Keep in mind that these choices are exactly the same with the Look-For-Hank path. However, when you grab his grenade, you somehow get a Heroic ending. I would suggest you clear this up with some revisions, and also, make the respective paths unique!

Going with this, were sometimes the choices. One particular event that crossed my mind would be when you learn where the Behemoth's Reanimator is. But it doesn't tell you, and you are basically just clicking links down the list until you get it.

There were some grammatical errors. Nothing too big or eye-catching, just mispelled words. Also, (and this occurs sometimes a lot in your stories) the perspective changes around a lot. One minute its third-person, and the narrator refers to you as, well, "You". Then, in the next page, its first-person, the narrator is you, and you refer to yourself as "I". And then it jumps back.

This story, overall, was great! The plot was pretty interesting, and like many, I really did enjoy it. Nothing I've seen so far. I just think you should go back, make some final revisions and also proofread it, and you should be set for a great story!

5/8. Not the best, not the worst. Very fun.

I FINALLY GOT THE CHUCK NORRIS ENDING!!!! AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!

It's very difficult

In case of behemoth,call Chuck Norris.

Very good story, however, grammar and spelling could be improved.

I got the sacrificial ending again! I much preferred this one to the first Reanimation story. It was a lot more detailed, and I liked the fact I could use items to shoot the Behemoth.

very good improvement upon the first one

I feel like there could have been more choices that didn't lead to immediate death. Also when you do die the explanations were very short. I loved the general storyline though!

Not bad, short though

Not bad, I got the "Chuck Norris Ending", although I don't see what a film star has to do with it.