The Apartment

Player Rating1.84/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 22 ratings since
played times (finished )

Story Difficulty1/8

"no possible way to lose"

Play Length1/8

"Make sure not to blink"

Maturity Level7/8

"anything goes"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 18. If this were a movie, it would probably be R.

Tags

Horror

Your a 19 year old male who is under some pressure due to know noise's you hear coming from your house. Considering the events that have transpired so far your are left with two options. Consider them wisely for each one has a chance to end in the some way. 

 

 (Please put suggestions and ideas in either comments or send me a message, I am not sure about the work shop I feel like not as many people see it. So feel free anything in the comments)

Player Comments

This game was pretty short, and I was killed by IT? He was in my cabinet? Mind=Blown.
5/8
-- ZagHero on 1/16/2016 1:31:53 AM with a score of 0
As others mentioned too short, and only make parts for self contained stories / when you really need to.

You could have asked in workshop to have others see how your writing is coming along and enabling sneak preview, if you wanted feedback.

But the story itself definitely seems interesting, hoping you make part two a LOT longer.

As a potential idea, maybe add lots of detail to every page? That would add to the total read time and let you control the story more. But seeing as *SPOILER* IT makes me use my imagination, you might not want to do this.

So keep writing! Just make the second part longer.
-- Zake on 1/14/2016 1:40:34 AM with a score of 0
Like Briar says when the author warns the reader to avoid bad comments you know their story is going to make any enthusiastic critic's day in the same way some parents bound home from work in the evenings to spank children for their transgressions.

Having said that there is not actually too much here to criticize: you used choices, the writing had atmosphere (though on some pages it could have been a bit longer) and the story was reasonably interesting. Yes you shouldn't publish in parts but that's because most writers who lack the discipline to write more than 30 or 40 pages for a story and call it "part 1" rarely make it as far as part 2. It's nice to get proven wrong and read a lengthy and mind-blowing sequel once in a while...

I don't think apart from a few spelling errors (one of the links said deide instead of decide) there's anything wrong with the quality of the writing, it's just lacking in quantity.
-- Will11 on 1/13/2016 7:06:11 PM with a score of 0
This wasn't a game. This wasn't even part of a game. This was part of part of a game. I made one choice, and then clicked on two links, and that was it. I understand that sometimes releasing multiple stories works, but that's when the stories are self-contained, like with Homo Perfectus. You should never release it in such tiny chapters. If you don't have the patience to do it all together, you won't have the patience to ever finish this.
-- Steve24833 on 1/13/2016 7:01:04 PM with a score of 0
When the writer needs to use the blurb to tell people not to insult his story, you know not to get your hopes up >.<
-- Briar_Rose on 1/13/2016 5:33:15 PM with a score of 0
Says please don't realease your story's in segments... Creates this
-- BanditSparky on 1/13/2016 4:38:39 PM with a score of 0
The story is incomplete. Please do not release your story in segments - the community frowns upon that.
-- Bucky on 1/13/2016 3:48:47 PM with a score of 0
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