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Escape the Dark Sector 2 - Team Alpha

You have no idea how long you’ve been out of it, but it feels like forever.

You can’t believe this happened AGAIN.

Last thing you remember is coordinating with other Galactic Alliance ships for Operation Lightbringer to put an end to the space station of degenerates that you and your only other teammate escaped from over a year ago.

Took you months to convince GA High Command to DO something about the station, but those pencil pushers did shit all except tell you that warning satellites would be placed around the DARK SECTOR informing other ships not to enter it and “gathering intel”. The outlaw station was not considered a high priority since it was out of GA territory and there were other important matters on the agenda.

Meanwhile you were keeping up on reports about more disappearances in areas surrounding that part of space. Eventually weird anomalies started becoming common such as rifts in the space/time continuum. Wasn’t until an entire outer colony on a nearby planet was GONE without a trace that the GA finally started to pay attention to what the hell you were saying all this time.

For all the good it did. They decided that a full scale invasion fleet wouldn’t be necessary. They sent you and only a handful of other ships to take care of the situation, believing that it would be more than sufficient to put down a station full of miscreants. To make matters worse, it was mostly the alien arm of the GA that was sent with you. 

You’ve never trusted the filthy xenos completely.

You didn’t even get close to the station before you were intercepted by several ships. In fact, there wasn’t even that much of a ship battle before all the GA ships were hit by something that completely knocked out most of their power and once again several heavily armored beings materialized before you and everything went black.

Right now you don’t even know where you are due to a tight blindfold around your eyes covering your sight completely. You can’t speak due to something binding your mouth. Your hands are also tied behind your back and no amount of effort will get them loose. You can’t move very far anyway since something is around your neck and presumably chained to a wall.

But you got a good idea where you’re going…

The only sense you do have is your hearing. The faint rumble of an engine tells you that you’re currently on a ship and you’re definitely sure it isn’t yours.

You also hear the occasional movement wherever you are. Someone or possibly someones are in here with you, but so far you don’t hear anyone speak and the movement is more of a struggling sound rather than walking about. Once again you weren’t the only survivor.

You then hear the sound of a door opening and several boots marching closer.

“Is this all that survived?” someone asks.
“Yes.” another voice answers.
“(Sigh) Hoping for more captives, considering most of their ships were blown to shit so we don’t even have those except mostly for scrap.”
“The mutants sort of went on a rampage sir.”
“Yeah, yeah, always the fucking mutants and their bloodthirsty ways. Oh well, it is what it is. I suppose at least we didn’t have to go very far. I also see we got quite the mix of species this time at least…what the fuck is that thing?”
“Some sort of android I think. ”
“Interesting. Well get all these fuckers up and march them over to the observation deck to take their blindfolds off.”
“What for sir?”
“You ask that all the fucking time, you know damn well why! I like the new captives to see where they’re going to be spending the rest of their short existence. Really gives them a sense of hopelessness!”

You are suddenly grabbed roughly and after your neck is unchained, you are forcibly moved in the direction of wherever the observation deck is.

Eventually you are stopped and someone removes your blindfold. You already know what you’re going to see…

Yep, still looks imposing.

Besides several armored guards, you look around and see at least eight of your fellow crew members with you. You’re all going to the same fate and given what you went through last time you know it won’t be good.

“Hahaha! You see that? THAT’S where you’re going to be FOREVER! Don’t worry though, most of you probably won’t live nowhere near that long.” one of the guards mocks. (You get the feeling this is the exact same asshole who captured you last time. He doesn’t seem to recognize or remember you though)

“Alright, I’ve had my giggles, let’s get this lot into the detention level. You know how the master likes everyone to be punctual.”

And with that the blindfolds are put back on to cover your eyes and you’re eventually marched off the ship and into the station. You don’t know how many turns and corridors you walk down, but you couldn’t memorize it if you tried. (And you definitely attempt it)

At some point you hear your captors talking about diving you up and taking you to different cellblocks. You also hear someone mention where the one surviving GA ship was taken.

Eventually the blindfold comes off again, you’re untied and thrown into a cell with two of your fellow crew members. 

“Here we are again.”

“Yep. Well with one addition.”

“Click. Ba-back back up p-p-power on. Bleep.”

“That thing is really fucking creepy, but at least it’s not an alien.”

Similar cell as last time. And once again time passes for who knows how long. It’s like these reprobates forget all about who they even capture. Nourishment is beamed into the room, which has to be on some sort of automatic timer.

Your continued efforts to break out unfortunately aren’t as successful this time. Even with an android around, you cannot get the door open. You can only guess they secured their cells better after the last escape. (Who knows, maybe they DO remember you) 

Having little else to do, you once again close your eyes to rest for the next attempt…

Well one good thing, this place is still as lethal to its own people as it is to its captives.

As this part of the station is seemingly falling down around you, you manage to grab three weapons from the guard post. Two slug pistols (Ballistic) and a ray gun (Energy). Divide these weapons how you wish.

Each member can either leave now or they can continue to search the guard post for more items, but it’s a risk since the ceiling is collapsing. 

Make your choice and decide who is going to take point for the next encounter.

"Ah, shit. Here we go again." 

Cook grabs a slug pistol, racks the slide, and points it against the wall. Sideways. 

He takes point for the next encounter, deciding not to risk getting crushed by the ceiling. 

"Acquiring weapon."

K-100 announced in monotone as their metallic hands took hold of the ray gun.

They decide to leave the area. The structural integrity of the part of this station they seemed to be in had much to be desired. None of the calculations that were coming up in the forefront of the cyborg’s processing were outweighing the potential risks, for whatever reward might be able to be found.

Thus, the robotic figure follows from a respectable distance, the human that decided to take point.

"I was ALREADY too old for this shit the last time!"

Abbot takes the remaining pistol, but lingers to see if he can loot anything useful off the crushed guard.

Like old times

Determined to beat the odds of not dying first as always, Cook picked up a weapon and got his black ass out of danger immediately. K-100 did like wise since it seemed to be the logical thing to do.

Abbot on the other hand was too old to start running suddenly. Besides there might be more useful shit to find and it was just a little debris falling anyway.

Abbot continued to look for more loot, but only succeed in finding a pack of Stale Rations. He then was struck pretty hard on the head by some of that not so little falling debris before he was able to get out of the danger zone. (Lose 1 HP)

When he finally caught up with Cook and K, he found Cook cautiously looking around the corner.

"Wow, they really did up security from last time."

Alright, nominate someone to try to slip past the camera and hack the turret. This is going to require passing a Cunning test in one attempt and then a Wisdom test in 2 attempts.

If you fail, well you're going into combat and all that entails.

Make your choice

"Man, let's let the robot handle this shit," Cook says. "We've been on this ship for forty-five minutes, which makes me feel like I'm in severe danger of being killed." 

Abbot shows up carrying a pack of stale crackers somewhat less then triumphantly, pressing a bloody rag to his head and grimacing. He sees the turret and immediately agrees with Cook.

"Having an expendable robot along this time is the only good thing about this situation if you ask me."

Upon being nominated unanimously by the party of three that they were in, the android steps up to face down the camera and turret security combination.

"Commencing operation."

K-100 then moves forward in an attempt to successfully accomplish this next task that's been presented to them.

Buffering...

What seemed to be a good idea of letting machinery handle tasks to prevent the loss of more important human lives, had one major flaw, which was this machinery was still made by humans and thus subject to error.

In this case K-100 froze up almost immediately after being given the task allowing the camera to detect its movement causing the turret to open fire on ALL of you.

The turret is more vulnerable to energy weapons.

Make your combat choices

"Re-rebooting. Combat mode engaged."

K-100, seeing as they were the only one with an energy-based weapon, they produce said weapon immediately.

The cyborg then attempts to fire back at the turret with the ray gun they now wielded.

Cook pulls out the 9 and opens fire. 

"Damn useless piece of junk, " he swears, pulling out his pistol. It's not quite clear if he means the android or the turret, but he does start shooting at the latter.

Shot to shit

After a quick but painful shoot out with the automated turret, it was eventually disabled permanently by the sentry drone activated by K-100.

While Cook and Abbot both took a breather, K-100 went into standby mode. While resting a bit, Abbot noticed a nearby maintenance room. Upon a quick search, a chrono-bomb, along with a portable force field was found.

Taking the loot, the group soon moved on.

Chrono-bomb (Can be used to reroll any number and any sort of dice)

Force Field (Can be discarded to prevent any number of HP loss)

Divide the equipment how you wish and pick who is taking point next encounter

"Threat eliminated." K-100 says amongst the billowing smoke of the destroyed machine.

K-100 then decides to take the Force Field upon spotting, analyzing, and calculating how the piece of high-tech equipment will best serve the android in their mission.

Beep Boop.

Cook grabs the Chrono-Bomb. The meatplasteel shield will make better use of the forcefield, anyway. Speaking of being a meatshield, he plants his foot on K-100's metal ass and unceremoniusly shoves the robot into taking point in the next encounter. 

Did we take any damage?

"I think the Kay One Thousands have force fields built in already. Back in my day, these older models kept getting lost to botched bomb and turret defusions. Glad this one is holding up so far....just wish it did a better job blocking bullets," Abbot says, limping along in the rear.

He opens the ration packet carefully so that Cook can't hear the wrapper crinkle and eats it.

Current status for Team Alpha

Abbot

7 HP

Carrying

Slug pistol (Ballistic)

Stale rations (Heals 1 HP)

Cook

8 HP

Carrying

Slug pistol (Ballistic)

Chrono-bomb

K-100

8 HP

Carrying

Ray Gun

Force Field

Life Support Module

Prison Break!

Abbot and Cook followed K-100 who move along the corridor at a normal speed.

Things were surprisingly uneventful for awhile until some shouting and shooting is heard.

"AHAHAHAHAHA! EAT MY ASS, YOU DEGENERATE DICKHEADS!"

One of the shots meant for this old man hits K-100 who looks down at its chest plate which would have taken damage, but instead was protected by the newly acquired forcefield (Now used up) causing the shot to bounce of harmlessly.

The old man is also dropping a shitload of items as he runs. Apparently he's stolen a bunch of stuff while escaping as well.

You can either let this old guy through and run along with him or attack his pursuers.

Make your choice

"It would perhaps be more optimal to allow this crazed elderly man through, than to attack the unknown quantity of pursuers he has."

K-100 suggests, watching as the the recently acquired Force Field hit the ground. 

It didn’t take long for the technology to make its value known it seemed. They would have to file that information away.

Instantly, Cook flattens himself against the wall, hands outstretched to the sky. "I don't know this man, officers! Also, I'm married... to a white woman, and uh... yeah, I'm an attentive father! So no need to start shooting." 

Abbot (who should be at 8hp now I believe) wants that shit load of items. But if the rest of the group joins the old man he'll follow rather than getting left to ambush the pursuers alone.

100 Miles and Running

Not wishing to potentially run into a platoon of guards, the team decided to run in the direction of the old man as more laser fire narrowly missed them.

As they ran, Cook had a flash back to his youth growing up in New Compton so he was used to this and easily kept the pace, though he was more surprised that the old man was still ahead of him. The old fucker must be on space coke or something.

Abbot and K-100 followed behind, though Abbot was barely faster than the android thanks to being full of old wounds from battles long ago. He just hoped that he'd get out of this again so he could finally retire like he'd originally planned to the FIRST time this happened.

K-100 simply judged just the right amount of speed and pressure to place upon the servos to not strain this unit's shell while still managing to outrun the current assailants.

Eventually after countless corridors and twists and turns, the old man stops and pulls out some strange looking device from his jacket.

"Finally recharged, get outta the way folks, you really don't want this to hit you!" he says and fires it at the first guard turning the corner.

You aren't even sure what the hell happens next, but a large wave from the device warps the entire hallway and everything in it. You see the couple of unfortunate guards caught in it just explode. The corridor itself twists in such a way that nobody is going to even pass through it.

"Fuck, that was the last charge. Oh well." the old man says tossing the burnt out device on the floor. He then turns to you.

"You lot look like you're GA. Well you two do, the other one looks like one of those old sexbots. Didn't know they were even still making those creepy things. Anyway, I expect you're trying to get off this dump, habitation area is in that direction, I'm heading elsewhere though, I still got some unfinished business. But here you go, maybe it'll help."

The old man hands you some power stims (You may discard this item to change your crew die result to a might result during an encounter) which might explain why he was able to run so fast. He then walks off in the opposite direction he pointed you in.

Pass this equipment to whoever (K-100's inventory is currently full) and pick who is taking point next

"God speed you crazy old bastard," Abbot salutes the man as he walks off. And he'll offer Cook the power stims. "Here, drugs look more like your thing." Abbot privately assumes that the younger, more ethnic man will shoot them up immediately and then leave dirty needles lying around for pursuers to step on.

"Well, you heard him. We're headed that way." He gestures the android ahead, extra careful not to touch it now that he's heard this new theory of the unsavory things it might have been used for.

"Stop making me take point, you faggots."

Abbot should go, as he is old and the closest one to dying anyway due to his advanced age and faggotry. 

Abbot frowns at the insult and exchanges glances with Cook. "Great! Now it's malfunctioning! Well I'm sure not letting an unstable robot walk behind me."

A thought seems to occur to him.

"Unless.... could the insults be one of the sexbot settings, for subby twinks who are into that?" He visibly starts to sweat. "Well I'm sure not letting an aggressive gay robot walk behind me."

"Hey Abbot, I think the robot said it wants to take point," Cook says, nominating the robot to take point once again. 

Dark Sector: Become Human

K-100 felt the push of Cook and Abbot once again and suddenly memories began flooding through HER neuronet…

“Come on you stupid sexbot, you’re supposed to put out! You’re not dressed up in a fucking wig and rubber skin just to look pretty, now let’s get to it!”
“Fuck this Clyde, just hold it down for me! Arghhhh! Shit! Help!”

“BUZZ….ERROR…HOSTILE! HOSTILE! RAPE DEFENSE MODE ENGAGED!”

Cook suddenly felt the force of solid steel hitting his face and flooring him. (Lose 1 HP)
Abbot intervened landing a hit on K-100, but his follow up was less successful and he too went down with a piece of metal to the face. (Both lose 1 HP)

K-100 stood over the two humans exclaiming “This unit is not a sexbot! This unit…this unit…I…I…I am free!”

K-100’s chips and circuits were working overtime as various locked out memories, new and old popped up. K-100 had to process and get out of immediate danger.

Cook and Abbot both fired at K-100 as she ran down the corridor that old man had previously taken, but they both missed. The android was gone.

The pair stood up cursing their situation.

Well, pick who is going to take point now.

Cook rubs his bleeding nose. "I'm gonna be real with you man, I was definitely gonna fuck the sexbot. I'll take point, I guess." 

As he sets off, he continues. "Like, the Vegas odds of me not fucking the sexbot were so slim as to be nonexistent. Like, Zippy Chippy versus Secretariat type situation, you know? Muhammad Ali 1980 vs. Muhammad Ali 2020. Those were the odds of that robot going unraped on the ride home."

Lmao.

(Oh no, what do I do now?)

Abbot's mustache bristles at this outburst and he takes a moment to stop the bleeding as he stares in bewilderment after the fleeing bot. "Now who would program a rape protection mode into a sexbot? That's like putting bread repellant in a toaster!"

Back to basics

With the loss of their rebellious toaster, Cook and Abbot moved on as escape was still the top priority not worrying about GA "property."

Cook took point and continued along the corridor. Things were uneventful until the lights above started getting dimmer and then flicker...

"SURPRISE NIGGA!"

Cook feels the mutant's claws sink into his flesh. (Lose 1 HP)

You can either try to just get away from this mutant guard or attack.

Make your choice

"Get off me you nasty fuckin' butt pirate! I'm not going out like Eazy!" Cook says, backing up and opening fire. He will use the Chrono Bomb to re roll if necessary. 

"Damn it Cook, why'd you invite your Space Tinder date along?!"

Abbot opens fire on the mutant reverse rapist.

Swipe left, right, left, right, you’re toothless!

Abbot and Cook both blasted the mutant full of holes causing it to stumble back, but somehow this still wasn’t enough to fell the thing. It attempted to clumsily fire back, but Cook’s chronobomb allowed them to bullet time that shit like it was the fucking matrix.

Looking at each other, the two nodded and went straight for an old fashioned beatdown rather than wasting time reloading. Abbot went high and Cook went low just wailing on this mutant asshole’s gnarled potato sack. 

Meanwhile Abbot punched it in the face, but without the desired effect of it doing much damage to its ugly mug. Feeling worn out from this ordeal already, Abbot said fuck it and just injected himself with the power stim, giving himself the strength comparable to that of a short bus full special students.

One punch was then all it took for Abbot to explode the mutant’s head like that scene in that one movie. (Pick one, there’s a lot of them)

Hot, sweating,and covered in blood, it was apparent that ebony and ivory weren’t out of this game yet.

Looking around, the two noticed the nearby guard post and found some heavy ordinance that they were really glad the guard hadn’t decided to use.

Namely a battle rifle (Ballistic, 2 handed, up to 2 shots per combat round)

And a battery cannon (Ballistic, 2 handed, up to 3 shots per combat round)

Divide the weapons as you see fit and decide who is taking point next

"Oh I know what the ladies LIKE!" Cook says picking up the cannon and suddenly transforming into a different black stereotype. He has a moustache and a cigar now. He racks the slide meaningfully. 

Abbot smugly wipes the gore off his hand and picks up the rifle, cocking it like a shotgun. (because this specific model works that way). He tucks the pistol in his belt, produces his own cigar and along with the mustache he's had all along poses triumphantly next to Cook for a moment while their theme music plays in the background.

What are current hitpoints? Whoever has more should take point.

Cook has 6 and Abbot has 7

The new, smugger and more confident Abbot is happy to go first.

Cook certainly felt more confident with his new weapon...

Abbot was feeling confident too...

There really could be no more perfect choice. Even if it comes to the worst, Abbot will die happy knowing the holo movies about his last stand will star the Sellek AI.

LOCKDOWN

Feeling more sure about their chances, Abbot took the lead, heading for what looked to be the exit out of the detention area at last. He was surprised there weren't any guards around, but he wasn't going to question it.

The duo got to the doors...

DETENTION LEVEL LOCKED DOWN. ALL ESCAPEES PLEASE REMAIN WHERE YOU ARE TO RECEIVE IMMEDIATE EXECUTION. THANK YOU AND HAVE A NICE DAY.

Pick a crew member to hack the door. They have to roll two wisdom in two attempts.

Make your choice

"Y'know, I worked as a guard in a max security facility a couple of years. They didn't execute escapees though, they just had the AI bribe them with cake. I bet the locking mechanisms are the same though, just gotta know the trick to it."

Abbot calmly starts slamming the panel with the heel of his palm. "Fuck you, door! Open up!"

Open Sez Me

No sooner had Abbot performed his "door trick" that it opened up right away. He couldn't believe that actually worked, though he just turned to Cook looking smug as if there never was any doubt.

The pair of them dashed through the doors and down another corridor and then to a more open and crowded area. They knew where they both were, this was the heart of the station. They'd both been here before and while they were glad they were out of the detention area, they also knew it was only going to get more dangerous from here.

Pick someone to take point for the next encounter.

Cook hefts his big black battery cannon and takes point. 

Food Court

The team moved through the the crowds with mild revulsion as there were far too many aliens around. All presumably going about their various criminal and degenerate activities.

And this is what the Galactic Alliance wants to become, a cultural melting pot of these savage races. All in the name of "diversity."

It was just plan fucktardery, that's what it was.

Soon the team saw an area where more humans were gathered. Probably degenerates as well, but at least they smelled better. In fact something was smelling pretty good from that direction. It was a food court.

"Earth noodles round eyes! Very good! Why you no have creds? This no neocommie faggotry! Ammo then! You pay now!"

You only have ballistic weapons, but you've got a lot of ammo for them. Each one will heal 1 HP

Abbot has 3 ammo (1 for the pistol and 2 for the rifle)

Cook has 4 ammo (1 for the pistol and 3 for the cannon)

Spend as much as you want, but completely unloading a weapon makes it unusable for the very next encounter until you reload it again (after which it will work as normal)

Make your choice

Despite the hygiene concerns, Abbot has worked up a powerful appetite, and who knows when a good human-cooked meal will be available again?

He'll take three helpings of noodles please.

"Hang on, I picked up some Chinese while I was with the CIA in Space Vietnam." Cook orders a serving of noodles and pays with his pistol ammo. 

Down time

Cook and Abbot sat down to eat their noodles and take mild rest from their escape attempt.

Cook watched Abbot devour the noodles that were three times the size of his own portion. The old guy must have really been hungry.

Cook himself might have ordered more, but he still had bad memories of a noodle incident back when he was stationed in Space Vietnam. It started out as normal R&R and then it was a bloodbath. Half his squad was cut down, there were dead ladyboys everywhere and some nutter in a dark helmet was just mowing down innocent civilians and setting them on fire, laughing the whole time.

Cook still remembered seeing a scared young boy hiding behind a pile of garbage with presumably the top half of his mother laying nearby. Never did figure out who's side that guy was on.

While Cook was thinking about this old event, a series of loud explosions in the distance snapped him out of it causing him to immediately duck under the table. Abbot was already there. (Having his own PTSD moment)

The pair of them overheard someone shouting about a fight going on in the medical bay and being destroyed. From under the table, Team Alpha saw a few security types heading in that direction, though they were taking their time about it.

Seeing which way they were going, Abbot and Cook decided to go in a different direction and quickly moved on from the food court.

Another squad of security turned the corner heading in their direction and that's when the pair ducked into one of the nearby stores...

"Ugh, your scent is offensive. Doesn't your race ever bathe?"

Rudeness aside, you can still try to talk your way into the guild. This is going to require a double cunning roll or the die face with their name on it in one attempt.

(Just so you know, only Cook has a double cunning result on his die. Both of course have their name on one their die results.)

Of course you could just leave.

Make your choice

Cook will attempt to charm this serpent... lady? 

"Hey now, lil' mama. I'm gonna assume you meant the human race by that comment," he tries to smile disarmingly. 

Black Snake Moan

"Of course I was talking about humans, what else would I be referring to? And you still haven't told me who the hell you even are."

"Just making sure. Anyway, the name's Cook, remember it, because you'll be screaming it later."

"EXCUSE ME?"

At this point the snake lady gave a hiss, believing she was being threatened with violence.

"No, no, no need for that my coiled cutey. I'm just saying I got a snake of my own that I think you'd like to meet."

"Wait, are you seriously hitting on me? Hah! That's funny. Even if I were interested, which I'm not, you couldn't handle me human."

At this point Abbot took his leave. He'd seen Cook do this before. Never seen it fail either. Didn't understand it himself, but he figured it might be awhile so he sat down on the sofa and watched the entertainment monitor that was nearby.

A few minutes passed and Abbot heard the snake lady giggling.

Another ten and Abbot saw Cook and snake lady walking off to a nearby door and enter it.

Abbot drifted off watching some game on the monitor.

Later...

"Hey Abbot!"

Abbot hated that.

Cook excitedly told Abbot that he got access to the guild saying that they just gave him a selection of cool shit to pick from. Abbot rubbed his eyes and followed Cook to see what this cool shit was.

Cook first showed him a selection of medical supplies

Nutri-Pill (Heal 2 HP)

Multi-Stim (Can discard to change your crew die roll to any result)

"Well those would be pretty useful."

Cook then showed him a selection of weapons

Flamethrower (Fire, 3 shots, two handed, cannot be reloaded, ignores any resistances)

Rusty Pipe (Once per close combat round you can roll again if you miss)

"Why the hell is a rusty pipe an exclusive item? We probably could have just ripped one out of the walls around here!"

"Alright, they can't all be winners, but check THIS shit out!"

Cook then walked over to something large covered with a tarp. Cook ripped the tarp off to reveal the pride of his abilities to sex up snake lady (Who apparently was curled up asleep in a nearby corner)

Old Demolition Mech

Takes up 4 inventory slots, meaning you can't carry anything else since you're actually piloting the mech. You can't take cover or activate your drone either.

It's armed with a demolition cannon which has 2 explosive shots. This weapon will never "backfire" (causing damage to you) though it can still jam. Once the two shots are fired, it can't be reloaded.

It's also armed with a wrecking ball fist. This allows you to inflict one more wound whenever you land a successful hit in close combat.

Whenever you take damage, the mech takes the damage instead. The mech has 4 HP and can't be healed. Upon losing the last one, if you're still in the mech, you lose 2 HP in addition to how many caused the mech to explode.

You can of course eject from the mech at anytime before it gets to that point.

"Nice. Well I can't say I approve of your miscegenation, but I guess your dick came through for us."

"Got me through high school."

You can keep (or use) up to three of these items.

Abbot and Cook both have one inventory slot open.

Make your choices and pick who is taking point next encounter

How are these fuckers so lucky?

Having regrets?

No. You two would have just kept making me take point to start all the confrontations, and when I reached low HP you two would probably start just taking cover in combat so I could die faster.

Holy shit.

Aesthetically I feel like the mech is the only possible choice, but it does have its downsides and the other options are so good.

Abbot is at 10hp?

I think Malk and I may need to discuss this, but if we don't go with the mech, Cook I'm guessing will want the flamethrower, so Abbot will discard the pistol and take the multi stim and the rusty pipe. Lame as it is, he should be using his close combat ability more often.

...actually, I suppose Abbot could discard the empty rifle as well, take the pipe for himself, and hold onto either the flamethrower or cannon until Malk is done with the mech. With room still left over for one of the other items. We will win this game using teamwork, a human concept the alien scum can't understand.

Could Malk eat the healing pill on the spot and still have that inventory slot free?

If you took the multi-stim, the flame thrower, the rusty pipe, the mech and ate the pill, that would be taking all five items. You can only take 3 of them (Or 2 and eat the pill)

Whoops, I skimmed over the "up to three" part, I was just thinking of inventory slots. But I'll wait until Malk and I can talk it over.

How the hell does this keep happening to them

All right. Abbot tosses his rifle and pistol aside while Cook hotwires the mech. He looks regretfully at the flamethrower, but once he realizes how little fuel it holds he will take the discarded battle cannon instead. "Three pumps might be enough for some weird snake lady, but I prefer to have a weapon that reloads."

He also gives the rusty pipe a little twirl and tucks it in his belt. Ready to savagely beat any degenerate thugs and gun down any who run, it's just like his days on the force--in the movie they're going to make about him starring the Selleck AI.


Edit: and take the healing pill, Abbot has a feeling Cook may need it if the mech gets totaled while he's still inside it.

Having fucked his way into a high-tech battlesuit, Cook reasons that it's only fair that he takes point. 

Fight the Power!

Abbot and Cook in his new mini-mech were soon on their way.

Oddly they didn't capture as much attention walking down the promenade as one might think given that it was a demolition mech and they looked like they might be station maintenance workers anyway thanks to their toxic masculine appearance.

Of course they weren't the only unusual sight or event going on in this big station. Loud explosions and gunfire were heard, along with a bunch of shouting...

"OFF THE FUCKING SPACE PIGS MY BROTHAS! POWER TO THE PEOPLE!"

You can either leave while station security is preoccupied or help out the underground resistance.

Make your choice

Are these freedom fighters human? That main guy in the picture sure doesn't look it.

I think he's wearing a balaclava and goggles. 

Remembering that their mission was to pacify the station, as well as always wanting an opportunity to smoke the pigs that keep brothers everywhere down, Cook opens fire on the security guards with his demolition cannon. 

Abbot will shrug and do likewise with the battle cannon. "Guess we can't really pick our allies..." Normally he'd be loathe to involve himself in the affairs of dirty aliens, but, desperate times. If Cook had put his entire dick in an alien, Abbot could help shoot some guards for them. There at least seemed little risk involved with the kind of weaponry they were packing.

Fuck Tha Space Police

The shoot out with station security wasn't so much of a shoot out as it was a massacre. Cook unleashed the demolition cannon and wiped out most of them with the barrage.

Abbot's attempt wasn't as spectacular as the weapon jammed giving the remaining pig a chance to fire back with his own heavy ordinance. A rocket was launched devastating the area and killing several of the resistance members. Abbot himself was showered by shrapnel (Lose 2 HP) and both legs of Cook's mech were damaged (Mech has 2 HP remaining)

With the resistance now in flight and the lone cop desperately trying to reload, it was up to Team Alpha to finish this fight and they weren't about to let this pig get off another shot.

Abbot ran towards the cop with the rusty pipe in hand to bash his brains out. The cop dodged, then he dodged again and then again.

Cook by this time had managed to get the mech there and shouted to Abbot to get out of the way as he crushed the cop with his wrecking ball.

Abbot slowly got up from where he ducked for cover and just shook his head saying his usual line that he was really getting too old for this shit.

In any case, another battle was won, and it was time to look for any salvageable loot.

The only things that were found of use however were some unmarked pills (Heal 1 HP) and a Chrono-rig on one of the cops. (2 inventory spaces, allows you to re-roll any type of die once per encounter)

Divide what you can and pick who takes point next turn

Cook ignores the mech's flashing warnings and readouts as he raises a giant metal gauntlet in a one-fist salute. 

"Man, you should grab that chrono-rig and take point. We need this mech's firepower to get off this jive-ass station." 

Funny you should mention the warnings since that's exactly what's on the flipped mech damaged side of the cards.

 

(You're also out of ammo)

"Slippery little bastard," Abbot grumbles, looking down at the corpse and putting his pipe away.

He frowns at the smoking mech, its cannons visibly damaged. "Cook, that thing is done. Last thing I want is more shrapnel, get down from there before it explodes."

"Take your cannon back, take those pills, and I'll use the rig and take point, I can't carry this much shit anyway."

Cook wil dismount and swallow the health pills, as well as accepting the canon. "Good call -- if some psychotic robo-skank were to roll up on us, I would want to be as tactically effective as possible." 

Is Cook eating the nutripill that they got from snake lady too?

I think miz ate one, and I had another. 

"Imagine something as crazy as that happening, even here," Abbot chuckles good naturedly. He hands over the cannon and the Nutri Pill, then uses the pain pills for himself before tugging on the Chrono-Rig. "Ahhh, haven't used one of these since training at the Academy. They've gotten fancier...and heavier. All the better to bust a crazed robo-skank in the face with I guess."

Abbot and Cook should both be at 9hp now.

I assume I can just trust End to use the Chrono-Rig and the close combat reroll as effectively as possibly as Abbot takes point. Since I'm still not reading the rules.


(It's so hard not to type Abbot and Costello...)

Yep, you're both at 9 now.

I'll start writing up the next encounter.

Doing the Time Warp

Abbot and Cook noticed the crowds were thinning out which could only mean that they were getting closer to the Forgotten Zone of the station which they already knew was going to be a meat grinder hence all the pill popping ahead of time.

They also both heard the rantings of a certain android that left their team so long ago. (Especially since she mentioned them specifically by name) While they hadn't given much thought about it since it left, they were a little surprised it was still operational.

No matter, they would be prepared for the malfunctioning robo-whore if she made good on her threats.

The station lighting started to get dimmer and it probably wouldn't be long before they were moving in parts of the station that were in complete darkness.

However, they passed an area which had quite a bit of light coming from it. Multiple colors in fact. At the risk of peeping in on a degenerate alien disco, they still took a look anyway...

It's just a jump to the left...

You can decide to go through it in an attempt to travel faster to your destination, but of course messing about with time and space is always tricky so you can always just move on and go the old fashioned way.

Make your choice

"Damn. That creepy sex bot's really blown a fuse. Glad it left before it did any real damage."

Abbot stops and peers nervously into the room, then steps back with relief. "Oh thank God, I was afraid there'd be some kind of alien orgy going on in here. Looks like some weird alien shit I'd rather not mess with either way, but at least this way we save our sanity, and ammo."

Unless Cook REALLY wants to go through the portal (and we knows he does like to enter the occasional alien hole when it's for a good cause) Abbot will take point again and continue on.

Cook shakes his head. "I'm done with alien hole." 

Roach Patrol

Abbot and Cook both decided that fucking with time and space was not what they wanted to add to the list of shit they were in right now.

They proceeded on and sure enough the station's lighting was now dimmer, more empty, colder, and even a little more sinister now if such a thing were possible in this place. The duo prepared themselves, because literally ANYTHING could be lurking in the darkness.

As it happened though, what was coming wasn't lurking, but instead coming straight at them. The sounds of the scuttling of several legs...

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

There's no avoiding this one, it's a fight. You get one free round of combat before the swarm is upon you. (Shoot, heal, drone activation, etc) After which it's nothing but close combat until one side is dead.

And hopefully a second wave doesn't doesn't arrive...

Make your choices

"Roaches, why did it have to be roaches..."

Abbot will take up a good position with his back to the wall, and call over the medical drone to apply some protective bandaids while he waits to start smashing.

Cook says nothing. A true alpha doesn't need words to communicate. Instead, he bites his cigar with extra verve, and opens fire with the cannon. 

You're doing your part!

As Abbot accessed a little healing before the ensuing battle, Cook unleashed a full pack on the swarm cutting at least a few of their number. The swarm was then upon the both of them biting, screeching and generally being vile insects.

While Cook suffered some bites, Abbot really shined with his trusty rusty pipe, of course with this many bugs, it was hard to miss. He was smashing giant bugs until he was sure all of the fuckers were in pieces or a crumpled mess. It was a disgusting sight, but the important thing is another battle had been won.

There was no loot to be won though and the pair decided to leave quickly before a potential second wave popped up, since more sounds skittering could be heard in the distance.

Pick who is taking point next turn

How much did Cook lose?

Abbot glances over the carnage and down at his gore streaked clothes with disgust. "Man, first thing I'm doing when I get out of here is taking a hot space shower."

The skull of a still twitching insect makes a pretty satisfying crunch underfoot as he takes point and leads the way out.

Abbot 8 HP

Cook 5 HP

Cook spits blood and wipes his mouth. "You'd better take point man, I'm not feeling too hot." 

The hallucinogenic venom from the alien stingers has left him grooving in Disco Inferno, but Abbot doesn't need to know that. 

It's a trap!

Abbot took point as the two continued their trek through the forgotten zone. The hum of some sort of machinery was heard nearby and as they walked the sound of it was only getting closer...

"Here's the warm blood assholes that fucked my girl! Warren Snakes attack!"

Getting caught slippin' was bad enough, but the accusation of also being party to intermingling with alien scum made this even worse for Abbot.

Speaking of worse the ambush startled Abbot enough that he dropped his weapon and you'll have to spend an action round if you want to retrieve it. (or get it after this encounter)

Make your combat choices

Fuck.

Abbot will just use his fists, his Combat Protocol, whatever it is the Chrono Rig does if that's usuable in combat, and pure testosterone.

Still woozy from being stung a thousand times, Cook knows exactly what's going on - he's back in  'Nam. 

"Charlies coming out of the goddamn space-jungle!" he yells, opening fire at the lizard people. 

Stop thinking with your snake

Despite the ambush, Cook maintained his cool and cut down several of the filthy snake men, though he certainly took a few hits of his own.

Abbot had less of a choice given that he was already surrounded by several of them armed only with his fists. He landed some good shots thanks to his implant and chrono rig allowing him to have the reflexes of a younger man.

Cook healed up a bit and then joined in the fire as there were only a few left and he didn't want Abbot to get overwhelmed. Another one went down, but the leader who had accused them both of fucking his girl was still holding his own.

The snake gang leader moved and weaved like...well a snake and managed to avoid even a lot of Abbot's attempts to hit him, meanwhile he struck with fast percision even knocking Cook on his ass at one point.

Cook shook the cobwebs just in time to see the damn thing coming at him with a wide mouth full of teeth and puffed up hood hissing loudly the entire time.

Abbot stopped Cook from getting a lethal dose of venom by kicking the alien in the back of the legs knocking him to the ground. Abbot then proceeded to end this once and for all using his old man strength to stomp the back of the alien's neck breaking his teeth and skull.

It was finally over. Nothing left except dead snakes and the hum of the power generators. Abbot helped Cook up, but shook his head at him at the same time.

"See, this is what happens when you fuck a strange alien in the ass!" Abbot shouted as he went to retrieve his rusty pipe.

While retrieving the pipe Abbot noticed one of the one of the snake men had a ballistic shield, not that it did him any good since half his head was blown off. Still was holding it tightly against his body in death though. Ballistic shield reduces 1 HP loss from ranged combat to a minimum of 1.

Decide who is getting the shield and pick who is taking point

Cook will pick the shield up, given as he got Swiss-Cheesed the hardest. 

"Man, I'll take up the rear. If the snake motherfuckers come back, they could slither right up our asses without us realizing. So uh... you take point." 

Maybe a lead shield next time

Cook went to go get the shield though he wished he'd had it before all this happened. When he went to get it off the dead snake man he had trouble even pulling it off of him, almost like it was fused to hand. Cook assumed this was probably a case of death grip so he just pulled harder and eventually reached to grab under the shield to pry the fingers apart.

With some effort he was successful, though it was somewhat nasty since there was a slimy texture when doing this. What the hell had this snake fucker been jerking off during the attack?

Alien love juice however would have potentially been a slightly less immediately damaging substance however, since this particular dead snake's hand and arm was in the process of MUTATING and now so was Cook's own hand from touching the residue.

The effects were as usual immediate and painful as Cook felt his entire arm altering. (Lose 1 HP) 

After it was all said and done, Cook's arm now had hardened to the point that it was almost like a shield itself, though he probably couldn't make a habit of that (Can automatically block once per game during a close combat round)

Now with a "shield" on both arms, Cook staggered to follow Abbot to wherever else this hell hole had in store for them.

"Fuck, fuck! I've had ENOUGH of these aliens and mutant freaks! What is the GA even thinking getting in bed with those types--I mean, look how it worke out for YOU. And if you ask me, we are way overdue for another galaxy wide cleanse," Abbot swore, trying to stop the bleeding on his new sets of injuries.

It took him a moment to notice the shape Cook was in (although he didn't seem to notice that the younger man was now sporting a subtle mutation of his own, probably for the best.

"Oh, damn. Yeah, let me go first, and make sure you have the drone looking you over any time you're not shooting." Cook was covered in several deep cuts, some of them looked quite bad, but Abbot was masculine enough to suppress his emotions. Still, he couldn't help but be haunted by the ancient human adage, "the black guy always dies first."

Crack Attack!

Abbot lead the way as Cook limped behind. He really wasn't looking good, and Abbot wasn't feeling so great himself, but they'd been in this sort of situation before and made it. They couldn't let despair get the better of them.

They also couldn't let the crack head that jumped out of nowhere get the better of them either...

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

It's of course another fight. Close combat only since he closed in so fast, still you have the option of attempting to meet him head on or use his aggression against him.

Make your choice

Cook is going to go for the medical drone, and if possible use his once a game auto-block to avoid getting a new asshole torn open. 

Abbot has put away so many crackheads, even in his injured state he will not shy from meeting this one head on.

Winners don't use drugs

Abbot engaged the space crackhead while Cook activated the drone to at least gather a bit of strength first.

While space crackheads often have the freakish speed to go along with their freakish strength, Abbot was fortunate enough to have picked up that chrono-vest to keep the pace of dodging and hitting him. Though hitting a space crackhead with a rusty pipe wasn't exactly the quickest way to put one down.

Cook joined the fight, but it probably would have been safer if he hadn't as he nearly got his head smashed in. He managed to block this fatal punch with his newly acquired hardened mutant arm. The skin cracked from the force of this blow and he still felt the impact, but there was nothing but a minor twinge of pain.

Abbot continued to hit the space crackhead, dodging and blocking several attacks, until finally the pipe did its job and put the crazed addict down for good.

After a small rest from the battle, the only thing that was found on the crackhead's body was a teleporter on his wrist. Might explain how he just suddenly appeared like he did.

Teleporter allows you to automatically get into a flanking position without having to risk getting shot at. (One time use)

Decide who is getting it and who is taking point

Cook grabs the teleporter.  

"Man, I'm unclear on how this flanking mechanic works still, but this is probably helpful," he says. "You better take point on the next one, I think you're bleeding slightly less than I am." 

Well you'd have to drop something to carry it in your case, either your cannon or your shield since your mutation (now used) is taking up an inventory slot.

Both of those seem important, never mind then 

Discard the shield, buddy. Teleporter numbah wan.

Can we even flank when only one of us has a gun?

Yeah you can flank for ranged or close. You just risk getting shot by an enemy's ranged attack while attempting it.

After which time, you attack (ranged or close) and you remove one extra die from the enemy if you hit and the enemy doesn't get to attack back.

Flanking only works once though.

"Yeah, yeah, I know the routine by now. But once we're bleeding the same amount I'm gonna insist on using that shield if you expect me to keep finding all the threats with my face," Abbot grumbles, taking point.

He'll grab the teleporter for now just in case in comes in handy later. Maybe he can pawn it for another bowl of noodles.

Mad Mech

Abbot and Cook continued along the twisting dimly lit corridors attempting to follow the faded signs marking the way to the shuttle bay area where presumably the ship was being held.

Couldn't understand WHY it the hell it was all the way in the damn section of the station that's considered dangerously unsecure even by its lax standards. But then who knew why the station and its inhabitants did what the fuck they did.

The end seemed to be in sight, but it was blocked by something very large...

"YOU! I heard what you did! You entered my girl and left her crippled! She can't walk now! She was a beautiful D-400 not a damn K-100! Die you fucking ugly bag of mostly water!"

You've got two choices, you can run away, though you'll have to find another way around in this case and go through a different encounter.

Of course fighting always works too.

Make your choice

Moment of truth!

"Cook, I'd ask you to stop getting inside the girlfriends of these inhuman freaks, but I know it wouldn't do any good."

Once close combat begins (meaning once Cook is done shooting) Abbot will attempt a flanking manuever with the teleporter in addition to his usual melee tricks.

Cook nods stoically to his Caucasian brother-in-arms. 

"My father told me three things before he left to get cigarettes. First: always slowly get your registration when the cop asks for it. Second: always be yourself. Third: never apologize for fucking another man's bitch."

He opens fire, expecting death but taking solace in the fact that he defied stereotypes enough to not die first. 

Twisted Metal

Cook unleashed his cannon and nothing, it jammed. This was the worst timing possible and Cook fully expected this to become the stereotype he had tried to avoid for so long.

However, not this time. Abbot using his teleporter distracted the mech just enough that his shots missed Cook entirely.

Abbot used this distraction to get a solid hit on the mech's external sensors evening up the odds a bit at least as far as keeping it not being able to hit accurately.

Cook took the opportunity to heal up while Abbot continued to move like a man half his age thanks to his chrono-rig. Dodging, smashing and blocking.

The mech was starting to wear down, and not wanting to waste time reloading, Cook charged in to help Abbot.

And once again got clobbered for his troubles, fortunately for him Abbot once again played white savior and landed a critical blow on some vital component before the angry bot could re-enact American History X from its database.

With the bot now a dead heap of scrap Abbot once again helped Cook up while shaking his head.

"That's TWO."

Upon looking to see if the mech had anything that could potentially be pulled off to use, the team saw an emergency medpack on the wall which was all the loot they were getting out of this.

The only other thing that was in the corridor was this door...

Decide what equipment you're taking (or switching around) and get ready for the final confrontation

Cook uses the med kit on himself. "Man, that was too close. I was tasting concrete."

He will then kick the door open, taking point against these suckas once and for all. 

What's the hp?

Abbot could REALLY get used to this Chrono Rig, I think it's the only thing keeping his limbs attached and his insides inside right now.

Abbot 4

Cook 1

Cook just used the medpack.

Check the expiration date

With the end in sight, Cook grabbed the medkit off the wall, opened it up and started patching himself up immediately starting with his leg which had a nasty gash. He took a tube of medigel and just started squeezing the tube into the wound. (Heal 1 HP)

No sooner had he done this when his leg started to feel weird. There wasn't any pain, but something definitely wasn't right either. He looked at the medigel which according to the date had been expired for over a hundred years. The chemicals making up the substance had changed and now his leg was changing as Cook felt the affects of MUTATION

There was tingling, discoloration, pressure, and some changes in texture, but ultimately the transformation wasn't painful. His leg actually felt a bit "springier", but a bit weaker, like it was harder for him to carry all the weight he was carrying.

This mutation allows you once per game to avoid any hits from a ranged attack no matter how much damage you take. Unfortunately now this mutation is taking up one inventory space so you're either going to have to drop your ballistic shield or your cannon (Pretty sure we all know which decision you're going with)

He wails in agony, barely clinging to life. He steadies himself, though, by picturing the sick hops he'll be capable of. The shield clatters to the floor, still covered in alien jizz. 

"Yeah, sometimes those meds do sting a little, but keep it together, man, we're almost out of here," Abbot says obliviously.

Cook is gonna die.

The Mighty Janitor

Cook and Abbot stepped through the bay doors and saw the GA ship. A good sign that nobody else had taken it yet.

They also saw a lone alien in a uniform cleaning up the remnants of something on the floor along with a couple of large trash cans. He looked up from his mopping and took the joint out of his mouth...

"Whoa man...you guys aren't supposed to be here...guess I gotta kill you now...cool..."

In what is one of the more annoying convoluted boss encounters, this guy's got a bunch of weird rules which honestly you won't have to deal directly with, but I'll let you know anyway.

Basically he can't suffer two consecutive hits of the same type and becomes immune to them. This includes close combat hits (Might, wisdom, cunning) and ammo types. (Though you only have ballistic anyway) This effect is cumulative from round to round, which means he can become damn nigh invulnerable at a certain point.

However, if he doesn't suffer ANY wounds during a round, he basically loses all his immunities and the process starts all over again. (For story purposes, you can assume he's so high off his ass he can't keep focus)

He's also got a shitload of HP (his dice) and does 3 points of damage in ranged and close combat, meaning he's pretty much killing Cook instantly if he ever hits (Though that's been practically the case for the last few encounters). Abbot's going to fair a little better thanks to all his re-rolls and whopping 4 HP, but at best it's going to be a tedious "pipe sponge" affair.

As an infamous android once said "I can't lie to you about your chances but... you have my sympathies."

You guys are fucked.

Sweet! 

Welp.

Odds were low anyway but drawing the "you lose" card feels better than a tactical failure (like killing your team or throwing a stun grenade in close combat...)

Does the pipe cause the same kind of damage as bare fists? Uhhh, maybe Abbot can stab with his fingers, Stooges style.

Abbot prepares to activate his teleporter, consoling himself that at least he faced death with a real one at his side. He wondered if there were any other survivors left at this point, and if they could say the same.

"Been real nice working with you, Cook. And damn, if this freak doesn't kill us we are both fucking its girlfriend..."

Cook extends his non-mutant hand for a final fist bump. 

Uh, the teleporter was one use. You don't have it anymore.

To be fair, the despair of the situation must be getting to Cook.

He still could've flanked without it, I suppose it wouldn't have made much difference with the amount of HP that thing had though.

Or is even flanking pointless? Does it do MORE damage, or just hit a second time? (Which it would've been invulnerable to anyway.)

Flanking would have put you at risk of getting shot and I was trying to play you as defensively as possible especially in the beginning. He did 3HP of damage and you only had 4 and you were probably going to NEED that extra round to live since Malk had jammed with his cannon.

I had a plan of attack all the way down to what and how you'd need to beat it but for some damn reason blocks were not being rolled as frequently as they were in past battles so that lead to death

Anyway hitting while flanking basically allows you to take away another die from the enemy if you hit and the enemy can't hit back for that one round.

Ah, I thought I'd read that getting hit while moving into flank position always defaulted to 1hp.

I mean yeah he would have only done 1, so you would have lived, but his next hit close or ranged would have been 3 killing you.

The Changeling had these stats

1 Might

2 Cunning

2 Wisdom

THEN I rolled the extra two dice which was another Cunning and another Wisdom

The main issue was you had to eliminate that Cunning stat ASAP, because Abbot didn't have any way to block AND hit with that symbol.

Abbot had a double might/block and a double wisdom/block. All the cunning rolls would have been singles and unless you killed the Changeling THAT turn, you would have gotten hit, so you needed at least enough HP to take a hit for a Cunning roll. The problem is there were 3 Cunnings, so Cook HAD to take one of those out. Ideally he could do that with his gun, which he did, but he got lucky on that second time since the Changeling missed shooting him back. Since the Changeling was immune to bullets now, I just had Cook go up and fight close combat, he could at least block and might even be able to stay in the fight longer. Essentially he'd done the bare minimum of taking out that one Cunning. If he died at any point Abbot still could have won, though it would have been harder of course.

Abbot theoretically could have block spammed/hit with Might and Wisdom all day long though and with 3 re-rolls I figured you'd be able to do that easily. Even if the Changeling was ever immune from everything that round, the plan was to just roll a block for you so you'd survive.

Dice just weren't rolling well though.

I fought, I lost, now I rest

Cook opened fire only for his increasingly unreliable weapon to jam again. The Changeling drew a side arm of his own, but thanks to Cook's new springy leg, he managed to move quick enough to avoid the fatal shot. He wouldn't be able to move like that again though as he felt like he twisted something in the process.

"Whoa...I'm higher than ten motherfuckers right now." the Changeling laughed.

Abbot ran in with his pipe, landing a hit on the Changeling, but this time his heightened speed didn't help, the changeling was moving about it such a way that reminded him of one of those old drunk masters and the changling managed to hit him with a force he didn't expect from its size.

"Ow! That hurt dude!"

Cook added to the pain by getting off a shot, hitting the changeling who returned fire again, but this time he legitimately missed thanks to his clouded state of mind.

"Alright, you're harshing my buzz now!"

Abbot struck again with his pipe, though not doing as much damage as he'd like, he at least managed to not get hit this time.

"Fuck! You guys are dicks, man!"

Realizing he wasn't going to be able to do any more damage with his gun again, Cook charged into combat hoping he was good enough to avoid getting hit at least. Abbot once again managed to land another hit...

"Aw man, that is IT!"

And with the stoned Changeling janitor's patience at an end, he transformed into something much larger and hit a lot harder than his humanoid form and with one tremendous swipe, the Changeling managed to cause both Abbot and Cook to go flying across the room, cracking and breaking several of their bones in the process.

Their bodies were even close to the GA ship, but neither one was in any shape to move, let alone fight at this point. This was it and it sucked. Abbot saw next to him that Cook wasn't even moving or breathing. This really sucked.

Then Abbot looked up and saw something that made this suck even more, a familiar figure could be seen standing and looking down from one of the ship's windows...

"Lol, fags."

For fuck's sake...it had been waiting this whole time just to mock their last moments...fucking sexbot...

Abbot's eyes closed as the engines of the ship started up and the docking doors opened.

"Hey! You're gonna depressurized the place! Uncool man!"  the Changeling janitor shouted, holding on to something on the wall as the ship began to leave into space (along with several containers and dead bodies).

Lt. Cook

Killed by Changeling Janitor

Survival time: 14 encounters

Lt. Abbot

Killed by Changeling janitor

Survival time: 14 encounters

Team Alpha's attempts to ESCAPE THE DARK SECTOR have ended here.

The gun jammed AGAIN at the most cinematic moment reeee

The fight went on much longer than expected honestly, knew it was a loss when we drew the Changeling.

It's been fun though, thanks for running these! And the amount of time and space fuckery that's been going on in the other decks makes it seems like we really could run a third game sometime without having to replace any characters.

We won the moral victory by being the Realest Ones on the entire station, except for maybe Grib. 

The Realest Dead Ones.

Brave mujahideen martyred in the cause of being Based and Chad > gay ass silicon sexbot destined to spend life in a 4chan user's piss jar 

Your character was some kind of black space crack head? He had no such honors.

ok fleshlight 

S