Forums » The Parlor Room » Read Thread

And I doubt I'll be making another. Maybe.
Your Fate Like Clockwork
Judge my craft, O decisive ones.

I want to smack you for not having an end game link for deaths. 

I assume I'm chalking up one person who didn't notice "END" is a page link itself. Should I hint at that somewhere or make it more obvious? Maybe a lighter shade of blue so it looks more like what people expect a link to look like?

That's not an end-game link, paint chip eater.

Winners get end-game links.

Ahh. Only winners get opinions. Losers, the ones who, oftentimes, are actually taking the time to read most of the story game cannot have an opinion and suggest feedback. What unparalleled genius.

 

 

And one with sound.

Thara's old role in the Discord was 'Designated Supercunt' so this is merely her job. No one is really sure what's going on with Ebon these days, but it doesn't seem worth paying much attention to.

Anyway, the game is fantastic. I've got a couple others I've promised reviews on first but I'm looking forward to exploring this one as soon as I can set aside a big chunk of time for it.

Ah, that's kind of understandable. There isn't one objective correct style of story-writing around here anyway. 

I just objectively like being able to consider deaths a non-standard game over and there being a page that leads to an end-game link for the player to choose right then and there. 

But if you want someone to see a proper end until they're able to rate and comment, whatever. That is your choice, but you should make sure the story is good enough and interesting enough for a person to want to reach that point. 

From what I've read so far, I don't think that's a problem you'll have. 

I've added the links because I'm a man of the people. Sorry if my first reply to you came off passive-aggressive; it was actually a genuine question. But by my second reply I wasn't willing to listen anymore.

"Winners get end-game links." is the kind of chad statement that's actually just fine coming from someone with a 300k word count feature worthy game. But I do think adding the links is a good move that will increase the number of ratings and comments given overall.

Started out cool, but too much looping and "turn left/turn right" choices towards the end though for me.

Can't be bothered to play through it again to rate it higher now, though I'd probably leave the rating anyway due to the above issues.

Gave it a 6 due to all the work and dedication that obviously went into it. Plus it was good enough that it caught my attention to actually play willingly in the first place.

I've taken this to heart and while I won't be altering the environments themselves at this point, I'm implementing some changes that might make those sections more bearable.

Assuming you're talking about the dungeon section, I've added a scribbled dungeon map that can be found in town under the right circumstances.

If it's the stairwell you mean, then I'm working out what sort of fight scene could be added to it to break up some of the left-right consecutiveness, in addition to what's currently hidden there.

But yeah, what Thara said. (Not the paint chip thing, the other post.)

Just an fyi to Jeremy, usually plentiful End Game links are encouraged because, one, some readers resent feeling like they're being railroaded to one particular canon end, and even after getting it they're going to want to explore around more and maybe comment at some later point.

And two it just gives a better chance of ratings and feedback even from people who might have an opinion on some particular aspect of it or writing style etc, even if they're not dedicated enough to finish the entire thing. In the past there was this recognition of withholding links as a tactic used to ensure the only people who had a chance to rate a game, were the ones that liked a game enough to stick with it, which I think is where some disgruntlement is coming from.

But yeah, there's nothing set in stone on any of this stuff, it's more some guidelines drawn from observations of reader preference which we have refined over the years. You should present your game however you want it to be played. The writing and presentation is strong enough I think it'll sway almost anyone, and of course I assume you're bringing in some friends from other sites who gave no preset opinions on this stuff.

Congratulations on publishing.
Seems really impressive from my first playthrough. Looking forward to reading some more tomorrow.

Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it.