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The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Hey guys and girls. I am working my new story, The Citadel of Virtue, and I was just looking to gather some (constructive) criticism on the plot. It goes smething like this. The main character, Aedan, is an apprentice shepherd when the port city he lives in, Oceania, is attacked. While the city is burning, Aedan escapes, well not really escapes, mor like gets knocked on the head and is saved by a traveler. He wakes up in a castle of some sort, and is brough to a huge decision, that diverts the story into two different plots, The Phoenix and The Raven storyline. The Phoenix story is one that focuses on being the so-called good guy, always being helpful and peaceful and ultimately a paragon of good. The Raven story is more of a renegade story, where the ends justify the means. This story is more of a story than a game, involving less decisions, but still plenty, and more story. So, what do you think?

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

I actually prefer stories with more 'story, and I really like the sound of this. The only potential issue that I can see is that as a character, an apprentice shepherd is so much more likeable than yet another kingdom saving badass - not that I have anything specific against the latter, I just hope you find a way to make the transformation semi-believable and keep things interesting once it happens.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago
Oceania? I'm pretty sure that isn't an original name.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

I dunno, I think it's okay. If he called it something as specific as 'Philadelphia' or whatever than sure, I'd see a problem with that, but I'm not exactly going to be scratching my head wondering at the in-universe explanation for people naming a city by the ocean 'Oceania'.

There's a town called Threefork in a story I'm working on. It's named that because it's built across three forks of a river. I later found out there's a real life town called Three Forks, but it's not like I'm going to go and change it just because I'm worried someone might think I'm ripping off Montana.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

It's from 1984.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago
Thank you.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

You;re welcome.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

It's "from" a real life region in the Pacific.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Ever played Gothic IV by any chance?

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Since the player chooses what they are aligned with (good/bad) early on, you're really limiting any sort of moral choices in the story.  I mean are you going to allow him to do a "good" decision once he is in the Ravens? Or are the decisions mainly going to be tactical ones with your character just automatically getting increasingly good or evil depending on their initial alignment?

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago
Yeah, limited all morality to one choice sounds like a good way to take all of the most important choices out of the story.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago
(dude, we just agreed on something)

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Ok, I didn't know about the name, I have Gothic IV, and No matter what faction you join, you can always retain your morals. Oh, and Elder Scrolls makes Gothic IV its bitch.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

This only applies if you're talking about the pre-Oblivion era.

Anyway, how far along are you at this point? Keep us updated, I really do like the sound of this.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Yes, Pre-Oblivion. I liked Oblivion, but from what I have experienced, Morrowind had better story. And post-Oblivion looks pretty FREAKING amazing. And so far in the story, I'm having kinda in training, because you don't really know how to use a sword when you take care of sheep. And, for people who have played the Mass Effect or Dragon Age games, there is CONFIRMED romance in the story.

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago
Lol and how is that a good thing?! I remember a time when RPGs focused on killing everything that moved and gaining loot, not worrying about chick flick dating sim antics.

Nah, I don't really care, I'm still getting Skyrim. I just think it's funny when game developers hype romance options as a big selling point for their RPGs. Bioware has been getting pretty ridiculous about it with each new DA and ME game they make.

Anyway I can see the furries already hoping you get to romance one of those cat or lizard people. (as opposed to relying on porn mods, though they'll still use them anyway)

Gothic 2 was pretty cool, played a demo of Gothic 4 but it just didn't do it for me. Though I laughed when a woman asked what I did with all my sheep and my character gleefully said "I slaughtered them all!"

The Citadel of Virtue

12 years ago

Haha!! My guy did the same thing! And, I think you're partially right on the romance thing. I think it should be a definite option, but in a classy way, not focus so much on the sexual parts, although that's good too. It should just be a way to immerse yourself further into the story.