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  I picked up this big brick and I never thought I would like it as much as I did. Seriously.

  The best part about the book was the world building. I'm always up for a great adventure, and there Frank Herbert is, handing me a ton of sand. Thanks, Frank Herbert. I love this glorious, mental image you've given me. I pictured all the sand worms like the ones from that positively terrifying animated film, The Tree Of Palm. I wanted to know more.

  As far as characters go, I never reaaally got invested, but they all did their job. Jessica was pretty cool. For, some reason, I liked Kynes. I think I only actually felt anything for Paul when he went through his "I FEEL EVERYTHING AND NOTHING AT THE SAME TIME MATH MATH MATH" thing.

  BUT OF COURSE there's the not so best parts. The villain. And, like, he was a good bad guy and all, but I had a beef! I actually decided I liked him. Frank Herbert didn't want me to like him, obviously, because he kept shoving in my face the fact that he was DISGUSTINGLY FAT and had to wear DISGUSTING SPACE FATNESS PANTS and look at how GROSS FAT he is...Well then. Okay. I get it. He's greedy and gluttonous and stuff. Very gross. But also there's that thing. The gay, pedophilic thing. Because, ya know, he can't just be gay, he has to be a GAY PEDOPHILE. And he wants to FONDLE THE UNDER AGED MAIN CHARACTER with his DISGUSTING, FAT GAY PEDO HANDS like a DISGUSTING PEDOPHILIC HOMO. Also, he has CHILD SLAVES he buys to satisfy his PEDOPHILIC, GAY URGES and he also wants to sort of BEAT THE SWEET BABY MEAT of his own UNDER AGED NEPHEW!

  Do you see what I'm getting at? I get it. He's a bad, bad man. I'm just sitt'n there, try'n to enjoy this great fantasy sci-fi adventure and then the darn author has to remind me that the Baron's lick'n his lips at something green off the tree. So I have beef. Not big beef -- I'd say only about a singular cow haunch-- but I wish I didn't have that beef, I'm not hungry right now, thanks.

  I've been drawing all sorts of space thingies on my papers and I think I might make a nice picture for this frick'n cool book.

I swear if I didn't already know the story of Dune already, by your post all I would have thought is that the story is about gay pedophiles. Lol.

NOTE TO EVERYBODY: Dune by Frank Herbert is not about, but simply features a Gay Pedophile™. It's actually about sand Jesus, crack, vaguely explained psychic abilities, blue people, murder, adventure, helicopters (but spelt wrong), shifting alliances, water, worms addicted to previously mentioned crack, politics, shiny knives, and one, singular gay pedophile.

Tell me of the kid touchers of your homeworld, Usul.

Lol, nice avatar Dream.

Good post, looking forward to the next one you make a year from now.

Puddle: they are not blue people, they just have solid blue eyes.

Also, don't ever read past the original trilogy. Trust me on this.

Aw, now I'm just sad. I was looking forward to more sandy Messiah adventures. What happens after the trilogy?

Most of the other books were prequels written by his son and there are some strong feelings within the fan base about him being a shitty writer that has destroyed everything his father created.

*catches a glimpse of Duncan after his 541st reincarnation and orgasms instantly because he is so manly*

Yeah, Brian Herbert and Kevin J. Anderson seem like rather clumsy writers. I'm not totally in love with Frank Herbert's dry style, but he at least didn't explain everything to the readers but instead assumed they'd have the intelligence to figure things out. 

"Gay Pedophile" is a registered trademark? I swear, everything is becoming corporate now...

You gotta pay 99 cents before they let you fuck kids. What's the world coming to? 

In which Puddlebunni only describes the bits he jerked off to

He forgot the pee and corpse drinking tho.