Hues of Infection

This is a storygame with a premise that I haven't seen on this site. In addition, it's actually well-executed (within the constraints of the story). This means it's essentially a unicorn. Overall, this story is a short but sweet adventure with some replay value, cool--albeit unexplored--lore, and solid writing.

The story works really well within the word count constraints. The plot is concise, action-packed, yet full of worldbuilding, and I feel like it lends itself to at least one or two replays--depending on how well you do your first time around. Despite the fact that it does feel complete, the plot also suggests a continuation of the story, one which could easily be incorporated to bring the plot to its total conclusion.

Atmosphere is pretty on-point, but I feel like some of the choices aren't clearly conveyed in the context of the situation. We're forced to make choices from the POV of a character that has vastly more knowledge than us. Simultaneously, this kind of forces you to play through more of the story, so I guess it accomplishes a goal. I did feel like I had a pretty comprehensive understanding of the main story, but the lore that is mentioned isn't explained at all--although it's implied that there might be a correlation between the events.

The atmosphere is enhanced by the writing, and the story had few SPAG errors or awkward lines as icing. I felt like I could comfortably set myself into the MC's shoes after playing through once, and I could logically deduce some of the plot points to reach what I assume is the best ending. Although they weren't entirely clear on the first readthrough, they made more sense with the context gleaned from that reading.

I actually enjoyed this a lot. It was cool, it didn't over-stay its welcome, and it left me wanting more.

In the brain cubicles I found a coding bug. Plus in the eighth floor

%%BLANC%>%0%"I am not impressed by superficial observations, Principal Investigator, just as I am not impressed with needing to clean up your mess."
"Blaming me already?"

"You know what awaits you."

"Of course," his cheer is diminished. "It was always a risk I took, taking on all that I did. But all I did was for Organ, and I am sure they will come to see that. And besides, look at you acting like this mess has been sorted out, we aren't at the finger pointing stage just yet!"0BLANC%=%0%"I am not impressed by superficial observations, Principal Investigator."

"Remroids are so hard to please."

"You've interacted with us before?"

"Can't say that I have. Not much at least," he adds.%%

The dialogue was a little difficult to read through. It almost feels like there was only one person talking. Everyone had kind of the same voice.

The descending floors was a fun element and it was a fun thing to anticipate what the lower level might bring.

I was surprised that no one tried to attack you when you say to the other people to stay put. Wouldn't any of them downright panic and threaten you, but they seem to take the infection quite well.

Cool game where you play as a Remroid, which I'm not completely sure but I think is a kind of sci fi slang for a Hemorrhoid.

It was nice, but got over quite quickly.

I think this was a very interesting storyline and world. You did a great job making the reader want more by the end of it. Aside from the usual spelling mistakes or grammatical errors - it wasn't too bad technically speaking.

Story-wise it was very enjoyable to read. I liked how each floor played a different role. Starting off with the 8th floor being completely shut off and had no contact was a great way for me to start thinking what could be down there. After reading your post in the forum about the story, I'm glad you decided to keep it short and to the point. The point blankness of the writing actually made it seem like I was really an android.

Great job!