Imagination

General Recommendation: I recommend this game, particularly for those looking for a nostalgic reminder of the kind of fantasy books you read when you were younger.
Preview: After being transported to a fantasy world by the evil Nightmare Tyrant, can you use your budding powers of imagination to make it safely home?

=SPOILERS BELOW=

General notes:
Too many authors of children’s stories think they can get away with one dimensional characters and little humor or dialogue of interest. EndMaster does not fall into this pitfall, making each side character their own distinct person, and making the writing enjoyable for kids and adults alike.
In many ways this story seems like it’s aimed less at children, and more at teens and adults recalling a specific aspect of their childhood. Certainly it works as a children’s story, but the work’s tone and elements heavily recall a specific genre of children’s fantasy books that older readers will be more likely to recognize than younger ones.
Many books of this genre focus on an imaginative protagonist pulled into a fantasy world, who uses their unique skills and traits to succeed and return home. In this story, the narrator’s powers of imagination are explicitly supernatural, providing both a driving force for the plot, and tying into the main theme of the power of imagination. The story does a good job with this theme. It uses it as a driving force for the plot rather than hitting the reader over the head with it, and the narrator’s deus ex machina abilities are allowed to cause as many problems as they solve. What’s more, as with many of the elements in this genre, the imagination-powered abilities act as a metaphor for the protagonist’s life in the real world, with the protagonist and nightmare tyrnt each respectively representing the positive and negative side of imagination.

Specific notes:
-The opening paragraph firmly establishes the main character as a child, particularly, the kind of kid who likes to make up stories. The scenario used to show this is one that’s probably relatable to a lot of readers, and has a humorous and familiar tone.
-The bad guys in this game are comically evil, complete with evil laughs and one-liners. In a more serious work they might be out of place, but here they fit well with the whimsical tone of the stories this work is trying to capture.
-The imagery in this story is particularly good, it’s an important aspect of the genre.
-Many children’s stories seem to have difficulty writing adults interacting with children. This one handles it well, however, all the characters react logically. The “wizard” sees potential cheap labor, and Lyssia and the Captain are balancing protecting the narrator from the Nightmare Tyrant with other priorities.
-The worldbuilding that exists here (such as the description of Null) seems neither barebones nor overwhelming. It’s presented in a neat way that intrigues without distracting.
-Many of the characters here are traditional fantasy archetypes. We have the wizard/charlatan, the captain, the adventurer, the talking animal. It would be easy for this method of cast-building to act as a shortcut for real development, but all of these characters are well-rounded, even those with only brief roles. The use of archetypical characters also contributes to the traditional and nostalgic feel of the story, by including many figures that frequent fantasy readers will recognize from childhood novels.
-The Null is a cool concept for a setting.
-Johnny’s presence illustrates well the consequences of capture by the nightmare tyrant. He also represents metaphorically a more realistic threat, the threat of parental neglect and apathy.
-“...or was it a dream?” endings are usually groan-inducing, but as it’s a staple of the genre that inspired this work, it would be practically negligent not to include it.
-I like that the protagonist can defeat the shadows in a variety of different ways, depending on the path.
-I also like the inclusion of many common fantasy elements, such as talking animals, little people, and ghosts. Though for the most part these elements are not essential to the plot, they really make the setting feel like a traditional “fantasy” fantasy world, perfectly capturing the genre.
-The protagonists’s powers mirror the antagonist’s, which is always a nice narrative touch.
-Little scenes, like the conversations between Salzat and Lakri, are what really flesh this story’s world out.
-Once again, the worldbuilding that’s done in this story fits its scope very well. Qualan’s description of his homeland iis yet another frequent fantastic archetype.
-The idea of a halfling pretending to be a dwarf is amusing.
-It’s nice to see more of Melcar in the second path, and to see him being legitimately helpful rather than merely taking advantage of an opportunity to get his garden cleaned.

Grammar:
-“Creativeness” should be “creativity”.
-There are some dialogue punctuation issues.
Mastery of Language
This story could’ve used another round of proofreading to tidy up the sentence structure issues. It doesn’t distract, though.

Branching:
Quite good, particularly on the branch where you try to scare away the purple people. There are multiple victory endings that can be achieved, and the player has control over the direction the story goes in. The Melcar branch is a bit more linear, but this makes sense in context.

Player Options/fair choice:
Overall quite good. The consequences of actions are fair and foreshadowed, which is particularly important for a story with a younger audience.

PERSONAL EXPERIENCE: I got the ending where you make it home with the Adventurer’s help.

CONCLUSION: EndMaster has proved with this work that he’s capable of producing high-quality writing for any number of different authorial styles. A fun read.

Usually, I wouldn't fathom the thought of EndMaster and story-game "geared for children," in the same breath, but alas, it is a thing. The surprise stopped being a thing almost immediately for me when like many of his other stories, enjoyment was something that wasn't hard to be sought after and attained. I think making the protagonist that of a young child and having the adventure that they brave be something that is personal in a sense, with the goal being to return to the safe confines of their home gives this story a different sort of charm to his other works.

And like many of End's works, he makes sure to supply a colorful cast of side characters that make themselves memorable for their own reasons. Some even sharing names with characters from other stories, which I admit is something that never fails to make me smile at least as I begin to recall where-else I may have seen them from.

Be it from lazy hedge wizards, a courageous captain of knights, less than courageous knights, and what seems to be an EndMaster staple of also providing an elf lady for you to interact with. Such an interesting line-up really drives home the fact that that is indeed a work of his, despite the whole being something that even a child can read without possibly running the risk of carrying nightmares to their bed for days.

Other things that can be found and enjoyed by a reader from this story-game is an adventure that is rich in it's choices as well as it descriptive writing that paints each scene with an almost life-like light. "Like-like," in the sense that as I read, the feeling that I was in the story myself wasn't something I can escape. I believe that that's case because the story really does branch meaningfully, not in a sense of being forced or artificial, but in a way that you really do receive many opportunities in the way of how your adventure could potentially play out.

It really is something amazing and even admirable at the end of the day. And although I do say that, this still does happen to be an Endmaster production so you can indeed find yourself meeting a dastardly fate if you don't happen to be careful with the choices that you make. That sense of danger and foreboding that lurks on each page keeps this story-game true to classic choose your own adventure stories of old, while carving out its own identity with EndMaster's signature branded crave and flair that accompanies his writing.

In short, I have had the privilege and pleasure of reading many story-games in my time on this site, and some stories have truly struck a chord with me for being honestly and genuinely good and engaging. But there's a different feeling that I receive from reading something that has EndMaster listed as its author. Many writers can craft amazing adventures, but reading something from End always makes me feel that I have read something much more that I struggle to adequately apply into words.

Perhaps I could simply state that EndMaster has been my favorite writer for like a literal decade and more, and that's simply because he writes like nobody else. He has his own style that gives him the ability to apparently to excel in stories meant for both the mature and young, and it almost seems effortless on his part.

Truly an amazing and well-written work. Although I seriously had not a single thought that I could possibly even not have enjoyed it after I read the first page that kept me engaged from beginning to end, to the next path after the next, to one conclusion after the next, until I had read all there was with contentment and satisfaction.

Just like all of your stories, I have read and experienced this one for years, but still I must thank you for creating it. I just so happen to cherish your writing :)

I finally got around to reading this one today, and I am not disappointed. I did not enjoy it as much as I did many of EndMaster's other stories, but I am not the target audience anyway. As a story, it is good, but when viewed as the children's story it is, it becomes great.
The plot was simple but entertaining and sometimes humorous (the pink beard part especially made me laugh). I enjoyed seeing the Gray Building and Johnny from Repression make appearances too.
It genuinely is kid-friendly, but not in a lame way. Think of it as that one show that you can safely watch with your protective sister's children while still being entertained yourself.
Imagination accomplishes its purpose perfectly.

I lost because I tried to fight :( Sad. Good game though :D

It was great, but some parts I found confusing. It could use some improvement.

loveit

goofy ah gaem

Decent

Keep going forward and take risks

Thank you