Zurigul the Incompetent

I found this story in pursuit of my quest to rate and review a random storygame each time I log in. Due to the story length and difficulty, I was not expecting much from this game. But this story was a nice surprise!

I enjoyed the writing of this story and it seemed easy to get into the character. It was humorous without being too ridiculous and I liked that the main character took himself seriously even though the story did not.

However, in the context of a CYA it seemed that the story needed a little more. There was not much branching (only 2 places with choices) and the rest was very linear. It would be nice to see some more choices, and also some branching after that selection was made.

Overall, a pleasant game and worth the time to play all the endings.

This was in Storygames In Need, and the title seemed promising. So I decided to check it out. I do not regret that decision.


When I saw the word count of this, I became more skeptical of the quality of this, butt decided that not much time would be wasted if it was bad anyway. This was a very short story and did not have a lot of choices, but every choice it did have led to a new scene, which made it feel a little larger than it was. A short story is not necessarily a bad thing either. While this could probably become more easily, it felt as if it was all it truly needed to be.


There were a few small grammatical errors throughout, but nothing that pulled me out of the story or made it difficult to read. The narration style was a good choice and really set the tone of the story quite nicely.


If you're a weirdo who actually reads comments before the story, check Zurigul the Incompetent out. It will be a pleasant five minutes for you.

Interesting start and setup for the first scene. The single choice there works well because it really is a serious change of scene. But when we get to the second page and once again there is a single option, I’m starting to wonder if I’m going to get any choices in this story. There are certainly some choices, and that is helpful.

I like that each choice appeared to lead to different happenings and different endings. There were really only two choices in the entire story, though. And wait, since I’m a lich, why wouldn’t I keep coming back? I think that would really improve this story tremendously: each time the spells and potions didn’t work, why not send the reader back to the part where you wake up? They could still have all the choices and try to get past the paladin. Then, if you wanted to be real creative, you could add a special choice that leads to a special ending that only appears after the reader has tried all the different options (all four of them) available to them. That would be pretty cool instead of abruptly ending as the story currently does.

This story is a nice idea, I love the concept. I think it really could be a lot more with a little more effort and some additional choices and options. Thank you for sharing this one with the site.

its good

Zurigul feels like the kid in the neighborhood that thinks they are a gangster when in actuality everyone just likes to humor them.

No comment, it’s just too wondrous.

8/7
If you like comedy that gets to the point this one is for you.

whteves it was okay

It's very fun, I hope for a longer version!

This storygame seems a little rushed. Maybe if you spent a little more time on it, I would give you a higher rating. 2/8