Player Comments on I'm going out.

This is a nice setup for a story and a good first page. It helps set the tone for the story and helps the reader get into the story, at least a little bit. From there, it kind of goes downhill. The pages beyond the first page all feel very short. There are very few details on each page. There are few descriptions. The author could add a lot more details for each location: look to engage all five senses when you’re writing a story. Look for ways to describe everything the main character sees, feels, and hears. If you, as the author, can put yourself in the story, then you can help put the reader in the story – and that’s why many people read stories, to experience something else in another place.

The story itself is also quite short. I can appreciate the different options, paths, and different endings. I did have fun exploring and finding lots of different endings, which is really good for a CYOA story. But each page leading to those endings was quite short. This could be a lot more of a story with a bit more effort and just more description on each page. The story could likely be expanded by 10x the word count simply by writing more on each of the pages that already exist.

BORING ONLY A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF OPTIONS AND NOTHING TO DO

hello i like it

just pretty short

anita max wynn

very shoutey sporty love speople has lots of frenids

short good game

Daddy y

WHAT THE HELL OMG WHAT

i not read

Go home

hart warming

it was fun

good

Not the best there could have been some diagrams to show what was going on in more detail

Great game but could be more lengthy and give a ending to he encounter with the girl in the shop

Not that bad.

very great

it was boring

omg bingus./pos

pretty fun, something new

DOGGY DOO DOO

wasnt very good.

I loooooove the blood of kittens!!!!! yum!!

noice

It was a bit boring tbh but it was alr

Seemingly, I read this before, but have no recollection of it. Now that I have refreshed my memory I can safely assume that I'll forget this once again. I remember stupid stories, bad stories, and so on. This story is short and absent of distinguishing characteristics. Most things that happened were plausible.

It was like reading a clipping from a common newspaper, with little pretext and the conclusion cut off.

I just clicked at random, and now I'll type some gibberish to fit in with the other commentors swarming about.

"Hffthggkhhkjhhf a sdh"

Translation: "How do you do, fellow kids?"

It wasn't really that bad but I wouldn't exactly call it good. The best way I can describe it is...bland. It also feels like it could have been longer but really I'm just glad to check another easy story off of my list. 4/10 nothing of significance here except the comments that brought me.

qw

Well this was pretty short and had some "broken" links that just loop back when it doesn't make any sense to do so.

its was quite cool

very good

average

drgdhdhd

no ta

im preggos alexander

It is not the best because kitten are so common pet and animal they for it is not the best and not the best.

yuuuu

GOOD FODDA

rerererre

okkkk

rhth

tta

i got a girl

its good

bye

cracking my mate

no u cheecky boi

I think that its a fun way to lean what to do and make good decagons

i found it quite fun and interesting with how the story goes and the different options

Great loved the idfferent opportinities!

this game was very fun

too short

It shouldn’t end so quickly, but it’s not bad

i commented happy

It was quite short, the paths could have been fleshed out a lot more, and there was no clear plot. However, it was sound grammatically, and the different paths and endings were interesting to find.

It's a little short, but still ok.

I liked it, was short tho

Very interesting. I like it. It deserves 7/8

I went to go get groceries but Alex got mad at me!!!
>:(

Now why does this story have a 3/8 average?

It was really good in my opinion. Good plot, good choices, interesting story overall. I really don’t get all the negativity.

6/8.

it was very short and bland. It didn't make much sense and didn't have much of a plot.

I just didn't see the point in any of the stories, or endings. The girl jotting down her number was rather pointless, he never calls her, so you could have just left that out. The story was also really short. I did however love the kitten.

Interesting? Alex is a huge douche though

Such a cute story! Glad that I've read it.

It seem kind of short, but other than that, it was really funny

This was a good story! Keep up the good work!

this did not make any sense

It was fun.

I GOT A KITTEN!!!!!! :D
But seriously, the story is very short and not detailed well enough. My ending didn't fit the story I chose; do all the stories end the same way? If so, there needs to be more.
Overall poor story line but I like the kitten idea.

It was really fun! Im going to go and try to get every ending now byeeee

Fun. Many ways to have your day go in this. I like it.

Interesting...

The plot is that you go for a walk. And that's it. I like how you leave the player to do whatever he wishes, instead of just incorporating choices in some storyline as you go along the way.

It was enjoyable, but could have been longer.

Managed to entertain me better than homework. 4/8.

One more thing... you can get in an infinite loop if you want, hehe.

Forgot to put this in my last comment: I think this story would be much better if when you take the kitten the little girl says, "It's dangerous to go alone! Take this!" Anyway, it's at least a happy story if you take the cat.

Well... went back and decided to take the cat. The good news is I got to see a cute kitten picture (who doesn't love those?). The bad new is NOTHING HAPPENED! Seems like there should have been SOME sort of conflict for the protagonist to face. Haha. But the picture definitely made up for the apparent dearth of events. ;)

I found a little girl who offered me a cat. I said no, and pretty much nothing happened other than I went home. I think there could have been more outcomes for even the "wrong" choices, which clearly I made here.

It was alright

While your story has some sort of purpose, there was no true plot. Where's the conflict? And what's up with that ending? I had thought that maybe you were just getting into the exposition, but ended right where I though everything would start!!

The story lacks details and action and has little background (the part with the protagonist's mother and the chicken was good). You need more of it!

I'm very interested in the Alex character. Half of the choices are the result of his demand for groceries.

Anyway, I did like the events. Your writing piqued my interest despite the lack of meat.

11.234673/10, awesome! Would play again

it was soooooooooooooo short

Boring.

It was good, but a little short.

This was... Really short. Not much else to say, as nothing really happened in the story. :/

love this

Make it longer!

nice but too short

It is good but I wish it was longer!

Well it was a nice 50 seconds while it lasted.

4/8

You need to work on this more. this wasn't as good as anything. Good try though.

I got a pet kitten!

I didn't notice any animal cruelty. Maybe I should play it again.

Too short,

It wasn't all that bad. Some choices were a bit odd, could've been a bit longer.

This wasn't actually that bad. The story and choices could be fleshed out a little more, and it could be a little longer, but for what it was there was some all right writing. 4/8

It was okay.

But I wanted to join the no-good kids :P Seriously though, just because I hold a knife to a cat how am I abusing it?

The game was alright, though the plot was a little cliche. I feel like the branches present could have been fleshed out a lot more.

4/8.

If I saw a bear on telivision, I wouldn't be scared. Is this girl 3?

I go to the park, I get a kitten, the end...

at least the picture was cute. =P

To be honest, it was kinda alright for me. The grammar and writing is good but. . . You could made it longer and more interesting.
There was no really no definite plot to it, which is a problem.
But, over-all this story shows that you might have potential so just keep writing!

Yes it was a choose your own adventure but I was never really sure where any of it was going. You have to tie have a plot line for each of your branches, the one I followed I got a girl's number and that was that, can't we at least move to New Hampshire and raise a family of albino ninjas together(that might seem contradictory but they'd work great in the Arctic) or something? The stories are decent but seem oddly unfinished.

I'm going to start shouting "go drink a kitten!" at people from now on.

Technically sound, but the storyline I followed was pointless/plotless, with no resolution of any kind. I went to the store to buy stuff for lasagna, then a girl had a conversation with her father, then the story was just . . . over.

Not a bad little slice of life thing.

And seriously, "Go get a kitten and drink it" is one of those sentences I never thought I'd see. Though I think an adult man just walking up to a 13 year old girl in a park and striking up a conversation would worry some people more than any 'implied animal cruelty'.. :D

Running away sheltering a kitten from evil kids and a terrible park is sort of an odd reaction to having a conversation with a little girl and adopting an adorable kitty though, if you take that path instead...there are a couple of places where the looping leads to odd things like this. Writing almost-identical-but-not-quite pages is a hassle, but it lets you avoid things like this, and in a story this short wouldn't be too difficult.

Fucking PETA! I miss the good old days when you could kill all the kittens you wanted.