Songs to Say Goodbye

Player Rating4.58/8

"#305 overall, #24 for 2013"
based on 108 ratings since 11/13/2013
played 904 times (finished 122)

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length2/8

"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"

Maturity Level3/8

"must be at least this tall to play"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 10. If this were a movie, it would probably be between G and PG.

This is my first (published) story-game, it's more like a prolouge/preview to my up-coming story game which will be called 'Farewell Lullaby'. Critiquing is gladly welcomed to help me improve Farewell Lullaby which will be a bigger project than this.

This will be split up into two parts, this is the first part here about our heroes past and what leads up to the main prolouge so it's pretty short. There are 2 outcomes to the first part, good luck.

The second part will get more into the fantasy aspect of 'Songs to Say Goodbye' as well as explain the title.

Here is the story:

May the King's reign be short and swift.

A man is wanted for his crimes against the kingdom, he lives off of what he can steal, he fights for his life with almost nothing to his name.

Almost nothing but a son.

The man has but his son as company, it is the last of his bloodline and he will protect him at any, and all costs. But what if it meant his own life?

You are this man, what will you chose, your son or yourself?

Player Comments

This is very sweet, though I was a little saddened at how short the paths were. Very, very enticing story. Nice background, nice characters, tragedy, and grammar usage.

One thing about the plot is that you say what is going to happen in the link and describe it out in the page the link brings you to. This is a nice eye-opener and refreshing way to read a storygame. Although it's not normal to do so, I actually liked this way. It prevents immediate dead-links (well... not really, but you still end up knowing what happens) and forces the writer to tell the story of HOW that happened.

Very sweet characters and interesting story. Your writing skills are great! Keep up the good work; I eagerly wait the next installment!
-- Crescentstar on 12/3/2016 10:26:44 PM with a score of 0
That was extremely well written and I can't wait to read more. The only thing I would say I'd like to see changed in the full version is the part at the beginning where you have to choose an event that happens in the future. I really don't like seeing this in story games where you get to choose the results of an action, or you get to choose what another character says or does. In a story game, I think the player should only be able to control the actions of the character they're playing at that point, and shouldn't be given choices that are actually out of the characters control. Maybe change it so that the player chooses whether they stay in or go out that day. If they stay in, the bandits and king's men come, if you go out, the stuff with the mushrooms and the waterfall happens.
-- Briar_Rose on 2/11/2014 10:29:19 AM with a score of 0
This is definitely a well written story, but a story. Not a choose your story.
First of all, it was extremely short, and I feel that you could maybe have put more endings. The first ending was right on there from the first page. The second ending was already determined by the first choice, and the second choice did nothing but prolong the story or not.
The writing was beautiful, and you definitely have a way with words. I hope to see more of your work, maybe one where your choices have more significance.
Definitely don't divide a story this small into parts.
-- katgirl22 on 5/1/2018 6:15:40 AM with a score of 0
nioce
-- Jakethebro on 2/14/2018 4:45:41 PM with a score of 0
This story puts quality above quantity. Barely any words were unnecessary, which increased the impact every word had.

This story is an emotional rollercoaster. You go from an incredible high to incredible lows. You make me care more about the wife and children than entire books ever could.

This story sucks you in from the start, keeps your attention the whole way and finally spits you out in the end.
The writing is great, the characters are great and you make me want to read the second part in the series. Apart from some small grammar mistakes I think this story is great. A perfect read for a five minute break.
-- enterpride on 1/27/2018 8:27:25 PM with a score of 0
This was pretty well written, although you should have just taken the time to sling all the parts together into one story. Short series never do well on this site.

You did have some pretty nice character development, although I felt the character was complex some of it didn't seem entirely organic. Mainly just when he thought about being jealous of his son, it just seemed weird.

All in all it was a good story and I hope you can turn it into one larger story.
-- corgi213 on 1/27/2018 2:31:04 PM with a score of 0
Kudos!
I love reading new stories and I've always liked a good medieval thing stuff written.
Your writing is great. I enjoyed every part of it and now I'm going to try other options.
I can barely wait for the next part, I know it'll be as good.
Thanks for sharing this with us. You did an amazing job and I wish you the best of luck for your future projects!
-- LeoCaesar on 1/23/2018 1:01:36 PM with a score of 0
I found this game to interesting. It's purpose was to make the reader sad, for none of the endings were particularly jovial. Everything pointed the reader into a path of feeling glum. That's both what I like and don't like about this storygame.

What I like: It was saddening. Hopelessness pervaded the tale though it was set in a semi-fantasy setting. Heck, there was no silver lining on these clouds. They just poured rain down on my face.

What I Don't Like: The sadness felt shallow. I had no time to truly connect with the characters (due to the length). Additionally, the traitor bit was out of place. A character is executed for being a traitor (though was innocent). After the killing, a random character explains that randomly selecting characters for execution is common practice after battles. How does the protagonist not know? Why isn't there discontentment among the people? More importantly, is the masses can be fooled for only so long, so the executions should no longer even be effective in pacifying people's displeasure of the king.

Anyway, I did like the storygame, and the emotions it did me were high in comparison to its short length.
-- WIBN on 12/1/2017 2:08:32 PM with a score of 0
This is probably one of the most powerful stories I've seen written in only 6 pages. Very emotive but painfully short at the same time.
-- Saika on 11/27/2017 7:33:17 AM with a score of 0
Suicidal Father for the Win...
-- lejama88 on 10/25/2016 3:27:00 AM with a score of 0
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