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Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

It's that time of the year again for fellow classmates to finally ruin all the friendships we've nurtured over the course of four years before heading off into college. With that being said, I was wondering if any of you have participated in an event like this. How did it go? Tell me some of your awesome war stories!

For those of you who are out of the loop, the game "Assassins" involves multiple players stealthily (or not so stealthily) killing each other with fake weapons to be the last man or woman standing. Each player is assigned a target and an unnamed hunter, and must survive and take out their target. 

I'm quite excited for this one, with the prize pool being a huge $500 and more for the last Assassin standing. Safezones will be on campus during classes and lectures, as well as your own home (unless you invited your killer over). Anywhere else is fair game.

For those of you who have played, what are your stories? Tips and tricks or just general thoughts on the game?

I've only managed to win one game two years ago due to luck (still worth the sweet and cinematic backstab after sneaking up on the last man though :P), but with money on the line, I'd love to get a chance at taking that pot this year.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Don't let people distract you. There will often be buddy duos where one person distracts the poor victim and the other person comes up for the kill. Always stay alert.

On another note, it's great if you get your friend because I asked once asked my friend to accompany me to the bathroom. Ya know. For security reasons. And then I murdered her then and there >:)

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

My friends and I play a sort-of similar game year-round, which one of us decided to call "Gaijin Tsujiguri" after reading a cracked article, and no other official name has been suggested since. The rules are, whenever you pull out an invisible katana (extra blood grooves) and "decapitate" the other guy while saying/yelling/singing "DECAPITATION!" like Eddie Riggs from Brutal Legend, you get 2 points of honor. Whenever you get decapitated, you lose one honor. However, there are many weapons, some of them highly magical, others merely convenient, (and most of them completely fucking made up on the spot) with a whole myriad of different rules applied to them. Here are a few of the simpler ones... The ones that don't lead to hour-long discourses on whether or not this thing vs. that thing would actually work the way one or both wielders intended:

The Naginata: (Pretend you're holding a spear and say "Naginata!") The same thing as the Katana, except you can decapitate someone from a longer distance.

The Baton: (Hold your arm perpendicular to the opponent's swing and say, "Baton!") It's made out of something generally believed to be indestructible to most other weapons that aren't specifically said to be baton-shattering beforehand. (It takes longer to say "Baton-shattering <weapon name>!", so nobody uses it unless they're absolutely sure, since, y'know, decapitation only happens to the opponent if you finish saying the activation phrase before the other guy.) It blocks the katana, and then you knock the other guy out, giving you an additional honor point for mercy. The drawback is that you can only baton people who attack you first, because otherwise your arm gets sliced off and you can't attack again until you get decapitated and "respawn" in the next class. (a fate worse than actual decapitation.

Morton's Fork: (Hold up two fingers and say, "Morton's Fork".) You actually lose honor (both in-game and irl) for using this weapon, because it's kind a dick move, but everyone around you dies and loses honor too, because it works well only for the wielder and completely fucks over everyone else nearby, no matter what improvised spells and weapons they pull out their ass. It's useful when you're ahead of the game and everyone else gangs up on you.

The Flying Guillotine: (Say "Flying Guillotine!" after you've been decapitated) A magical weapon that you can fill with your spirit after decapitation, which flies out and decapitates the person who decapitated you, takes their soul and in the meantime reconstructs your body so you can catch it when it comes back around.

Flaming Shield Throw: (Say "Flaming shield throw!" and throw an invisible frisbee.) It was inspired by Berkazerka, and pretty much works like the baton, except at longer distances. (You can block ranged weapons and naginatas with the baton, but you can't knock them out unless you're close.) Since you won't get your arm cut off if you're blocking from a distance, the drawback is that you only get one honor per kill, because breaking someone's bones and then letting them burn to death isn't as humane as just decapitating them. It can be used to squeeze additional points out of Flying Guillotine users.

Claymore: (Swing like Braveheart and say "BIG FUCKIN' SWORD, LAD!" as hammily as possible.) Too heavy to be blocked by a baton or flying shield and able to knock most thrown weapons away, the Claymore basically fucks up pretty much everything, at the expense of taking longer to say than "Decapitation".

There's also gimmicks like "Re-capitation", "Steal", "Shaolin Shit", "She-Capitation", "Summon Thing" and "Summon Bigger Thing" that can be cast more times a day the more honor you have, which can turn things on their head and make the game a very dangerous one indeed, especially when 4-5 people are playing and we all get into the hallways at roughly the same time.

Whoever gets the most honor in a day wins the day, whoever wins the most days in a month wins the war, and therefore receives any and all the land, cows, heirs, peasants, crops, rent, discount trading goods, and wives that the other players might have. Then the game resets. I'm usually the winner for about 6 months in a year, February is an absolute clusterfuck, and I usually pull things out of the gutter by June, which allows me to leave the school with everyone else's imaginary spoils.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

This is infinitely more entertaining than my game. Where can I sign up? :P

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Sentinel's looks funny. Next time use Shit Blast. It works well. :D

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

To become worthy of the power to gain honor through murder, you must swear to honor the Bullshito code from this point on for every waking and unwaking minute of your natural life.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I swear master. *Bows*. 

P.S There is one big flaw in your game. Why would you get honor by assassinating somebody?

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

There is no honor in assassinating somebody. It must always be a duel of speed, power, and strategy! The closest you can get is to jump out at someone and catch them off guard, but it must always be a courageous, frontal assault where all warriors are equal. Assassins are disgraceful, cowardly bastards in the eyes of Bullshito.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Duuuuuude that sounds so awesome...! ;-; My school won't even let us play with the local ground-dragons! 

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

...Dragons?

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

He's Australian.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

That just makes it even more confusing...

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

They already have giant rats, slimes, zombies, and direchickens, it shouldn't be at all surprising that Australia is also a haven for dragons.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

that's what a snake b***r looks like, son.

 

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

You have bears *shudder

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Hey, you can see bears coming, because they usually don't go out looking for humans and they usually come alone. Bears are also just human-speed enough to run away from and just slow enough to fight if you really have to. If you have fire, or a baseball bat, or anti-bear spray, you can deal with a bear, but can you deal with an angry fuckload of kangaroos with a bat? No. Can you run away from a Kangaroo? No. Can you scare it off with fire? I don't fucking know. Bears are bad news, but if you run into a bunch of Kangaroos, the grim reaper isn't even going to bother making himself invisible.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I agree. Have you heard of Jimmy Gotu? He was attacked and marauded by a pack of those beasts until his mangled corpse lay there in the town for all of his friends and family to see. Poor Jimmy.....

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Did you know that, in Australia, many schools teach kids the alphabets by listing the wild animals that can kill them in alphabetical order?

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I thought it was the neighbors that could kill them in alphabetical order, but that might just be Lithuania.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I understand Aussies to be quite nice people unless they think your carcass would look good wrapped around their feet or hanging from their fences.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Ah, they subscribe to the old ways of chivalry.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Yeah, most of them are Brits that got shipped off as soon as England found out there was a place they could ship them off to.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Of course, we're literally those kids who get put into the naughty corner if you put Britain's colonies into a classroom.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

After watching The Revenant in theaters, I wouldn't recommend fighting off a bear with a baseball bat.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

You have obviously never been me before.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Eh...black bears can generally be scared off with loud noises, and grizzlies can be placated by playing dead.

Basically, bear attacks can be circumvented by literally anybody with so much as a basic understanding of ethology. The exceptions are bears that are accustomed to human behavior, but, Hell, a lot of state's just kill any bears they have to remove from human neighborhoods more than once.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I would much rather chase the black bear around with a bat, since that's a thing people can do apparently. I'd like to have that on my college application with the rest of my badass boasts.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Yes, because nothing makes you stand out in the world of Academia like a few charges of animal abuse...

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

The bear has no case because it was totally capable of murdering my ass at any time, and, if all things go as planned, I won't hit it. (In all likeliness, I probably wouldn't be able to do any damage anyway) I, on the other hand, am scaring it away from my camp in a way that other nearby campers might not hear, so the bear will go to their camps and kick their ass instead. By chasing bears around with a bat, I am aiding animals in their quest to eliminate the unwary from the gene pool, solve human overpopulation, and help animals take back their national parks once and for all. I threaten animals for the good of the world, whether they're clear on the concept or not.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Ah, so that explains the earlier phases of our relationship...

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

I'm probably not going to participate, it's just too much pressure and I'm a total wuss. At our school there's a rule that if you get hit by a water-based projectile, that means that you have been assassinated. So basically kids ambush each other with water balloons, water guns, etc.

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

EDIT: Pots been raised up to $1200. I don't even know the exact number of players playing anymore since it's gotten too big.

 

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Well, I'm not sure how people in other countries do it, but here, there are two stages in this. Stage one is that each high school send about twenty students and "battle" it out in our local park until only members from one high school stand. Stage two is that two days later, the ones who survived stage one battle it out.

?Well, our team/high school managed to to get into stage two, needless to say, I was the third casualty, being backstabbed by one of my friends(she has an account and is known as Firemaker here on the site) after I had taken out her crush... don't trust anyone!

?Firemaker was in the last four before being taken out by one of her close friends, said close friend went on to win the prize which was the equivalent of 350$ and a trophy...

?Needless to say, we take our "hunts" quite seriously and I would take another shot at it...

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Like "The Ship"?

Senior Assassins - Letting out your inner stalker

8 years ago

Basically :P

The Inner Stalker

8 years ago