This is a game I learned from a friend. What you do is someone makes a wish and the next person says: Granted, but . . ." and then you need to make a negative to that. Then the person who granted the wish will make his/her wish so it will look like this:
me: I wish I could fly.
Ugilick: Granted, but you won't be able to land. I wish I could ride a horse.
Bo: Granted, but you can't control it. I wish . . .
Etc. Etc.
I'll start;
I wish I had managable hair.
Granted, but you would have to cut it all off to make your wish come true
I wish I could read minds.
Granted, but you will no longer be able to use your five senses.
I wish I was the protagonist in the story called life.
Granted, but the story ends in the antagonist's favor.
I wish I had a pen.
Granted, but the pen has no ink.
I wish for nothing!
Granted, but it is poisoned.
I wish for unpoisoned pepsi!
Granted, but they will have used urine instead of water to make it.
I wish, I wish, upon a star, to have never watched that video.
Granted, but you are warped to a world where it is useless.
I wish I had a hat.
Granted, but the positives that will be included will be useless to you.
I wish for a super computer.
Granted, but you won't receive them until you are dead.
I wish for immortality.
Granted, but you till age.
I wish to be a killer robot.
Granted, but instead, she spends the rest of her life in the bathroom.
I wish I had a mind control device.
Granted, but all your controlled people will turn on you.
I wish I have a published book.
Granted, but once everyone has died from war.
I wish for inspiration to help me finish my storygame.
I wish ugilick would remember typing the second portion of both these things and the PBM's.
Granted - but he will never play them!
I wish my story entry didn't get shot down in this other website :(
Granted, but they take them to Dol Guldur instead.
I wish I could find the droids I'm looking for.
Granted, but you will not have a mind to think with.
I wish my gf wasn't such a neat freak.
Granted, but it will probably have to be in your dreams.
I wish there was an actual purpose to existence other than what we make it.
Granted, but that purpose is a dissapointing one.
I wish I knew everything.
Wish denied since I made a more awesome wish :D
Granted, but the purpose is so sinister that you wish you had none.
I wish to own my own island, with no natural disasters or animals or humans negatively affecting it or myself.
Granted, but it is 1 centimeter radius wide.
I wish for....A HERRING!
Granted, but it comes with the package of three homosexual guys on ecstasy, dressed in Domina Matrix outfits.
I wish my thoughts ran like the speed of light.
Granted, but you loose your voice.
I wish to ride a goat onto a pickup-truck wearing nothing but a rainbow colored scarf and a WW2 helmet that has a huge fracture in it, but has been repaired with fabric from the rainbow colored scarf. Also, the goat's name is Harold.
Granted, but the goat suddenly turns insane and drives the truck into a lake. At the bottom of the lake is an old nuclear warhead which explodes once the truck hits it. Upon exploding all the water in the lake floods the nearby town, killing hundreds. Distraught by the loss of his entire family, James Johnson develops a time machine in order to go back in time to prevent this tragedy. Sadly he dies shortly after completing the time machine and it is found by a young boy who was delivering the newspaper to him. The boy climbs into the time machine and accidentally goes back in time to when you ride the goat into the pickup truck. He yells out at the goat as it steps onto the truck, causing it to turn insane and drive the truck into the lake. The boy then dies after the lake floods the town. Also you die too.
I wish for a goat.
Granted, but you are brutally murdered by crazed fans.
I wish I looked terrifyingly perfect.
Granted, but then you'd have a lot of jealous friends. (assuming you're a girl)
I wish to be a genius.
Granted, but I'll destroy the cult because I hate foam :)
I wish I was more happy.
Granted, but you'll never smile.
I wish I was more social.
Granted, but you'll have less time to self-reflect and think.
I wish I could find something more in my life.
Granted, but that something more happens to be your death.
I wish I had my own private observatory.
Granted, bot you'd have to take the time to maintain all the equipment.
*but
I wish I could just sit down and finish a storygame.
(I'm glad you guys like the game)
Granted, but you won't be able to make anymore.
I wish I could find a rhyming dictionary.
Granted, but all the pages have been torn out.
I wish I didn't have a papercut.
Granted but it'll be broken.
I wish I didn't have a cold.
Granted, but instead, you have a lethal disease.
I wish I had some carrot cake.
Granted, but rabbits will come and eat it.
I wish more people would read my favorite book, Sisters Red.
Granted, but they will all hate it and mock you for liking it.
I wish I had a pet halibut.
Granted, but you forget what everything else is.
I wish I had known about this game earlier
Granted, but I will mind control you when you're making them.
I wish I had a gigantic knife.
Granted, but every actor will be replaced by Nicolas Cage (yes, the female ones too).
I wish I had a car.
Granted, but she dies on the first day you meet.
I wish my telephone wouldn't run out of batteries!
Granted, but he permenantly looses access to internet.
I wish Ugilick would regain access to the internet.
Granted, but it will download and upload at 1 byte a day.
I wish my neighbors were not crazy stalker.
stalkers*
Granted, but now they're crazy cultists and want to sacrifice you to their god.
I wish to go into space.
Granted, but you'll never return.
I wish I was Batman.
Granted, but your power is to be breathe magma...but you don't get any invulnerability from magma along with it.
I wish I was invulnerable to magma.
Gain resistance to heat and become vulnerable to cold? Do I sense a HP reference there? Haha.
Granted, but you loose your sense of "what's best to do", causing you to use your newfound discipline to be...well...kind of wasted.
Granted, but it hates you and impales your chest with it's horn.
I wish The internet would be faster.
Granted, but you are returned to the phase of being an infant and will remain that way for the rest of your elongated life.
I wish I didn't require sleep.
Granted, but thereafter, jazz was replaced with jizz, leading to a racial rebellion in America.
I wish the next person to post will admit he or she is an asshole.
Granted, but despite what I say, everyone will consider me to be awesome.
I wish everyone considered be to be awesome.
Granted, but Awesome as in the troll.
I wish I was rich.
Granted, but you'll be dead.
I wish I could do magic.
Granted, but another magic user turns you into a newt, and you stay that way forever.
I wish for a pet newt.
Granted, but he would run away the next day!
I wish for ideas!
Granted, but it is extremely burned!
I wish for a better artistic talent!
Granted, But you loose your five senses.
I wish I could do everything superfast.
Granted, but you still lose.
I wish for tree.
Granted, but it grows and expands around the entire planet, killing you and everyone you know.
I wish I could charge electronics by touching them.
Granted, but they always break.
I wish my car got stolen
Granted, but you can't eat it.
I wish for my local team to win.
Granted, but that doesn't happen until after you're dead.
I wish I could cook something well for once.
Granted, but you are the only one who could taste it.
I wish that spaceships were for personal use.
Granted, but they go slower than snails.
I wish my hair would stop growing and remain in perfect length.
Granted, it will look and taste delicious, but it won't be made of chocolate or flour. In fact, you could say FUDge.
I wish I could time travel.
Granted, but you would age depending on the relation of the time to your lifetime.
I wish for a forest cabin.
Granted, but it is surrounded by gigantic flesh-eating, invisible monsters.
I wish I had a loyal flesh eating invisible monster for a pet.
Granted, but it gets run over because of it's invisibility.
I wish noone will reply to this
Declines, because someone has to reply for the wish to be granted.
I wish I could see through solid objects.
Granted, but you wouldn't see anything but gases.
I wish I could shoot lasers out of my hands
Granted, but you have no control over them.
I wish for a cat.
Granted, but it is 1/2 centimeter wide.
I wish flies found me repulsive and would stay away from me.
Granted, but now you're a haven for mosquitoes.
I wish my alarm went off this morning.
Granted, but it would never it won't stop ringing.
I wish for time.
Granted, but you can only fastforward during the moments you want to enjoy.
I wish Mass Effect 3 was out already!!!
Granted, But shops never had any in stock for you due to demand
I Wish I was 6 Foot 2
Granted, but your neck covers 5 feet of that.
I wish I got top grades for all my classes.
Granted, but the stress caused by having to get the top grades eventually leads you to depression.
I wish I had a hen that layed golden eggs
Granted but before the hen can lay an egg it will be eaten by a giant snake.
I wish I could write a story that people like and review.
Granted, but we all refuse to read it.
I wish for a glass of water
Granted, but its salt water.
I wish for a fish and a good time with a rhyme.
Granted, but the fish is dead and the good time is someone else's. In short, you've been raped.
I wish for more good music
Granted but before you get it you go deaf.
I wish this sandwich was not so spicy.
Granted, but I eat it. It wasn't so bad.
I wish I could get away with murder
Granted but the person you killed comes back to haunt you forever.
I wish I could afford to go to college
Granted but within the year it comes crashing back down.
I wish trolls didn't exist.
Granted but now murderers take place of all the trolls.
I wish I won a newberry award.
Granted, but your business literally goes of the ground and lands on boxes of dynamite and explode.
I wish I could have a million awesome books.
Granted but they burn in a horrible fire.
I wish someone would have replied to my previous wish
I did.
I wish I am popular.
Granted but an obsessed fan murders you
I wish I had more time to do things
But your time costs you money, so you go broke and then you are homeless, and you starve to death.
I wish I was white, so people would like me better.
Granted but then everyone assumes you are racist to all other minorities.
I wish I could be with the one I love
Granted, but you loose all your five senses during that time.
I wish the post that is at the bottom of this thread would disappear.
Granted but it's replaced by one more obnoxiously annoying (if possible)
I wish that life wasnt so cruel
HEY SHOULD I START THIS GAME AGAIN AND GIVE CREDIT TO THE PERSON WHO ORIGINALLY STARTED IT?
Granted but, wait I forgot what you wrote so...it just doesn't come true.
I wish I would think before I post something, because sometimes I really sound stupid.
Granted but you would forget what you thought before you could use it.
I wish I could forget a few things
Granted but it's all you can eat for the rest of your life.
I wish I wasn't tired all the time.
Granted instead he busted out your windows.
I wish to be happy
Granted, but you are so happy, that you become distracted, and fall off a cliff and die.
I wish that I didn't take the time to read every single one of these before I posted.
Granted, intead you never join in on the fun.
I wish for a wish that would cancel out my first wish.
Granted, but it cancels out itself as well, so you get the wish back
I wish for sausage balls
Granted, but no one could think of a witty retort.
I wish fo a lifetime supply of twizzlers.
Granted, but you die of a heart attack two day's later.
I wish that i knew what twizzlers were.
Granted, but your mind is overloaded with information on twizzlers that it explodes going -insert awesome exploding and *splatt* sound effects-
I wish I could spontaneously make awesome sound effects.
Granted, but you can't communicate in any other way. Ever seen Bumblebee from tranformers? You're a smaller, less imposing him now :)
I wish I could get these polyatomic ions memorized already!
Granted, but you are erased from history for it.
I wish that Skyrim would be a horrible game and i would get it on the day after the release.
(Well my wish didn't work out...)
Granted, but a meteor hit's the planet a few week's later.
I wish I could play God for a day.
Granted, but you will end up breaking it as soon as you hold it.
I wish I had great television.
Granted by you will come back as a zombie.
I wish I knew what happened in the afterlife without dying.
Granted but it bursts into flames
I wish I didnt have to sleep
Granted but you'll go insane.
I wish I had enough courage to sing in front of other people.
Granted but you're horrible at it
I wish I wasnt so tired
Granted but you'll accidentally use the power against your family.
I wish someone would start another PBM game again.
(PS, that's pretty stupid, guy :P)
Granted, but the Homeland Security gets a hold of it and you're sent to Guantanamo
I wish for the golden ticket
Granted but it's so heavy it breaks everything it's on top of.
I wish I could have a comfortable bed.
Granted, but it turns on you and makes you regret it.
I wish I had a robot-servant.
Granted, but you have to donate blood every day for the rest of your life.
I wish that I a thousand wish's
Declined...
I wish for a wish that wouldn't not make my life not miserable.
That wouldn't not make your life not miserable? The triple negative confuses the genie and he explodes.
I wish my genie wouldn't explode.
Granted, but a virus infect's the new Pirkuy mutant race and is spread throughout much of the human population. It develops into a zombie-base virus and the beginning of the end begin's... All because of your wish.
I wish Dragon's were real and i was friends with them.
Granted, they are your friends, but they hate everyone else and so they eat the rest of humanity.
I wish I had the force.
Granted, but all of humanity becomes zombies.
I wish that tables were baskets.
Granted, but you will have to do it again!
I wish I could get rid of my writer's block.
Granted, but the cookies are filled with food poisening and you die from an overdose.
I wish to become God and erase all the post's that didn't start with "Granted or Declined"
Granted but they are posted back up seconds later.
I wish for a frisbee.
granted, but it has sharp edges and cuts your fingers off when yo catch it.
I wish I could think of something to wish for.
Granted, but since that wish to think of it came true...you ran out of wishes D:
I wish I had a cute puppy.
Granted but it eats your cat
I wish my cay would get stuck in a tree
Granted, but since cay is not something we know of the universe buckles under itself trying to find out and explode's...
I wish for a slice of bacon that i can eat without dieing or anyother permanet disability or being poisened.
Granted, but as you eat it, you discover that the slice of bacon has absolutely no flavor.
I wish I had a day off today.
Granted but you fall asleep and wake up tomorrow.
I wish that I ruled my own empire and nobody attacked me.
Granted, but you have no power... and no limbs.
I wish to have many AIDSy, old hookers.
Granted, but now you live in perpetual nothingness, lost and without a purpose. On the bright side you do actually ahve less to do
I wish for mustard.... smeared on all my walls
Granted but you go into a coma for the rest of your life, eventually your family cut's the life support and you die.
I wish that my Civilization IV game wouldn't freeze so much.
Granted, but now in your existing games and any new ones you start, you spawn right beside a hostile barbarian village.
I wish I wasn't currently being plagued by an idea I can't write down.
^(I alreay use my world editor to do that)
Granted, but you forget what you're idea was.
I wish for a bowl of vanilla ice-cream.
Granted but they burn you
I wish I had a car that has already broken down and is unable to explode.
Granted but it's not on the calendar.
I wish people would stop commenting on my grammar.
Granted but you break your fingers and are no longer able to write
I wish people would stop hatin on llamas
You lived in a fantasy world your mind created for you. So in a way, you lived and died inside the dream.