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I was just wondering what side of the war everyone is on.

I'm a neutral party, offering support to the underdog so that the balance of power is always shifting, that way anarchy is the real winner. And since I support anarchy (when it comes to Penguin vs Mustache), I win too! Besides, if I don't take sides now, I can claim to have been supporting whoever wins THE WHOLE TIME! (Insert evil laugh here)

It depends on which party is Pro-Bacon.

Would you rather have sizzling bacony goodness, or Kosher Bacon (AKA processed dove parts)?

...?

Since I too have a mustache I guess my loyalty goes to Aman. Sorry penguin.

I will clearly win this war.

Not without your toaster. Mwuhahahahaha!

I'm confused :/

Although, if you told me to pick a side even though I have no idea what's going on here, I'd pick penguins. Just because they're cooler ^_^ Well, I like those really thin, puny Asiany imperial mustaches too :)

Edit: Scrap that. My army of flaming wolves will obviously win this thing and eat all of you guys up :D

Well Berka and Aman have this war like thing going on and Penguins (Berka) are at war with Mustaches (Aman) while many have sided with both sides while even more remain neutral while some like me provide both with secret supplies and my underground city sells tunnel's and sabotages' when one is close to winning so we keep making money :D

For the best explanation, play this storygame (warning, it’s very challenging… plus you can pick sides at the end  ^-^ )

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/kill-aman's-mustache

 

Sorry Aman, I think I'm on the Penguin side. They're just cooler. GO PENGUINS! 

the beta's agree to follow the penguin as long as he doesn't eat us. (penguins are vile fish killers)

Ooh! I wouldn't touch that creepy undead fish thingie you stuck in my game with a ten-foot Aman's Mustache!

heh heh

They both suck. they just don't compare to the awesomeness of beards.

Tell me about it ^-^

Have you seen my soul patch? It may not be as great as my 'stache, but it does look better then BZ's lame beard.

I'm with whoever can burn his opponent the most so seeing how Aman and Berka do so to eachother a lot I tend to be a constant-turncoat. xD

GO POLAR BEARS!

...

Wait, what? No polar bears? What kind of war doesn't have polar bears...? 

The kind where polar bears work with me selling merchandise to both sides they provide the muscle to event the odds

My flaming wolves shall help the penguins burn the mustaches to a crisp, then kill the penguins in their sleep >:D

Awesome game you got there, Berk :D Still trying to figure it out so far...

My team of gorrillas are a staunch supporters of penguins. Amans mustaches are poop!

Well I have decided that my city is full golem's (after all the original Hugo) and satyrs' (also in the book) That are trader's the golem's provide the muscle (after all they are made of stone and clay)

My wolves side with the Penguins due to how awesome they are. And they do not approve of Raywolf's actions xD

So wolves on fire will have to go through gorillas and wolves to kill the penguins which I am assuming have some heavy duty weapons.

Hehe.

My flaming wolves shall win this pointless fight! :D

But technically I'm on Berk's side til total extermination of the mustaches is complete. Then I'll begin the total extermination of penguins >:D

Obviously nobody knows about this plan as I'm not stupid enough to post this in a forum on a public site where the whole world's people can view. Duh.

So basically this is what I've gathered...

Berka's Side

awesomeness
betaband
galobtter
Lexi

Aman's Side

JMgskills
Raywolf

Neutral

playa (can be bought with bacon)
Xt (though his love of polar bears might suggest penguin leanings who also live in cold climate)
Amy (Enjoying the chaos)
Fireplay (Enjoying the chaos)
hugo (Taking advantage of the chaos)
frank (Truly non-aligned due to love of beards)
KillaRobot (Toasterless "third side")

And your just enjoying the show too? lol

Pretty sure he falls into "Enjoying the Chaos" side at the very least lol.

Everyone knows once I'm re-united with my toaster this war is as good as done.

Can't you just... You know, buy a new one? *hides*

Yay taking advantage of this war is proving profitable. :D

All the more reason for me to keep it's true location a heavily guarded secret.

Actually, I'm taking advantage of the chaos too (but that's not to say I don't enjoy it)!

Eh...? Since when was I on Aman's side?

Like I said...I'm on the penguin's side until all the mustaches are wiped out. Then I'll be the new arch-enemy of Berk >:)

Add me to BZ's side sorry JMgskillz but you choose wrong did and ray we wil murder you if step out against us. Lexi thank you for the support of the wolves and Hugo pick a side!

.....Wait one second. There is sides to this conflict? I thought it was just BZ and I murdering each other..........

Technically you have supporters to your cause and you make a great TV show. lol

Mustaches and penguins killing each other while other parties do the same no kidding. (How would you kill a mustache?)

What do you think they put this up for?

Joining my cult for a day? 

What?!? I would never! It's for being a Low Down Dirty Mustache Murderer!

(you don't still have those incriminating photos do you?)

Of course, of course BZ.

(I'll delete them for a price)

... *crickets

I dunno, my pict doesn't have a stache yet....

Looks like some people joined my cause.

Can you do mine? I'm dying to see what Naruto looks like with a stache.

Gave him a Chevron, so it covers a huge portion of the face. We need a mustache Smiley though. :{)

Berka is being overwhelmed her take some golem's (they can take a hell of a beating) I still want a profit this is just to keep the war going.

That just won't do!  It needs to be friendly mutton chops!

OMG...

Stachified Naruto in Tailed Beast Mode...we have a seriously dangerous opponent here...

Aman's secret weapon....

Holy crap.....

Bravo my friend, bravo. There's no way you can lose now.(In response to mustached Naruto)

It was already a lock once he gained the support of Bacon. Nobody beats Bacon.

^ Deep.

True dat.

Ha ha, nice try, but the advantage of not having a face is not having to be bothered with facial hair.

Officially I'm neutral.

Unofficially, all the death Berka and Aman's armies are causing is just strengthening my own position. And people like Amy, Fireplay and hugo are just making things even better because they're prolonging the war even longer resulting in more death by constantly switching sides or selling weapons.

It's SOUL hair. It's your soul yerning to join with the Mustache clan, it's just that you don't realize it yet. 

Hey! Just because I am prolonging the war doesn't mean I am not prepared ever since I heard about this war my city has been fortifying its position and creating escape routes. (Besides we keep the best weapons for ourselves)

Yeah. And the best thing about that is, if you win, I can claim that was my intention the whole time! ;D

what if I were to say that I have succeeded in making an invincible penguin/mustache hybrid called penaches

Evil. Pure EVIL.

How much to buy the blueprint, rights, and prototype? :D

Don't worry, my people are working on a Bacon, penguin and mustache hybrid. They will be called Benstachpen's

I think all sides will fight to destroy such a creation.

i got amans back *uses demigod powers to build a giant army of polar bears*

("sends out the Penaches to destroy polar bear army")

("the ensuing battle destroys the north pole")

*uses powers to morph into a fire wolf and sneaks into berks bedroom and slits his wrists*

Penguins don't have wrists, you are captured on the crime of failed assassination.

God Stache saves Chasemeee

chasmee then prays to his father for more power and for aman to have a army of  mustaches that know the penguins weakness and chasmees father say thy shal be done and chasmee starts to float and amans army comes forth and says thy biding master aman

Giving Berka a massive missile that causes all hair to fall off anyone in the vicinity.

Disarms the missile as I send a Kitsune to stop Godstache

Nope best tech in the buisiness rotating code and requires physical hacking.

chasemee flys to berk city and then fly to the edge of space and then flys at full speed to the ground in berk city a levels the city

begins working on building more penaches to destroy chasemee.

chasemeee likes clubbing seals too, when she's not busy slitting penguin wrists and punching babies.

She even punches babies with mustaches.

(The Shame!)

(I found it hilarious, but for each his own)

No wonder your Staches are such drooling fools - too much punching when they were babies!

Ya dont need a brain when you are a stache.

And it shows 

you know im a dude right?

Really? The broomstick totally threw me off  ;)

lol why dont you just go back to jacking off to reruns of oprah

Reruns?!? Where have you been? She has a whole Network now.

you would know

AHAH! So you admit I was right about your Gender!

(Cause I "would know")...

 

... *crickets...

Harry Potter fan?

But just before you hit the city, a gorrilla godzilla hybrid catches you in midair and crushes you. Bwahahahaha

A mechagorilla Godzilla smashes into you controlled by stayr's and back upped by giant stone golem's they have advertising things posted on their backs.

In the name of Bacon, I say we all join sides to destroy this monstrosity. How anyone could dare possess the audacity to create such a thing is beyond me, but I shall not let it continue to live in agony.

It's a machine not even alive.

IT IS AN ABOMINATION! 

you support chaos right? that's all i need :)

(send's the bruised and battered penaches prototype to fireplay)

War update:

Aman's side

chaseme
JMGskills
playa (bought with bacon and assimilated)
Raywolf
Swiftstrike (assimilated)

Berka's side

awesomeness
betaband
galobtter
Lexi
Xt (Penguin leanings)

Chaos side

Amy
Drakilian (Unleashing new monstrosities)
Fireplay
hugo

True Neutral

frank (Hates all sides)
KillaRobot (Still looking for toaster)

There should be a Pyromania fraction, since we have so many members with a affinity to fire.

Hell, I'd join that shit!

Killa, I may have a proposition for you.

It involves your toaster.

Once again...I have never said that I was on Aman's side o.o

Go Pyromania faction! :D

It's OK Raywolf, I'm not on Aman's side either  ^-^

Did somebody say Pyro Faction?!?

A new faction has been created!
The Pyro faction has appeared!

Raywolf has rebelled against Aman
Raywolf has joined the Pyro faction
SilverFlame has join the Pyro faction

Pyromanic faction begins lighting fires

playa has propositioned  Killa Robot

Amy has sold weapons to the penguin army
hugo has sold weapons to the mustache army
Fireplay has stolen weapons from both sides
Fireplay has moved the toaster

Drakilian has created a new abomination!
Drakilian has unleashed the abomination into the world!

Abomination attacks the penguin army with its Whiskers of DOOM!
Abomination does 2842 points of damage!

betaband has been gruesomely decapitated!
betaband has been killed!
Xt has been seriously wounded!
Xt has lost a leg!
Xt hops behind cover

Abomination attacks the mustache army with its Beak of DESTRUCTION!
Abomination has done 4292 points of damage!

chaseme has been bloodily evicerated!
chaseme has been killed!
JMGskills has been critically wounded!
JMGskilled has lost two arms!
JMGskills has fallen unconscious
Abomination has eaten JMGskills and mutated!
Abomination gains a new power: Regeneration

Abomination attacks the chaos league with its Flippers of DEATH!

Abomination misses Fireplay
Abomination misses Fireplay
Abomination misses Amy
Abomination misses Amy
Abomination hits hugo's golem army for 4235 points of damage!
hugo is defenseless!
Abomination hits hugo for 3953 points of damage!
hugo has been utterly annihilated!

Abomination moves closer toward the Pyro faction…

>_

*puts down flamethrower. *runs away screaming.

 

We can wait no longer. Killa, you are the only person who knows the true power of your toaster. I give you the real one I've had in my possession all along (Unlike Fireplay's mere copy) in hopes that you may use it to destroy the Abomination. 

I say we all take up something less dangerous - like knitting.

Team up to defeat Abomination?

Hmm... We'll, I'd like to see a little more mayhem first, but if it starts to get out of hand... Sure, why not?  ^-^

Oh crap, oh crap, the controls I put into the abomination are starting to malfunction, guys, I can't control it anymore, EVERYBODY RUN!!!!!!!

(sets secret research lab to self destruct, in the hopes that the explosion will destroy the abomination when it comes to kill me)

(takes designs for new and improved self destruct button to work on in backup lab in the moon)

(that's right, IN the moon, not on it)

Pyromania survives without even doing shit.

 

 

*Reactives old space-fleet from past forum. Heads to moon and opens fire...*

"I have decided to go independent, sorry fellow pyros the calling of the Snarl is too great. I must obey!

*Continues to fire in hopes of destroying Drakilian...*

"Activates shields and begins build a modified version of the self destruction button that will destroy the abomination"

FIREPLAY YOU TRAITOR!!

"activates the bomb hidden inside the penaches prototype given to fireplay, destroying the ship he is on, sadly he escapes to another ship"

 

the original penaches is now dead, you've got your wish aman. :'(

 

So that's what the weird object was... Anyways, I think I should mention that I'm the one who changed your programing so you would lose control of the abomination. :)

*Decides to leave and colonize Mars.* 

Ah screw it *hits a button on his magic control all my cool guns board* all my weapons not being used to defend my city melt sorry NO REFUNDS!!! I like fire but put me on really neutral.

You know I'm team penguin. :Y

I think at this point it doesn't matter. lol

Oh. SHORT ATTENTION SPAN!

Berka panics and runs in terror!
Aman panics and runs in terror!

Penguin army is leaderless and in disarray!
Mustache army is leaderless and in disarray!

awesomeness is trampled by fleeing penguins!
awesomeness takes 846 points of damage!
awesomeness has been flattened and killed!

Lexi loses wolves to penguin stampede!
Lexi avoids damage

galobtter loses gorillas to penguin stampede!
galobtter trips and takes one point of damage

Xt is trampled by fleeing penguins!
Xt takes 586 points of damage!
Xt has been flattened and killed!

Swiftstrike has been attacked by wild mustaches!
Swiftstrike takes 853 points of damage!
Swiftstrike has been strangled to death!

Amy laughs at the carnage and skips away

Fireplay's fleet assaults Drakilian's moon base!
Surface of the moon base takes 6943 points of damage!
The screams of women and children dying in the blasts lowers morale!

Moon base fires on Fireplay's fleet!
Fireplay's fleet takes 3486 points of damage!
Drakilian activates kill switch for the original penache
Fireplay's personal ship EXPLODES spectacularly!
Fireplay sacrifices crew to run to escape pod
Fireplay takes 25 points of damage!
Fireplay escapes in pod

Pyro faction puts up fire shield
Abomination attacks Pyro faction with Handlebar Fu Manchu COMBO!
Fire shield fails!

Silverflame takes 8439 points of damage!
Silverflame has been horribly killed!

Raywolf takes OVER 9000 points of damage!
Raywolf's death screams are legendary even in Hell!
Raywolf has died.

playa has given the toaster to Killa Robot
playa eats bacon
playa gains 2 hitpoints

nitro has joined Berka's faction

>_

Holy Mustache God Sheild?

"activates super super secret escape wormhole to travel to untouched parallel universe, and then activates several series of explosions which destroy the earth in hopes of annihilating the abomination and stranding Fireplay out to die"

Oh. My. God.

Berka zerka supports mustaches in this universe, and aman supports penguins

THIS IS ALL WRONG!

"orders what's left of the penache army to self-destruct, then I stand in the middle of the explosion. Drakilian is no more"

GAME OVER (for me, i think some people might survive this)

 

 

So, umm, Killa do you want to activate your toaster now?

Either he has not turned on the news recently or he's waiting for the majority of us to die.

*Continues with colonization program: Martian Empire*

*Sends half of fleet to attack moon base.*

"in a far away universe, ashes are gathering together to form a creature the likes of which has never been seen by the worlds before"

To bad it dosen't have a portal to reach us, it exploded it's inter-dimensional device remember? >:D

Help us Killa, you're our only hope! *whir whir whir...

Help us Killa, you're our only hope! *whir whir whir...

Help us Killa, you're our only hope! *whir whir whir... *Clunk!!!

Hmm... I'm really going to have to get that droid fixed...

Drakilian has opened up a rift in the space time continuum!
Drakilian has gone insane from things man was not meant to know!
Drakilian commits suicide!
Drakilian has died

Fireplay colonizes Mars
Fireplay founds a new Empire!
Fireplay's fleet attacks moon base
Moonbase is defenseless!
Moonbase is utterly destroyed!

Achievement unlocked: Final Frontier

EndMaster raises zombie awesomeness to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie betaband to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie chaseme to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie Drakilian to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie hugo to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie Raywolf to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie Swiftstrike to join undead legion
EndMaster raises zombie Xt to join undead legion

EndMaster calls back Amy
EndMaster calls back Fireplay

Amy has completed a quest! (Sewing the chaos)
Amy has leveled up!
New power gained: Shapeshift

Fireplay has completed a quest! (Sewing the chaos)
Fireplay has leveled up!
New power gained: Metal manipulation

Fireplay has FAILED a quest! (Securing the toaster)
Fireplay has been demoted a level!
Metal manipulation lost

Berka regroups
Aman regroups

Berka and Aman call a truce
Achievement unlocked: Best Friends Forever

Killa Robot is asleep
Killa Robot snores loudly through the thunderous footsteps of the Abomination

>_

"drakilian's ashes form into the first lich to ever exist. events from endmaster's "necromancer" pass in alternate universe"

"Drakilian travels back to the martian colony, which has now evolved into a great empire, in order to finally wreak revenge upon the traitor fireplay"

 

(if that's okay with endmaster, if not i'll find another way to destroy fireplay, eventually)

Well the lich part would make sense since endmaster just raised you from the dead.

Also how am I a traitor? I just want to continue sewing chaos. :D

Aman goes up to mustache heaven to ask for Mustache Godly help.

BZ gets a really really long ladder to follow Aman - wearing his clip-on Stache so as not to offend the Facial God of Macho Awesome.

You do realize this is all EndMaster's Fault right?

Nope, its Amy's for dividing us up, and giving Endmaster the chance.

Well, dividing up them at least - we were always sort of divided to begin with hehe...

Probably. I find it distasteful to work with you.

Aman and berka separate when aman calls upon mustache god to destroy ladder and the war ends with the death of berka?

Then I'd have to kill Endmaster by myself, and even my mustachey goodness can't beat that.

oh, well since endamster technically resurrected me and i am his now eternal servant (along with pretty much everyone the abomination destroyed)  we now must destroy you and berka, as well as the deserter fireplay

I am so sorry, it was never meant to be like this (the corpses and spirits of all of the dead resurrected by endmaster rise towards mustache heaven in order to defend their master)

Hmmm, strangely enough, no one has attacked amy yet.

I wonder what killa's doing right now?

According to some stories he is the physical form of Death itself. That or he kicked a "god" of sorts out and became a god of Shadows who learned necromancy. 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! CHAOS!

Ha, no, really, this has gone to far. AWESOME TEAM UP TIME!

We're off to defeat the Abomination, the horrible Abomination of CYS!

Wait, that doesn't fit the tune at all.

Wait, what exactly am I being called back for? o.O

*Begins to prepare colonization program: Moon-Guard.*

*Looks for new quest...*

Actually I need to stop anyway, I was working on Eternal and I got really distracted.

To sum up:

So it was that Aman and Berka climbed up the mountain top and asked the great mustache god for divine help.

And the pleas were heard.

The vile abomination was utterly destroyed with a great hot blob of divine mustache wax before it could cause anymore destruction

And there was much rejoicing.

The remnants of Berka's tribe settled down and lived in peace with Aman's tribe and while the two never mingled (For fear of unleashing another abomination) the two managed to treat each other with respect.

To this day both tribes curse the name of Drakilian though.

Drakilian continued his personal vendetta against Fireplay and the two continue to war. Sometimes with one having the upper hand, but it never lasted since Amy sold weapons to both sides to ensure nobody got an advantage.

Killa never did activate his toaster and only woke up long after all the chaos had died down. He was confused to as how it came back to him, but then he just shrugged his shoulders and knew not to question such good luck.

As for those that died, they were claimed by EndMaster as all the dead always are.

And thus ended the FIRST Mustache-Penguin War…

THE END

Restart? Reload? Quit?

Quit

OK

> READY_

That was a good game, maybe we should get the 2nd edition.

*dodges death-bolt from drakilian and sends soldiers to slow him down. retreats with fleet back to mars.*

Yeah, I'm taking my beach ball and going home! Aman got his dirty mustache prints all over it...

If I had activated it the war would have ended very differently!

So were you watching us or were you just busy at the time?

I was otherwise preoccupied lol.

I'm true neutral anyway though :D

Endmaster should run a forum game when he's free...

This Thread should be Bronzed or something....  ^-^

I second this!

3rdeded...

I also declare support for berka/chaos in the inevitable 2nd war, which will probably happen once someone new joins the site and berka disses aman's mustache. 

What? I would never diss that glorious tuft of nostril poofery! We're like best buds now.

*used car salesman smile....

I expanded my city to cover all subterranean levels right down to the planets core!!! Any of you mustache and penguins get fighting I got my special button only I know what it does...

blows up the earth by unleashing the immense power contained in the earth's core?

Well since it really doesn't effect either of us and the war as already over I don't see what he would gain from blowing himself up.

Also most of his empire would have already melted if he reached the core. Just saying...

Someone really needs to make an epic Storygame out of this whole time of chaos...

Especially since I'm gonna try to take over the world of the Dead... 

We are inventors made many suits to protect from heat. No it doesn't  blow up the earths core. And I didn't say went to the very core and we are simply tapping into it to provide geothermal electricity for the whole world.

"hugo's people die of asbestos poisoning"

Nice try the golems are made of stone and such beside we have are own water and food supply inside the city. Another point how did you get in every entrance is guarded and we have sensor's monitoring any seismic activity.

Still doesn't explain what you gain from blowing up the planet... 

All that would do is make Drakilian, Endmaster, and myself the only survivors of this entire war.

Trot the last time the button does not blow up the planet. It doesn't do anything harmful per say.also 

endmaster I am not a zombie I never died kept the best weapons and armor for ourselves.

If end said you died, you better just role with it.

Anyhow, this was interesting.

Lol Don't deny end he will eat your soul

Lol my soul is in a jar by my bed I only let I out when it Need's a walk ;)

So your saying we can just catch it when you let it outside?

Anyways, lets just keep the war closed for now. Endmaster or Aman/Berka can start the 2nd one if they want.

*burst.back into the world with my mustached father screams it is time to end this*

... Presses the button.

It happend that one of my gorrilas sabbotaged the button and made the core do fusion. Me and my gorrillas was on another planet though.

Wrong!!! It transfers the earth 30 000 light years away to a different galaxy full of peace loving aliens.

dude don't any of you get it we are the cutting edge of science, technology and mechanics anything you use against us was invented by us so we have a defense against it.

I have a teleporter that can teleport anything anywhere. We teleported the button away and replaced it with a button that connected to machine that fused the core. We developed it using a time machine. We kept on going back and doing more work on it thereby making the BEST technology ever. We made dragons...

Seconded, if we start a war without them then it's really just going to be a bunch of guys describing awesome imaginary stuff with no purpose, as long as end master narrates the results and berka and Aman fight prejudicial mustache penguins wars, then our involvement makes sense

We dont need endmaster, there have been many skirmishes without him.

I'd survive too, because I'M ONE OF THE DEMONS THAT DON'T. DIE.

Wow...I guess alot happened while I was away huh O_o. 

Now that there's a new Pyro faction...how could I not betray Berk? >:D

Me and Raywolf's Firewolf City shall crush everything in its path. I'm not dead yet xD

I'm probably gonna get shot for asking but how did this war begin I am fairly new here and Don't know the history. Please informeth me

-Aman & Berka first meet.

-First comment war.

-Forum game battles.

-First war

-Update on first war and ending of first war.

-(unoffical?) 2nd war did start but is put on the backburner.

Why thank you good sir ??

Reading the actual threads that spawned this running gag helps but you're welcome.