BerkaZerka, The Million Word Malkavian

Member Since

11/22/2011

Last Activity

3/23/2023 1:38 PM

EXP Points

infinite

Post Count

13339

Storygame Count

9

Duel Stats

0 wins / 0 losses

Order

Lauded Sage Exemplar

Commendations

977

Mind's Eye USA

 

 

 

 

Trophies Earned

Administrative contributions. Having 4 Storygame(s) Featured Having Infinite Points Posting 13339 Forum Posts Rated 96.8% of all Stories Given by alexp on 02/22/2013 - For being all-around awesome! Given by BerkaZerka on 01/09/2017 - In memorial of mustache wars long long ago~ Given by EndMaster on 05/31/2013 - For Dead Man Walking, Dungeon Stompage and whatever other cool stories you end up creating. Given by JJJ-thebanisher on 10/14/2013 - Great site presence and top notch AE usage Given by Killa_Robot on 12/10/2019 - For showing everyone what the advanced editor was capable of and being a pretty cool dude Given by madglee on 04/04/2014 - Exceptional stories and great moderator! Great work, BZ! Enjoy. Given by mizal on 01/07/2020 - For some of the greatest stories on the site, many years of thankless modding, Ansonia, and being the last bastion of wholesomeness. Given by Sethaniel on 06/14/2014 - Great moderator, amazing game-maker. Given by Will11 on 01/15/2017 - For the fantastic stories, amazing scripting and overall contributions to the site

Storygames

Chuck Norris Quiz

How well do you know the Incredible Facts About The Awesome Chuck Norris?

25 Questions with Scoring
 

Featured Story Cows vs. Aliens!

Farmer Brown is on vacation and it's up to Fernando El Fantastico the Bull (that's you!) to save his Herd when Aliens come to harvest them!

(by playing draw poker against a horde of moronic alien invaders!)

Special Thanks to Killa_Robot for playtesting feedback - This Meep's For him! ^v^

Crab Arena!

You are Crab Trainer X! Choose your Crustacean Combatant and Battle for Glory in Crab Arena! The Championship Belt is within your Grasp! Can You Do It? Hell Yes You Can!

Now GO!!!

 

How To Play

Fight 3 Round Battles with 4 Opponents; and then a 5 Round Battle with the Final Opponent. Each Round you choose an Attack and an Elemental Focus to power it.
 
CLAW HAMMER beats Body Slam / BODY SLAM beats Double Snip / DOUBLE SNIP beats Claw Hammer
 
FIRE consumes Air / WATER puts out Fire / EARTH soaks up Water / AIR blows away Earth
 
A Color-Coded Bar shows the results between the Attacks and Focuses: Green = Win; Yellow = Draw; Red = Lose
 
Your Attack determines who Wins the Round; the Elemental Focus determines how much Damage you will take and how many Power Points you will gain. Your Wins and Losses at the end of each Battle determine whether you advance or go down in flames.
Featured Story Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival)

Can you survive the Zombie Apocalypse? While challenging, it's not as hard as the movies would have you believe - where they always make the worst possible decisions for the sake of drama. At least here, you will be offered logical choices amid the foolhardy and your character cares about survival even more than you do. A serious game with gory detail.

Cameos (try to find them all!)
Aman: Hairy bearded sledge guy
applegirl: Coffee mug zombie teen
Betaband: Neighbor’s fish tank brought to you by Betaband
CovElite: The Cannibal Gaunt Zombie
EndMaster: A survivor tells about seeing a black hooded man walking among the zombie hordes and directing them like death itself
Fireplay: A madman with a taste for fire
JMgskills: A zombie wearing a red shirt with the logo “YOU DIED – END GAME.”
Marmotlord: A School Mascot on the run
playa988: A rather short, buzz-cut, zombie in a baggy white t-shirt and jeans that gets sniped
simplesabley: Tomboy survivor girl
SindriV: A mysterious corpse in the street
Solxd7: A police officer shit out of luck
Swiftstryker: Zombie in a speedo
ThisisBo: An oddly “talkative” zombie not terribly interested in eating brains
ugilick: Karate kicking conquistador

Special Thanks To:
Aman; AtomicWaste; blob; Briar_Rose; HoraceTorys; MBrock; playa988; ugilick

(For their invaluable feedback and playtesting efforts!)

Featured Story Delve!

Slay Monsters and Loot the Bodies!

100 levels of Classic Dungeon-Crawl Hack & Slash!
Can you survive all the way to the end?

A CYS "Flash Game" Featuring -
Weapon Upgrades, Magic Items, NPCs, and more!

Featured Story Dungeon Stompage!

An Item and Character-Stat driven Dungeon Adventure Challenge! Can you survive the perils, defeat the monsters, and win the game?

 

Special Thanks To:

JMgskills, simplesabley; betaband; Swiftstryker; madglee; October; & urnam0 (who found a second solution to the puzzle chest)

(For their invaluable feedback and playtesting efforts!)

Kill Aman's Mustache

Do you have what it takes to survive the Wrath of Aman's Mustach of Doom?

Are you clever enough to outwit a Penguin with a mallet? Are you man enough to wear a phony mustache? Are you Anime enough to put on a Pikachu suit and head to Vegas?

Find Out Now, In: Kill Aman’s Mustache!

A horror(ble) puzzle of hairy implications with a side of lice...

Note that embedded audio requires windows media player plug-in to hear. You will likely be prompted to allow it if you don't already have it installed.
 
(Please don't be mean and Rate this game poorly just because it’s a worthless piece of crap. Seriously - you will totally hurt the feelings of the thirteen year old orphan schoolgirl from Korea that I hired to write this and who has very little grasp of grammar and doesn’t speak any Engrish and is dying of toenail cancer – you heartless brutes.)

 

So You Want To Join A Cult


Which Cult is right for you?

Take this Cult Placement Quiz and find out!

HINT: A Leader needs to be willing to put in a long day.
The King's Logic Puzzle

 

KingsPuzzle2
The king has proposed a contest of intellect.
 
You have a balance scale and twelve identical looking spheres of gold - except that one is either heavier or lighter than all the rest. Using the scale and only 3 measurements, you must determine which is the 'odd ball' and whether it is lighter or heavier.
 
If you fail, you get to be court jester for a month. The king has a terrible sense of humor - trust me; you don't want to be court jester (even for just a month). It's part of the reason he holds this contest. It's the only way he can get anyone to 'sign-up' for the job.
 
If you can correctly guess the 'odd ball,' but not whether it's lighter or heavier than all the others, you get to go free.
 
But if you can get the right ball AND figure out whether it's lighter or heavier - you get to keep all twelve spheres of gold. They're worth a small fortune - enough to buy your own keep - which would raise you up from lowly Surf to rich Landowner in the blink of an eye.
 
What do you have to lose - except your dignity...

 

A Penguin's Fairy Tale
unpublished

You are 'Penguin,' a small stuffed toy owned by a little girl named Sarah. You love Sarah very much and Sarah loves you. You know this, because Sarah says so quite often. You are Sarah's favorite toy.

 

Bane Treasure Of The Vampire King
unpublished

What do I know of cultured ways, the gilt, the craft and the lie? I, who was born in a naked land and bred in the open sky. The subtle tongue, the sophist guile, they fail when the broadswords sing; Rush in and die, dogs—I was a man before I was a king.

Epic pirate adventure in the world of Conan the Barbarian. Sail the savage seas in search of a legendary treasure cursed by the gods!

Dungeon Stompage II
unpublished

Sixty nine years after Raven's grand adventure, Tempest, the half-human child of the Succubus Lilianthea, takes up the quest to find the lost treasure hoard of the Great Dragon Serpentfang - wherein lies an artifact with the power to destroy the Oblitterum Nomeno once and for all.

Battle even more fearsome monsters and your own half-demonic nature, to recover the artifact in time; before the book of damned souls draws you in past the point of no return!

Five Pin Code
unpublished

The following is a 'How To It Guide,' for building a Five Pin Pass Code into your game for the purpose of pass-coding Unlockables, Game Sequels, or the like.

Articles Written

Advanced Item Manipulation
You don't have to have Items specifically tied to pages or use $ITEMSTATEXX to pick them up and drop them.
How to Shuffle a List with Scripting
You can use Advanced Editor Scripting to randomize the order of list (without duplicates) using the following method.
How to use On-Page Variable Tricks
The following discusses the use of the On-Page Variable Code (it literally goes right on the Page in the Story Editor, as opposed to Scripting, which goes into the Scripting Boxes).

Recent Posts

Sentinel's ULTIMATE ANIMAL ABUSE COMPENDIUM on 3/23/2023 1:37:50 PM
Fun fun!
A brief introduction on 3/23/2023 1:30:22 PM
Welcome to the site~ I find EndMaster's parting comments on these contests to be some of the more interesting highlights here on the site.
CoG staff pissing their pants AGAIN on 3/17/2023 6:14:26 PM
Too true.
CYS Media Archive on 3/13/2023 8:18:11 PM
Hadn't seen these ones. The last time I was looking at these types of videos, that group that draws as they play tried Kill Aman's Mustache and never even figured out how to start the game lol!
Free publicity (and infamy!) on 3/7/2023 7:51:46 PM
Tsk, not even a word about (2 Minutes Hate: Now with omnidirectional vitriol!) - F
CYS Prophet has spoken on 12/11/2022 9:11:44 AM

Muzak~MP3

Hatter's Sketchbook II on 11/5/2022 6:09:12 PM
Love the shark costume! These are such a treat ^v^
Cat Neuters Pedant! on 9/22/2022 3:46:50 PM
CYS scripting is like programing in machine language. Check out https://chooseyourstory.com/help/articles/article.aspx?ArticleId=4293 for example. (Yeah, too lazy right now to be bothered with Clickable Linkies)
Centering an image? on 8/21/2022 5:50:11 PM
The above code has Unicode characters in it, so it won't work with copy/paste. You will need to type it out yourself by hand or change the greater and less than signs back manually if you paste it in. Also, I didn't really bug-check the code, just put it up there to show the proper order to use with $PAGETEXT...
Centering an image? on 8/21/2022 5:35:24 PM
^Basically, you got the order backwards.