hetero_malk, The Capybaliph
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Hey, I'm Malk. I've been around for a while. Like, more than a decade. I'm into ancient and medieval history, especially the social and religious kind. Here are some quotes about me:
"In normal times a mad man like Malk would have been hanged for his crimes. However in this time of darkness mad men can reach positions of great power" - EndMaster
"Malk probably wrote this whole fucking story while his pasty unhealthy ass was shitting on the fucking toilet. He should be the poster child that the Ugandan preachers point to when they’re preaching to their population of 'Do not eat the poo poo.'
I’m fucking serious, that’s like ALL he fucking talks about at the secret villain lair. That he’s going to shit, how he’s going to shit, what it felt like to shit and when he’s going to be shitting next.
Fuck bran muffins, this guy is eating raw fucking twine if he’s shitting this much." - EndMaster
"Wtf is this gay shit" - Fuck u
Joined: 7/18/2014
A list of my achievements:
Achievement Unlocked: Questionable Parentage (10)
Achievement Unlocked: Not Mine (-10)
Achievement Unlocked: Uganda’s Most Wanted (60)
Achievement Unlocked: Begging For The Abyss (-300)
Achievement Unlocked: Lord of the Edge (200)
Achievement Unlocked: 1st Black Crusade (200)
I am also a site admin for some baffling reason. Do let me know if you see spam or bot activity that needs to be nuked.
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Storygames
Entry into EndMaster's 2024 Prompt Contest!
The Faceless Knights uphold divine law, crushing mutation and degeneracy whenever they encounter it. When the young lord of a recently-conquered territory calls for a true servant of God, you must answer.
This game has a sequel.
A short, silly, high-octane ride through a cyberpunk future where your bullets are few, your friends are fewer, and the long tentacles of the law are slithering up your pant legs.
I am aware that technically, writing a sentence in all capital letters is gramatically incorrect. I did this on purpose, several times, for stylistic effect. If you point this out in the reviews, a team of hit-apes will kick in your door.
Winner of EndMaster's 2024 Crisis Contest!
This is a sequel to A Prayer for Destruction. It is highly recommended that you read that work before beginning this one.
The North, that frozen-over land of fanatics and heathens, has suffered a great and mysterious calamity. The Sultan bids you raise your banners and ride in his name to investigate.
Winner of EndMaster's 2020-2021 Grimdark Contest!
Take the role of Lord Winter, an aspiring sorcerer and the scion of a noble line that has fallen into obscurity.
Contains scenes of intense gore, brutality, and sexual violence.
Cover art by the talented MadHattersDaughter.
"Death is struck and nature quaking;
All creation is awaking,
To its Judge an answer making.
Lo, the book, exactly worded,
Wherein all hath been recorded;
Thence shall judgment be awarded.
When the Judge His seat attaineth,
And each hidden deed arraigneth,
Nothing unavenged remaineth."
-- Dies Irae
Ultimately, the fate of life is to destroy itself.
Note: This was adapted with express permission from a friend's "Creative Nonfiction" project for ENG223: Journalism in the 21st Century at Toronto Metropolitan University. Footnotes added by me to add clarity when needed.
this is so fucking stupid
Recent Posts
The Iliad Book Club, Book 8 on 4/21/2025 1:09:55 AMHello friends,
This time, we’re treated to some nice ultraviolence and a reversal of fortunes. Now, the Greeks are on the backfoot, fighting against their own walls. The Trojans, on the other hand, are enjoying some freedom and mobility; the dynamics of the siege have been reversed. The book ends with the Greeks seemingly about to be butchered and their ships set aflame. Fortunately, we have quite a bit left to get through, so that won’t happen.
Despite Diomedes’ chastising him, Odysseus flees the battle.Think back to his exchange with Agamemnon in Book 4 – what judgements can you make about Odysseus’ character?
Zeus interferes directly despite prohibiting the Olympians to interfere. What other characters share this unenviable trait of hypocrisy?
Poseidon is flatly unwilling to defy thundering Zeus, but his wife Hera is willing to give Agamemnon a helpful urge that ends up saving the Greeks – despite the fact that both her and Athena are forced to relent from their plans to intervene more directly. What does that say about the Olympians? Does Zeus keep his house in order?
Zeus, essentially, outlines the rest of the plot. What purpose in the narrative might that serve?
Get wrecked Malk on 4/13/2025 9:34:32 PM
Honestly I'm just glad this one isn't Ryder
The Iliad Book Club, Thread 2, Book 7 on 4/8/2025 12:03:51 AM
Hello friends,
Sorry for my lateness. It's been busy. Real fuckin busy. However, I don't want to deprive the people of their book club. One of the things I noticed on this read-through of Book 7 is that the gods come across as very opportunistic and are described pretty unflatteringly. The goddesses friendly to the Greeks have the annihilation of Troy as a "beloved goal" (p.156), and Apollo and Athena "perch like vultures" (156) to watch the unfolding duel. In fact, I think their comparison to carrion-birds is pretty interesting, as the (dis)respectful handling of human remains is a reoccurring motif throughout the poem.
We see another point of differentiation between Agamemnon and Menelaus, the latter of whom is convinced not to throw his life away in a suicidal duel against Hector while the former is always willing to beef with Trojans.
Some questions:
What do you think of Hector's decision to pause the duel?
While the Trojans feast, "clever Zeus was plotting pain for them" (173)? What do you expect to happen in the next few chapters?
What does a respect for the dead mean for these people?
What do you think of this article, concerning the occurrence of gift-exchange?
HOOKER, J. T. “GIFTS IN HOMER.” Bulletin of the Institute of Classical Studies, no. 36 (1989): 79–90. http://www.jstor.org/stable/43693892.
The Iliad Book Club, Thread 2 on 3/31/2025 11:34:34 AM
Diomedes and it's not close
Do men hate reading? on 3/26/2025 4:36:34 PM
Your friends and brother are retarded lol
TSR Comics: Comics with a free game inside! on 3/24/2025 12:37:36 PM
TSR having a double meaning will always make me smile
The Iliad Book Club, Thread 2, Book 6 on 3/23/2025 11:59:05 PM
Hello friends,
These past two weeks, we have encountered some of the best storytelling that world literature has to offer. In particular, we get a really fascinating example of an idealized version of the ritual and formal relationship between host and guest, which was of paramount importance in the ancient Greek world. Additionally, we get some really fantastic characterization of Hector and his family. The whole chapter has a really gloomy, kind of fatalistic vibe to it. Great stuff. Thanks Homer.
Here's our questions. As always, answer some none or all.
On page 135-136, there is an interesting exchange between the two royal brothers on what to do with a defeated Trojan soldier. What do their attitudes signify? Why might one of them be more in favour of massacring the defenceless than the others?
Diomedes, who last book wounded two Olympians, insists on page 138 that he has no quarrel with the deathless gods, just in case the warrior he is encountering on the field is secretly a god. What does that tell us about that most important of heroic virtues, prudence?
In Glaucus’ lengthy spiel, we see how the great deeds of the generations gone by seem more impressive than the heroes of today, through the discussion of Bellerophon. Do you think that is the case? Are many heroes of the Iliad less impressive than their pedigree?
From page 150-151, Hector gives voice to the sense of doom and futility that pervades all of the verses that discuss life inside the walls of Troy. What does it mean that Hector expects his wife to be raped and enslaved, and his home destroyed?
During the scene with Hector and Andromache, Hector is forced to remove his helmet, as it frightens the infant Scamandrius. He then expresses his desire for his son to kill an enemy and bring his bloodsoaked armour back to the city. Is this a proper wish for one’s infant son, or is Hector’s deep investment in the heroic ideal of brutal plundering and war meant to read as tragic?
Congratulations everyone who has been keeping up, you're officially 25% of the way through! Nice.
Do men hate reading? on 3/22/2025 2:44:57 PM
The median book published now is booktok / romantasy gooner slop, which might literally be worse than not reading.
In any case, most men consume short form video content that's designed to turn you into schizo Hitler for fifteen hours a day. Not much room in there for reading.
The Iliad Book Club, Book 5 on 3/20/2025 10:41:33 AM
Wow. I didn't know that. I just - you're telling me that now for the first time.
The Iliad Book Club, Book 5 on 3/12/2025 11:13:16 PM
I think Ares is "human" insofar as he has an appetite for blood; Neal makes the case that appetites for food and drink are generally not predicated of the gods in the Iliad, which seems to mark him as slightly more anthropomorphic.