, #60 for
played 947 times (finished 131)
"trek through the forest"
"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"
"must be at least this tall to play"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 10. If this were a movie, it would probably be between G and PG.
A jornada de um jovem enquanto decobre seu lugar no mundo.
I can't really comment on the grammar because I don't speak Portuguese (all I could recognise is corre and that's because it's the same as Spanish) and the translation I used probably caused a lot of grammatical errors, but based on where you put capital letters and accents it looks like you put at least some effort into spelling and grammar.
I really enjoyed the multitude of endings! Some authors focus so much on the storyline they want you to see that they don't bother writing any others, resulting in a linear storygame. You didn't do this. Well done.
With that said, I didn't really connect to the main character at all or feel involved in the story. This may have been because the storygame was so short, and each page covered so much action. At one point, you shortened what should have been the climax of the storygame (the protagonist fighting the werewolves) into a three line paragraph on the ending page. As the reader I felt like my choices weren't really influencing much because of this.
Nonetheless, I love that we're getting foreign language storygames on CYS now! Can't wait to read this with a better understanding of Portuguese in the future.
on 2/26/2013 12:22:53 PM with a score of 0
I felt seriously disconnected from the protagonist because I knew nothing about him. I needed more backstory and history to be able to appreciate the story, otherwise it's meaningless to me. I can't comment on the mechanics of the prose because I don't know if the errors were caused by Google Translate or your writing or both.
on 11/15/2012 4:51:47 PM with a score of 0
People are ravenous for points, so they are rating this even if they have no idea what's going on. I'm sorry about that. People requesting that the author translate the story into English are being unreasonable. People who speak and read other languages should get to have CYS stories too, and English speakers shouldn't be dunking on them.
on 10/1/2018 10:24:35 AM with a score of 0
I speak some Spanish, and I think I was able to decipher some of this despite not speaking Portuguese (based on the ending I got, it seems kind of like a hippy story; save mother nature and all that. I was nominated by a goddess of somesort as what amounts to a woods sprite to forever protect the forest or whatever). Also I was surprised that laughter was hahaha and not jajaja. From what I understood, it seems kind of like you're dealing with fawn or fairy like spirits of some sort, so the mythology (from what best I could understand) was somewhat interesting.
on 9/24/2018 8:21:42 PM with a score of 0
Why you no English?
on 3/17/2018 1:28:15 AM with a score of 0
Umm... Google Translate was awesome but not you. Use English.
-- English on 2/19/2017 7:55:36 PM with a score of 0
I got my tablet to translate it into English.
on 7/30/2016 2:15:04 AM with a score of 0
on 4/12/2015 8:01:15 AM with a score of 0
on 2/16/2015 1:05:16 PM with a score of 0
Bom, um ou outro erro gramatical e bem curto, mas gostei bastante da maneira como é escrito. Tente criar histórias maiores e mais profundas.
on 8/23/2014 3:05:50 PM with a score of 0
Show All Comments
Help & Info
Who Is Online
64 guests and
version 20200003 | ChooseYourStory © 2001 - 2020, Halogen Studios Entertainment |