Player Comments on What I want to Be!

While it's interesting to write a choose-your-own poem, this one doesn't make any sense. The poem is made of couplets that sort of rhyme sometimes, without any real connection to the choices that were made. There's no narrative here. If you choose liking "soda" the poem does not then go on to be about soda. It just rhymes (sort of) something with soda and staggers on.

Rhyme-wise, this poem rhymes "Wolf and golf" and "howdah and soda" which just doesn't work. It uses "defiantly" for "definitely" and quite a few other serious typos.

Branching poems are a very cool idea, but this one doesn't get the job done.

Thank you for the warning on the shortness of the story. Of course, with it being a poem, people might expect it to be quite a bit shorter than a story. And the play length clearly shows as a 1/8, so it is going to be really short.

It was a little interesting, but just a little bit, and not because of it being short. There were a couple of typos, but the rhyming scheme seemed to work. Unfortunately, while the different choices seemed to be nice, they didn’t really seem to really make any difference. It looked like each choice gave you exactly one line of semi-rhyming text, but the rest of the page was exactly the same. It would have been nice if the choice of animal, for example, led to a page about that animal in all the text on the page, not just one line. Then the choices would make sense. As it is written, I don’t really understand why you even have choices.

So sure, it’s a nice little poem, but with a little more work I think it could be expanded nicely and it would be so much nicer if each selection led to an entire page about that selection.

I haven't seen anything like this before on the site so you earn some points there. Unfortunately this hardly felt poetic, some of the lines appear to have been added only to make a rhyme and actually add no merit to the verse. I had hoped that when we chose an animal, for example, we would be brought through a nice page about being a frog. Then we would be able to choose what we do as a frog. Instead we get a series of choices as to what we are with no real consequences for choosing them. I want to be told what it would mean to be a green caramel frog. Length is a great thing to have, but I do not want it in this story if it just means more haphazardly connected pages. I want a poem about being a frog dadgummit. I don't want to tell you that I am a frog and then read some nonsensically strung together lines and suddenly be candy.

... Wolves don't play golf.

poetry is more than rhyming, you [should] know; god, I hate society

I didn't find this at all interesting. No narrative, and not proofread. Some of the lines didn't make any sense in context.

Boring. Sorry, but that’s the truth.

Unique, and kept my interest for the short time that I played it. But I don't really see a point, besides just choosing random options of what you want to be, and the riddles very obvious. 4/8 though, 'cause it was short and entertaining.

I'm not sure what message this was trying to convey. First I'm a wolf, then I'm a lollipop, then I'm some tea.

Also, "defiantly" isn't used in that way. "Definitely" is the word you're looking for.

Nice poem.??

I liked it, it is amusing. Good job.

I don't think "shedded" is a word. :p

Wow, short, but fun.

It's not really a CYOA. As far as I can tell, the choices make no difference.

ironically I liked it

I really enjoyed that.

Haha.. I actually enjoyed this!

This was actually ok. It was quite good. An interesting concept but. . . Once again -can't stop myself- it is just too short. Make it longer please. Add about ten or more pages with creative poems and I promise to rate it a four of a five.

Give it more effort that's all.

Actually not bad, everyone says poems and stories for children are really easy to write but they're actually quite challenging. This is a pretty good one though it's not really a CYOS :)

well it is not a story.

Meh. Was this a real storygame? Kind of. But I'm not angry. The poem thing is pretty creative!

I really don't understand...
I'd also like to say something else: spend more than a few hours on each story. Notice how the best storygames could take a few months complete.