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Before the fall of the Earth Republic we were a peaceful people never to be pushed to the brink of war over petty squabbles we were determined to see our race flourish into the future to further our knowledge into the vast unknowns of this great Universe through technological advancements and science. Until the day came where the MCSN began to take a foothold in our local political parties at first they were laughed at mocked for their radical ideas of the past "Reform and Renew" was there Battlecry. None us really knew what that really meant or at what cost to our thriving civilization we were a peaceful people.... 

The MCSN or the Martian Collective of Sovereign Nations..

"Captain Kortal the men are ready." The massive tree of a man stood in the doorway of the very dimly lit bridge command room of the appropriately named MSV-Ares the vessel was the command flagship of the greater MCSN fleet a massive armada of destroyer class dreadnoughts currently stationed in orbit just beyond the trajectory of Luna the Earth Republics only moon. "Excellent prepare the fleet for offensive maneuvers we shall be passing through Earths automated defense grid once we are on the far side of Luna" Captain Kortal motioned towards the rather large man. 

(Should have put this in the Brainstorming section but so far what does anyone think would anyone like to hear more?)

I feel some of these sentences are a bit long. Try reading it aloud and tell me if you run out of breath.

Other than that, I don't really have any complaints, but nothing has really happened yet. There is room for interesting developments based on what has been mentioned, but until more is written I can't say if it'll be any good. Sci-Fi can be pretty great, and there is a lot of space to explore interesting ideas.

Mars vs Earth isn't exactly something revolutionary, but it hardly needs to be, and I don't think criticizing the idea is worthwhile atm, as a lot of things could be explained and expanded upon to make it more interesting as the story continues. I suppose someone could pick apart what is here, but as I feel it wouldn't be the easiest thing to do well, I'll leave that to someone else.

One general piece of advice is to keep the scope of what you're writing in mind, since massive-scale sci-fi conflicts can get out of hand a bit more easily than some other story concepts (but honestly, they can all get out of hand, aha).

However, to answer your question, sure, I'd like to hear more.

Thank you so much for your input seriously I would love to tweak it a bit or even possibly change around some over used details it wouldn't be as much about Mars vs earth but instead I would like it eventually to be a choose your own story game where you could choose between 3 main characters focusing on entirely different stories on different planets altogether that could cross over somewhat but wouldn't be the main focus of the story maybe add some deeper space exploration choices that avoids war between earth altogether or draining earth of its resources to explore further so still add war options in either direction or possibly just a story of modern earth altogether I dont want to over use concepts though so again I would love further input and I will work on my long winded sentences thanks again.

It isn't really long-winded so much as not using any punctuation.  I would start with commas.  Check out the articles on this site to get you started.

This is a good one to start with:  https://chooseyourstory.com/help/articles/article.aspx?ArticleId=4315

Thank you I have always been bad with punctuation unfortunately I was hoping this site and community would be able to help with that and grammatical errors 

Thank you, I have unfortunately always been bad with punctuation. I was hoping this site and community would be able to help with the grammatical errors.