Non-threaded

Forums » Writing Workshop » Read Thread

Find proofreaders here, useful resources, and share opinions and advice on story crafting.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Welcome to the compendium of wizardry! Here four authors will discuss and build ideas to help create our collaboration. You can see the going ons and see updates if you would like, or turn back now and spare you virgin eyes. A peom will be placed here to help you. 

Prayer Troth couldn't stop thinking about the star
It was just so powerful and old
Never had he known anything so bizarre

That morning, Prayer Troth was shocked by the guitar
He found himself feeling rather bold
Prayer Troth couldn't stop thinking about the star

Later, Prayer Troth was spooked by a car
He tried to focus on a mould
Never had he known anything so bizarre

Ranees Yowl tried to distract him with a tar
Said his mind had become too twofold
Prayer Troth couldn't stop thinking about the star

Prayer Troth took action like an avatar
The star was becoming too stronghold
Never had he known anything so bizarre

Prayer Troth nosedived like an old are
His mind turned into a threshold
Prayer Troth couldn't stop thinking about the star
Never had he known anything so bizarre

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
lol fag

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

You virgin :)

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I have failed to protect me virgin eyes.

Oh, the humanity!

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Worst poem ever

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

That poem... Was... Strange. frown

Anyway, first topic on the agenda! The name! Now, before we discuss name options, why did you decide to go with Wizards and Ogres in the first place? Where do the ogres come into it? Are they a big part of the story? ^_^

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
Very big. Just ask his mother.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
I'm right here

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
You'd probably be biased

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
Yes, and?

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
It's fine, Ogre. Go scratch your butt.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
Waaaay ahead of you...

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

How about the name is Draíocht? Or that's the name of the school or town the child is born? It's Irish for magic and I think it looks and sounds pretty cool.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I don't know, it's a cool name, but it doesn't really convey to the players what the game is about. With "Wizards and ogres" the player knows that the game is going to have wizards and ogres in it, but doesn't really explain to the reader that they're going to be a wizard... So I was thinking maybe a title that conveys that you're going to be studying magic yourself... Something like "Student of Magic" or "The Enchanter's Apprentice" or something like that... Obviously the choice is ultimately up to you, just figured we could all throw some suggestions about. ^_^

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Also... @Anastasia @Mathias ^_^

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

That was just a title I threw together to get the game started, the plan was to get a group decision on a solid name.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

What's the story about? All you've given us is a strange poem and a generic title.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

The story is about a young wizard or witch going to a wizarding school where they will be able to take any class of magic the school has to offer and each class has different paths and challenges along the way. On the train ride there you also have the choice of sitting with a wizard or a witch who "just so happens" to take the same class as you and when you graduate, they will accompany you on a journey to:

a) find a lost and powerful artifact for the school

b) stalk then catch a thunder of dragons

c) enter a  dual wizard tournament your father entered but lost early

Or you can do the whole story solo

These are all the plans I had for the story and every single one is open to change, this is just the roughest of drafts.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

What exactly is a "thunder of dragons"?

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

It's a group of them. It's called a thunder because that's what the sound of all their wings beating the air combined would supposedly sound like. It's like a murder of crows. Or a gaggle of geese.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

This story sounds similar to Harry Potter.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

It's supposed to be, it's close enough for anyone who wanted to have a Harry Potter like adventure without it being too close to the real thing. Does anyone think it's too similar?

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Oh look a question, I can ramble a bit now!

No, just because you have a wizard school doesn't automatically mean you are writing Harry Potter. I'd say that your idea is still too vague to be called out as highly similar beyond superficial things, as the actual execution and writing style (along with plot focus and progression) will be what truly determines how similar it is to Harry Potter (if you ask me). Tone could also probably go in that list, but so could other things I imagine.

Granted, having a train ride to the wizard school is another superficial similarity, and one I question the intent behind, but it isn't inherently wrong or something that should be different. Do keep in mind that if your story does become a Harry Potter fan-fiction, I'd advise labeling it appropriately and being careful with canon character cameos.

Anyway, here are some questions:

  • There is magic, but what is the setting? Modern adventure with a 'secret' magic world? Full blown fantasy? Weird sci-fi 'magic' post apocalypse facility?
  • Is the protagonist a chosen one? Are they an orphan with an abusive home life?
  • How dark does the story get? What maturity rating would it have / is it targeting the same audience as Harry Potter?
  • How does the magic system work? Is it a soft or hard one, are there schools of magic or is it all just one broad thing? Is it super undefined or very rigorous?
  • Are people split into four groups within the school based on personality dispositions?

I'll leave you with that, but keep in mind that you don't necessarily need to answer these questions, they may not matter at this stage or be irrelevant given your writing process, but as I understand it this is a coauthor story, so I will encourage communication between all the writers to ensure you have some sort of consistency between your parts, but more importantly, that you all agree with the direction the story writing process (and actual story) is heading in.

Thus, it should go without saying, if an author thinks it is too similar (and that this is bad) then you should probably look to differentiate your story more.

TL;DR
I'd say no, but there are other people who's opinions you should care about more in regards to this question. Anyway, best of luck with the story, coauthoring can be a challenge.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I was thinking the more modern route but, again, in Harry Potter, not much use of phones, because you could have a simple spell to contact anyone you need to. ex.

I would think not, if s/he were, then it would start to be a little close to HP by my standards, but s/he could be! That for us as a group to decide. And if they are, would it make the journeys more difficult or easier? (Probably harder because that's usually how that works)

Maturity based on site standards might be around 5, maybe even a 4 or 3 with what's being written as of now. Again, if anyone would like to see it different, voice your opinion. 

Definitely not. It's like collage, you choose the class you want to take and you excel, period, unless you make a choice that ends the game of course.

Thank you for these questions, it opened up some ideas I haven't thought. If anyone has any questions at all about the story don't be afraid to ask. And if any of my co-authors disagree or want to change anything of what I said, fell free to say, this is just a story that is in my head and you guys have said yes to help shape it, you have every right to the major and minor details as any other person who is helping write.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

In regard to the game being too similar to Harry Potter, I think maybe you could help differentiate the two if, instead of being set in the modern world, the game was set in more of a high fantasy world. Something a bit more like Middle Earth, with a more Middle-Ages feel and assorted fantasy races... Just a suggestion though. ^_^

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I am liking how path C sounds, it's like something out of some western revenge film but with magic which is, of course, always a plus.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I hope that they all turn out to be fun paths but it too is my favorite out of the three.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Sorry, wasn't really explained. This thread wasn't created so much to draw people's attention, but more as a group chat for all the co-authors involved, to discuss ideas for the game... Which is why there's not really any explanation. cheeky

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Pfft, show me this coauthor discussion then! Take back the thread! There was a little bit of talk regarding the title and some other stuff, but so far two coauthors haven't even showed up!

Will each coauthor be writing their own path? I think that is an interesting style to adopt for coauthoring, but it can obviously go badly, and so far this thing is looking rather uncollaborative, (tho granted, it may be a bit too early to judge).

Anyway, I feel my opining is getting a little aggressive so I'll stop there and just wish the best of luck to the four writers with this, for it will be interesting to see how this develops.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Lol! And you know that micro-agressive opining is a form of violence! ^_^

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
So we've got one actual author and three so far utterly useless unknowns. Hmm, I wonder who will wind up doing the bulk of the work on this.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Hey, he's new... At least give him a chance to sit on his ass and do nothing first. cheeky

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
Yes to be fair he's been providing a lot of entertainment on the forum, I suppose that's more than the other two you're working with have bothered to do. And it's at the point where getting distracted away from the forum with a writing project for awhile would probably be the best thing for him and something I'd advise.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
"sit on his ass and do nothing"

Hey, did someone call me?

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Ah, I want to see how this pans out. 

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I am not utterly useless. I've acctually been making pages and adding to the story. But Avery has been to a shit ton of writting.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

What about the other two? 

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I can't speak for them buuuut.........

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

... Actually, I haven't done any writing at all. Not sure who's done the writing you have so far, but it wasn't me. I'm just here to help with coding and shit. cheeky

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
This is really weird.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Lol. I really have no idea what's going on. cheeky

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I haven't touched it at all either. I told Castor when he asked for my help that I probably wasn't going to write too much in the story itself as I want to focus more on my projects.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

Anastasia? frown

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
Reading her profile, maybe someone should explain to the mysterious Anastasia how to post from her phone and answer these questions.

Although since the only time she ever used the forum it was to say 'Hi im new too so ur not the only one.' ...maybe the status quo is best for everybody.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago
A bit of pointing out the obvious here, but Castor has willingly put himself in a position where there's a good chance he'll be forced to make a new account soon.

I can only assume he's made appropriate plans with his co authors for saving/transferring their work over to a fresh copy since the alternative would be pretty irresponsible and dickish!

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

From what I understand, the game is still in the "let's talk about stuff and decide what the hell we're going to do with this game first" stages, so I don't think there's actually anything that need to be copy/pasted.

Wizards and Ogres!!

4 years ago

I think you need to change your name. You're not very good at poems.