You're A Lizard, Harry!

A gripping new Harry Potter game!!!!!!

In this fascinating tale Harry Potter embarks on a new adventure. A gripping tale unfolds that no die-hard Potter fan should miss. In particular if you want to write your own harry potter adventure, read this one first!

The above is what I might write if this was a serious game, unfortunately it is not. This is one of the many joke games on the site, that is meant to foo..aehm, educate the of dimw...interested readers that come here for such material. I am pretty sure none of the target audience will read past the first paragraph of this review, so I guess now that we are among ourselves, I can write openly without spoiling the joke.

First of all whatever this game set out to achieve it is obviously working. I had to cry a little (and might have lost my faith in humanity) when I saw how often this game is getting played. But what else can I even write about a game that does not try to be good. So, please take this review with a pinch of salt (from my tears).

The humor in this game certainly works, and it starts even before you open the actual game. You can't help but smile at the title (which might explain why Harry lives under the stairs and can communicate with snakes---god, I wish the game would actually be about this). The description with its many typos, it's demand for "conzstructiv feedbac" and the warning(?) that this part 1 of 90,000 is perhps a little bit on the nose. However, I could not help but laugh at the tag "based on a true story" and some of the comments are hillarious.

The game has no new story, but is just a retelling of the first Harry Potter novel, so far, so intentially bad.

Humor is normally not my thing and I was bracing myself for the worst, but the first pages of the story are actually very well written, nicely bringing out the characters, complete with overblown accents. Expertly done Liminal, you know how to write well (or you failed miserably at writing badly, who knows).

The game still succeeds in doing some things badly. After the first scene the author pretends to (or perhaps does) run out of patientience and then the rest is just a jumble of some short rushed lines that tell a highly-condensed version of the rest of the story, while the author even forgets how to capitalize words. Thankfully, the rushed narration makes the game so short that it ends before it becomes annoying.

So in summary, this game manages to be a funny, fitting, and in parts even well-written, caricarture of bad games. It has succeeded in attracting a large audience on whom the educational value of demonstrating common errors, will sadly be lost ( see comments).

Congratulations to Liminal for making such a successful game. (Now please make a serious one!)

This is a really funny satire of the noob's first shitty fanfic before they get inevitably smited (smote? smitten? for fuck's sake i don't care i'm tired). Harry Potter is an especially good choice for this as that franchise tends to aggregate some of the shittiest entries in the realm of fanfiction written by elementary schoolers.

I think the full commitment to the bit does hinder it even in a satire though. A lack of real choice in a CYOA game, as well as an abominably tiny and rushed game altogether, are in fact core elements of a shitty CYS story, but I feel like the fact that this *is* satire is literally the only thing keeping it from getting forcibly unpublished and tucked into a closet with a black hole in it. There are literally endless possibilities for mocking bad fanfiction, and I would've loved to see some of these here. Unfortunately it just isn't there.

Yeah, this is a funny five-minute read regardless. The author definitely accomplished what they set out to do, but take it for what it is.

It is still so, so much better than anything legitimate that JK Rowling has ever released though.

Truly the BOOBS!!! of the new generation.

Liminal, this is brilliant :D You have nailed the cliches of a certain (very) special kind of writer and this story is a brilliant example of a particular way of writing (there will be some cretins out there who can’t recognize true beauty when they see it and will criticize you. Verbally incinerate them). You portray a certain kind of UK accent very well. Obviously, there are a lot of words and some of them are spelt correctly or put in the right order, a lack of originality which I found frankly disappointing at times, but I think I can ignore that to focus on the true beauty of what you have created.

In some ways I feel this is a significant improvement on the original as it is more suitable for millennials and much more original in both dialogue and prose. I think it was an error on the part of the author that Dudley survived the snake but I like the single use of the word “space”. I think the lack of choices in a cys is a brilliant narrative choice and I liked Drigah (this part seems like something Sent would write as well!). I also like the fact that this story doesn’t use capitals but spells onomatopoeia correctly.

Obviously, a piece of art like this is above criticism (some might also say beyond praise as well) but I humbly beg the writer’s pardon to point out the one single, obvious, irredeemable flaw in this: it’s not longer. I feel it’s possible we might have skipped a few bits in the story here and there and would very much like to see a full, more fleshed-out version of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (or possibly, the entire series or even other classical works like The Lord of the Things, er Rings) given this author’s fantastic writing style and treatment. What of Fluffy, the tree-headed God? Snape, the Photos Master? Or even Dumbledoor, the principle and headmonster of Hogwarts? There is so much potential here, so much raw… something. Great work :D

This should have been the original plot

This should have been the original plot

I honestly think this game could be better. also, to that guy who said he liked it in all caps, lol fag

LOVE IT YOUR A LIZARD HARRY IM A LIZARD

I can't believe that you were able to make 2 questions with more than one selection, way to go with not making those 2 questions boring and unimaginative by just clicking it and having no choice and making it seem like a go along with the story. That would be bad, but those two questions had choice!!!!!!! And at least the story wasn't one word because that would be so short. I love how there is no possible way to lose and if you don't want to lose you go here. OH, I just remembered, you said no bad commentS but that means I can give one bad comment because it is not comments: Accept feedback, it is the way to improve. And nice job, this is really hard to do, and you wrote a lot.

Good, but too childish