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Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Okay, let's just make it official: the winner is @Pugpup1 with Father Leofwine is Dead. Even though the rest of you are failures, this contest blew me away with how good the entries were. Especially with the overlap with Succubus Contest I wasn't really sure at all what to expect here. You've all massively exceeded my expectations, and I don't just say that because my expectations for you all are typically very, very low. I must sleep now because of my hilariously early wake up times, but I'll be back after work tomorrow with the ratings calculated for everyone, some extra commentary from Bill, and I solemnly vow to finish reviewing all the games by, uh...Monday. I just didn't want the results to be held up just by me. Anyway, you guys (except for Serpent, to his eternal SHAME) all did an amazing job and should be proud of yourselves. Huge thanks as well to @Gower, @TurnipBandit and @Bill_Ingersoll for being willing to judge. I don't know how but you guys did that fast, and this also means all the stories are accumulating some great feature worthy comments right out of the gate. (I'll go in and hand those out tomorrow too.)

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

It was a pleasure to assist in the judging. Congratulations to Pugpup for winning the contest and congratulations to everyone who managed to avoid getting shamed.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

>tfw no second or third place or even honorable mentions

https://data.whicdn.com/images/325778968/large.jpg

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
You expected me to do simple math at 10pm?

I'd have had to make more links if I did that, too. Stop bullying me.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

I thought the three best stories got the authors 125 points. I don't remember anything about a trophy.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

I believe there is a trophy just for winning any contest.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

So long as it was above a certain competitive bar. I haven’t read these entrants but it sounds like this one will qualify.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

Did not mention a trophy, though Pugpup will win one (again) for being in first place, yes.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Winner got 125, losers get nothing.

And my brother is in the hospital so I went to hang out there after work, and the Caring & Sharing Hour with Chris in the Discord kept me distracted AT work and so I haven't had time to do anything with this thread today. Tomorrow I guess buuuut I really want to see Once Upon A Time in Hollywood so assuming my brother doesn't suddenly get worse there is a real possibility I'll do that instead.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

Contest trophy worthy? Should I edit the description of his trophy?

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
I'd just ask which one he wants to keep, unless there's room to mention both. I imagine he will continue winning contests for a bit though, he was a close second in the last one too.


Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

Yep — we can mention both.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

I had lots of fun reading all of the stories!

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Congrats!

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

Thanks to everyone for the kind words and well done to everyone who entered! I’m excited to read all the stories

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Congrats to pugpup and to all who completed stories for this contest!

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Congrats pug! Your story is well-deserving of 1st place.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

CONGRATURATION

YOUR WINNER

GO AND REST OUR HERO

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago

Good job pugpup. I still havn't finished your story yet. Partly because I keep forgetting there's a save feature for story games, but what I have read has been great.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
Commended by JJJ-thebanisher on 8/26/2019 8:13:35 AM

These were my rankings and comments on each of the Lone Hero stories:

1 - Father Leofwine is Dead. An outstanding story and an engrossing read, with vivid characters and an interesting setting. The character of Wulf, who comes from nowhere and has a background he keeps to himself, fits the "lone hero" theme perfectly. The branching style is mostly Gauntlet in nature, which seems to fit the intricate plot well; rather than leading into different possibilities, the advance-or-die decisions keep the reader (literally) guessing. Perhaps some of the decisions could have been set up better, but overall this was an excellent story. I rated this one an 8/8.

2 - Paper-Mache. This story had an interesting premise and great use of branching. The writer's previous storygames were rated as 3s, but this one should be a solid 5-6. No one branch conveyed the entire story, and so there was little repetition. There were some minor logic issues in the way some branches flowed, and evidence of a lack of self-confidence, but the story found an interesting take on the lone hero theme (the protag is surrounded by living pinatas) and this proved to be an interesting read.

3 - Dusty Fist 2. Very funny story, great use of branching, fits the contest theme well… which is why I'm rating this one higher than Ninja's, even though overall I think Ninja's submission is a stronger storygame. The only things holding it back for me is its shortness; while DF2 will get a lot of plays, there were longer contest entries that involved far greater effort, and I have to recognize that.

4 - Twin Arrows. This will probably be my most controversial ranking. This game was very fun to read, and it was very well written and constructed. In terms of branching, there were lots of quick-death options and only two primary branches, but the tone was light and the style fit the subject matter. Each of the two main branches jumped track in terms of genre. But I'm not sure how much this fits into the "lone hero" theme. In one branch the "hero" is actually pretty hapless and self-serving, and in the other he's never really alone. So while I rated the storygame a 7, I lowered my rating in terms of the contest. Based on the other reviews, Turnip and Gower disagree with me. But to me, the "lone hero" concept just wasn't as strongly featured here as it was in the others.

5 - Dragoon's Charge. This story is potentially a hit for the readers who want a shorter storygame (one without much of a time commitment). Prior knowledge of the practical uses of various nineteenth-century weaponry is helpful. The story is very short and to the point, which makes it perhaps a thrilling diversion but not an immersive read. The protag / lone hero is mysterious by virtue of the fact that no backstory is provided, but the perils are vivid and the heroism is real. Spelling/grammar issues abound, however.

From this point forward, all of the stories are problematic.

6 - Morcant. The story was linear, front-loaded with exposition, and ended in a depressing way. Yes, there is a lone hero front and center in this story, but the primary endings involving either killing a child or condemning the child to a hellish existence.

7 - Apostle. This is an interesting start to what might someday be a good Edutainment story, but there is minimal branching and the story ends before anything happens. Also, it is unclear how the "lone hero" theme comes into play. Presumably, the protag (who sets off from home alone to meet one of the early popes) is "heroic" by risking persecution if his Christian faith is discovered, but the danger in this story is only implied, and not actually encountered. In my opinion, this story does not meet contest guidelines. Still, it is much better than what follows:

8 - Hell is Empty. Basically, this story was too short to be engaging, and the dialog turned out to be lots of misquoted lines from Shakespeare. The protag was capable of some nasty deeds herself, making her less than sympathetic, and the "lone hero" had a distracting way of speaking that made no sense to me. I was not a fan.

9 - The Hanging of Jordan Nickler. The story is unintelligible, although there is an inkling of promise. But more importantly: I could find little evidence of a lone hero theme.

10 - Transient. This was a rushed and sloppy game that at times made no sense, and no idea what genre it was supposed to be.

Lone Hero Results

2 months ago
I haven't forgotten you guys! I just woke up and I'm about to tackle the rest of the reviews.