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Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

It's a bird! It's a plane! No it's you! Here to save the day!

I'm sure we've all wondered what it would be like having super powers, or if not in general a specific type of super power.  Well, screw those!  Today we're going to be focusing on.....well, ridiculous super powers.  So if you could have one, totally ridiculous, useless, or otherwise strange super power, what would it be?

My super power would be the amazing ability to morph into a slug man cocoon and hide from any and all criminal dangers!

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

Mine would be the ability to have a million super powers

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

the ability to have a million super powers but you can't use them :0

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
Each stupider and more useless than the last.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
Mine would allow for genuine cat herding.

I'm sure it would make adminning here simpler as well.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

does it allow for stacking as well?

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
Of course, that's half the point.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
I'd like to detach and re-attach my ligaments like legos or something like that.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
How about intuitively knowing the exact shipping arrangement and kinks yourr fanfic readers most fervently want from you without them having to constantly request it first?

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
Nah, I like to see them request only to go "Yeah, no."

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

If I could thumbs up this comment, I would.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

I would want the ability to know who has a foot fetish, in order to avoid them.  

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

Do you have ugly feet?

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

I question your motives for asking.  This is one such time in which that power could have come in handy.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

I’ll take that as a yes. I’ll bet that you inherited your feet from a mole cricket. Disgusting!

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

I’d like the ability to control all hair. I could go around and give criminals bowl cuts, then they would be so embarrassed they would leave.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

Well you were mean and disgusting to my Squire so your thoughts on this thread and hereby rendered irrelevant.

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

Thanks, Sir Corgi. 

I almost bought three pairs of steel-toed boots because of him.  

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

the steel is best used on the shin of your foe

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

Indeed, sir.  However, I fear he'd enjoy it.  

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

oh shit he would, run Cricket run! To a bunker of safety and without foot lickers!

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

*scurries away*

I don't even feel safe on the Internet anymore.  

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago
three words : ingrown nails invocation

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

ew..

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

h

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

I have a friend who said she wants the superpower of telekinetically slapping people without them knowing it was her.

Me, I would love to summon tremendous amounts of alfredo. 

Epic Ridiculousness

5 months ago

An aura of brutal honesty. Check it out in action:

"Honey, don't forget we're having dinner at my mother's tonight."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, babe."

"I layed out our matching sweaters that mother made us. You know, the ones with the cats sewed on."

ninjapitka walks by

"I want a divorce."

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago
Hmm, I recall Killa said something this morning about having the IRL power to 'thrust his dick in a book and absorb its knowledge.'

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

Should have took Library and Information Science in college.

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago
Wow, just out all of my secret abilities why don't you.

THE WORLD ISN'T READY FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME!

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

Or maybe people like you aren't ready for the world

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

Damn 

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago
I could, for just a split second, give any female in sight the feeling that they have a very large penis. I just wanna see how they react especially if it's in public or on TV...like maybe doing it to Hillary Clinton while she gives a speech. Like they can totally feel it between their legs, dangling or if they're horny a tightness to their pants caused by a boner that doesn't exist. I'd imagine it to be a very surreal experience and the facial reactions would be absolute gold.

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

That is how i know, you don't have a girlfriend

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

Dave's mind would be blown

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago
Idk I think the reverse of this could be possibly even funnier.

Not as easy to monetize in the fetish community though.

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago

You wouldn't want to know even for a second what being a penis haver is like?
Lame 

Epic Ridiculousness

4 months ago
not just any penis haver, a hefty-penis haver