January 6, 2021:
The date the United States of America devolved into a banana republic.
Technically, that would be the VP's spot.
He's just mad that Furiosa renegged on their deal
See if Hillary had got voted in as President in 2016, we would have missed all this amusing chaos.
You guys have survived Trump and George W Bush, I'm sure one more retarded president won't hurt. ^_^
Well I guess now begins the reign of Warlord LARPER, First of his name.
This guy who stole the podium looks like he just won a giant Oscar. ^_^
I don't want to lock her in so she can't edit, but Briar's image isn't showing up.
Weird, will try and find a new one.
Fixed. ^_^
With Warlord LARPER in charge maybe we can at last get Leif Erickson Day as a national holiday instead of Columbus Day.
Now rise for our new national anthem.
Yeah, "This video is not available in your country" are some pretty catchy lyrics. ^_^
On Tuesday the account listed in her name tweeted: "Nothing will stop us....they can try and try and try but the storm is here and it is descending upon DC in less than 24 hours....dark to light!"
"When the looting starts, the shooting starts." - Donald J Trump. ^_^
Also heard that 3 other people died in the riot but it didn't say how. Anybody over there know?
Awh, I'd prefer to imagine that everyone caught corona-virus ^_^
Never before has such a tragic and pointless loss of life amused me so. ^_^
I don't see anything lawful in the republican party. All of this law and order stunt has been a fake. This is painfully obvious when it comes to Trump but there is a wider pattern there. Of course there are exceptions, but the general pattern is that they are happy to use the law in their favor but don't respect it. Also not saying that it doesn't happen in the democrats as well but to a different extent.
And lawful isn't even enough for a politician. Every set of rules has a loophole (Gödel's Theorem is basically the mathematical proof of that). History has shown that if we let politician subvert the spirit of the law by exploiting the loopholes democracy cannot survive. Therefore we must hold Politician to a much higher standard of integrity, following not only the letters of the law but upholding it's spirit.
*british voice* he's a bit artistic
This is what happens when you order your revolution from wish. ^_^
Look at these brainiacs, climbing a wall to defend a POTUS whose primary campaign promise was to build a border wall to keep people out of the country.
I mentioned this in the discord, but if Trump had really wanted to go all out, he should have been marching in the middle of his crazed cultist crowd screaming about taking power for the people brandishing a pistol from his long coat and telling them to storm the capitol.
If the cops were too confused to stop the mob before, they’d REALLY be stumped now. Hell with Trump actually there, probably some would have jumped to his side.
Once inside a concentrated effort to get at the hiding congress members would have been in effect. More cultists getting actually shot by the security actually doing their jobs, but ultimately overwhelmed.
Then ultimately holding the senators members hostage and demanding to be made President for life or else he was going to start executing motherfuckers personally.
The whole time shirtless horned helmet guy would be playing the role as Trump’s “right hand man” and making one liner quips while dragging out the Senators being held hostage.
Some time will pass while Trump goes on about how he’s the savior of America and everyone KNOWS it. At this point at least one Senator (Probably Romney) will speak out against him and promptly get shot, being the first of Congress to get purged.
Hours will pass as the media outside is going fucking nuts and the armed forces are still being “on hold” for some damn reason despite the fact that the Pres has completely lost it. Riots elsewhere in the country get worse and Trump starts making good on his promise and more senators are shot. Mitch probably says something defiantly knowing he’s not long for this world anyway and shirtless horns guy just bashes his head in with a flag stand (Which now has a Trump 2020 flag on it) Trump laughs and pulls his dick out to piss on his corpse.
Ted Cruz and the other Senators that actually STILL supported the election being thrown out, now begin to plead for their lives and say how much they stayed loyal. Completely insane at this point, Trump orders Ted Cruz to suck his dick (still dripping with piss) to prove his loyalty.
Ted Cruz being a complete bitch gets on his knees to do so, but Trump then pushes him away calling him a faggot and shooting him in the head saying the only one allowed to suck his dick is Ivanka.
This is followed by him shouting “YOU HEAR THAT MY LOVELY SEED OF MY LOINS! THIS IS ALL FOR YOU! ALL OF THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN FOR YOU!”
By this time, what remains of the government outside has finally gotten it’s shit together, declared that Trump can no longer be considered a legitimate governmental figure, let alone President and needs to just be put down like a mad dog.
The national guard come in like gang busters, blasting Vanilla ISIS, giving zero fucks about keeping casualties “low.”
In the ensuing fray, the supporters put up a pathetic resistance and mostly start bumping into each other like keystone cops. Trump has already lost his shit, screaming at everyone and everything.
Meanwhile Pence, who had been staying silent the whole time (and unharmed because Trump was claiming a “special” punishment for him) bum rushes Trump and grabs the pistol from him.
A couple of punches are thrown, but Trump is no match for the true Christian Crusader who has found the light of God on his side once again after falling to the darkness of the bad orange man.
“I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING! YOU WERE NOTHING BUT A LOWLY GAY OPPRESSING GOVERNOR BEFORE ME! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN RUNNING LGBTREATMENT CAMPS! YOU WILL NOT BE REDEEMED BY THE MASSES BY STRIKING ME DOWN, YOU WILL NOT GAIN THEIR SUPPORT! YOUR CAREER IS OVER! EVERYONE WILL BE AGAINST YOU!” Trump screams.
Mike looks down at the mad man he once called his president and exhaled heavily.
“With God on my side, who in this world that matters can really be against me?” Mike replies and shoots Trump and then double taps just to be sure.
Mike drops the gun as the National Guard finally make their way to the location. One of them asks where Trump is, not realizing he’s right there with half of his stinking face blown off.
Looking up, Mike says:
“He’s just been impeached.”
Fin.
Epilogue
Mike Pence went back to the simple life of being an Indiana governor that banned gay wedding cakes knowing that this was the work that God intended for him to do.
Shirtless Horns Guy however escaped and still remains at large to this day.
As far as I'm concerned, this is now cannon. ^_^
Apparently there's some other conservative leaning social media called Gab (never heard of it until today) that got shut down as well.
Not sure where all the right wingers are going to go to talk at this point except maybe Stormfront, assuming they didn't have an account there already. Lol
4chan? :p
Well fuck. Let me try again.
You're totally right about this. Some of them came for blood, and stupid mob trials where I'm sure they planned to hang the Hero Mike Pence and Pelosi and so on. But most were probably in it for a lark. I watched one video that was about 35 minutes long, and roughly 70 percent of it was like a carnival. The rest was a violent assault on barricades in an attempt to capture and kill members of the US government, but a large majority of those people were just kind of riding the wave.
However, in the interest of national security, those people — every single one of them — who breached the building should have been greeted with a mouthful of the standard issue 9 mm Luger bullets of the Capitol Police. It's not just about who is more aggrieved. We're talking about defense of the Vice President and both chambers of Congress.
It would have been sad to see such a massacre, but national security is more important than feelings or world views or hundreds of lives of traitors. I wonder how many foreign spies were among them stealing electronic devices.
Actually, I take that back. I think I might be wrong. It only took one death for the crowd at the final barricade to disperse. Maybe just a few shots would have made them back off. But regardless, the Capitol Police were WOEFULLY undermanned.
They certainly should have been PREPARED to massacre them, if they pushed through that final barricade. But maybe it wouldn't have come to that if they had enough people to hold them at bay with tear gas and standard riot control tactics.
I meant to post two shit memes but for whatever reason I deleted him after reformatting. That's okay though he's still hiding in my meme trash bin.
Also, this is probably starting to cross into the realm of bad taste, but:
Fun for all the family!
"Made in the USA"
Looks like they finally got shirtless horned guy.
Also got the one waving as he makes off with the podium.
The Qtards who attacked the Capitol building, however, did so over IMAGINARY crimes, like the non-existent cabal of super secret all powerful Satanist child rapist cannibals, or the "election fraud" that somehow magically never showed up in the legal briefings made by Trump's lawyers and his supporters in the 60+ lawsuits (because a lawyer lying to the press and people is legal, but a lawyer lying to a judge in court would end up in prison for contempt or perjury, or they can get disbarred).
Honestly this is so fucking sad. The right wing extremists would have the moral high ground if they weren't so fucking stupid and gullible. So prone to alternative facts...
So prone to alternative facts...
Long but worth it.
Tehehe. Lake Mini Wanker. ^_^
But surely some of them attacking the US weren't moronic conspiracy theorists, as you imply. Some were likely just right wing reactionaries and confederate twats.
Fuck the police, the government should've sent in Arnie! He barges into congress and declares, "I'm not into politics. I'm into survival." Then he observes the stunned crowd and says, "I eat MAGA hats for breakfast. And right now, I'm very hungry!" He starts shooting. Bullets are flying everywhere. Trump supporters are screaming and running for their lives. "Stop, you can't kill us!" One woman pleads. "If it bleeds, I can kill it." Arnie replies before blowing her brains out. "You are terminated!"
He approaches Warlord Larper and his gang and gives a hearty laugh at their weird costumes. "You're a funny guy," he tells Warlord Larper. "I like you. That's why I'm going to kill you last."
"Now it is time to play a game," Arnie announces. "Who is your president and what does he do?" The guy with the Trump is my President flags charge him, but Arnie just grabs him and impales him on his own flag. "I guess he had to split," he comments. Just then, he sees the guy trying to steal the podium. "Put the podium down!" He cries before snatching the podium from him and bashing his head in it. He then lights a cigar and drops the match onto the remains of the podium theif's mangled skull, setting it on fire. "What a hot head," he mutters to himself.
By now, all the protesters are either dead or have run away. Warlord Larper is cowering in the corner, pissing himself. Arnie walks up to him slowly. "You know how I said I would kill you last?" He asks before grabbing him by the throat and lifting him off the ground. "I lied." And then he drops Warlord Larper out of the nearest window. "Hasta la vista, baby." ^_^
Then he grabs a man who stole documents from Pelosi's desk and says:
The glass is his face, of course.
Are we allowed to retcon real life? I think this is a much better alternative.
I am disappointed in myself for not using any Batman and Robin quotes, but I could not logically come up with a way for the protesters to be frozen to death. :(
There's probably a giant freezer somewhere in Washington where they impale all the healthcare bills on meat hooks and leave them to suffer.
Yey! Now I can use "Cool party", "Allow me to break the ice" and “Here’s your Sub-Zero… now plain zero.” ^_^
And goes home in a chopper. ^_^
Lol. watching the video now. This stuff is amazing! I mean, it really makes you seriously question the psychology behind the conspiracy theorists brain. Like, do they genuinely belive the conspiracy theories that they come up with, or do they just say they do because they're looking for a cause to get behind and really don't care what it is. Like, seriously, is it possible that these people genuinely believe that the California fires were fake because "Oh look, there's a tree over there that didn't get burned down!"
I just... I can't get my head around it. It's like... I don't think that they actually believe the stuff they believe in, but they somehow convince themselves that they do believe it. Kind of like other-kin. I don't think that the people genuinely believe that they are really a fictional antropamorphic fox trapped in the body of a human, but they know that the "belief" exists and they want to be a wolf because "OMG wolves are so cool!" so they just say that they believe in it because then they get to run around with fake fur ears and a tail shoved up their butt and pretend that it's because they genuinely have the soul of a wolf and not because they're really weird.
The weird thing is that believing in these theories doesn't actually help them or improve their lives at all. I think they just... Believe stuff because they like believing in stuff. And they genuinely don't care what the stuff that they believe is. Infact, it seems like the weirder and less believable the stuff that they want to believe is, the more they want to believe it because... ... ... I really don't fucking know! Maybe because it makes them think they're smarter than other people? Like. "Ha, look at all these idiots who think that air exists! What a bunch of gullible morons. I'm so much smarter than them."
I really would like to see an interview with an ex conspiracy theorist to understand the mind set of why the hell a person would invest so much time and energy into convincing themselves that they believe something that they know isn't actually true. :p
Trump's reaction to them is the best bit though. "I don't know much about the movement but I understand that they like me very much... So these are good people who love our country." ^_^
I always get a chuckle out of a smart person actually reading what these morons believe. It's like when you watch a kid open a Chirstmas present. You feel the ego boost of knowing you're way smarter than the common Qtard all over again, experiencing it vicariously through the new person who actually reads their shit.
I only recently became aware that the QAnon guys think that all of Trump's spelling mistakes on twitter are because he's trying to send them some genius secret subliminal message and not because he's a fucking idiot. It's beautiful. ^_^
This gem appeared in my FB news feed today:
I'm really not sure what to make of this... On the one hand I want to completely agree with it, but on the other I think it was posted by someone who genuinely thinks this is an issue. And when I think about it some more, I wonder if this was created just to troll the "cryptozoology" crowd?
If so, this Bigfoot/Biden comparison reminds me of a meme I saw making the rounds several years ago promising the upcoming Spring Equinox that year was ALSO going to have a full moon AND a solar eclipse on the same day. All the new-agey types were "Wow, that's so cool!" and entirely dismissive of anyone who dared point out such an event would be impossible.
Step 1: Point out that Trump just got about 74 million votes, indicating that voter turnout was at a record high. Step 2: Point out that the reason Hillary only had 3 million more votes than Trump in 2016 is because everyone on BOTH SIDES hates Hillary. Except militant feminists... and yet she still had 3 million more votes. You could also point out how often Republicans have won the popular vote of late.
I will settle for anything, *anything* not plagiarized at this point. Spelling things correctly is so far away from the world of possibilities that I can't even see it from here.
Awh, interesting! What's been plagiarized? Books or essays? ^_^
What do you mean it doesn't make sense? QAnon are just trying to spread the good word to all you sheeple so that they can save the world from the evil liberal devil worships and their satanic orgies of pizza and pedophilia. What's so hard to understand about that? ^_^
There's a fucking app for fuck's sake. I am pretty sure that Jesus does not work in mysterious apps.
To be fair, can you really fault them for confusing Joe Biden with a blood drinking lizard man?
Great point mizal. Coincidentally you may be surprised to find a few extra thousand dollars in your stocking next Hanuk... Christmas.
Wait just a minute.. You're telling me there's people out there who think that birds are real? LMAO! People be crazy! Look into a seagull's eyes and tell me that's an actual living creature with a soul. >.<
To be fair though, I live in the U.K. so I doubt that many of the robot birds would've made it over here. For all I know, American birds walk around looking like:
... Nothing to see here folks. ^_^
Speaking of nothing to see...
Yey! Everything sorted. ^_^
Thank goodness someone shares my views! I was starting to think that I was the crazy one for thinking that birds don't exist. I mean, it's so obvious that they're spy drones!
Once Trump is back on the throne we can all dig up our gardens and get back to shooting random varmints off our properties and hoarding bullets for... reasons... Oh and of course mething it the fuck up. Yee Yee!
Texas Rep. Vincente Gonzalez of McAllen also weighed in about Trump's visit. "This is a time for good South Texas American pride to beam into our communities and to not allow ourselves to be used like an old rag by a modern day traitor," Gonzalez said. Gonzalez added that Texans should not be deceived about President Trump's motive for the trip. "Don't be fooled: President Trump does not care about the people of South Texas, this country, or the rule of law," Gonzalez added. "This individual fomented an attack on the United States Capitol and American democracy."
Community activist group, La Union del Pueblo Entero (LUPE) sounded off, mobilizing a petition to cancel Trump's visit. "Border communities rightly see his trip as an immediate threat to community safety and security," LUPE's Facebook post stated.
I'm guessing that Trump is expecting a massive crowd of supporters formed entirely of this guy:
Well, Trump has been impeached. AGAIN.
Youtube has banned him for a week.
The Deutsche Bank has cut ties with him.
New York also cut ties with him.
Yeah he's fucked.
Can't believe the libs managed to fit him in a peach.
I guess he lost weight, good for him!
And myspace! >.<
Wait... Trump has a youtube channel? How the fuck was I not informed? O.O
I'm a little upset still because in the other thread (which I can't find now) I specifically remember telling the US not to self destruct in an orgy of violence. Should've listened, hmm?
But really truly wishing you all the best in getting through the inauguration. Sort of funny that it was the alt right that wound up being the ones to go and try this after all. I've been having to listen to the blood-soaked Congress killing fantasies of all the little college kids for almost a decade, I guess the boomers were right and they're just lazy; if you want to be Thanos, you have to stop explaining that the moral solution would have been indiscriminately killing people only above a certain income, and just go do it yourself.
His mother Lisa Eisenhart, who said she drove with her son from Tennessee, was quoted as saying: “The left has everything: the media, organisations, the government. We have to organise if we’re going to fight back and be heard.” Ms Eisenhart, who works as a nurse, also said: “I’d rather die as a 57-year-old woman than live under oppression.” She added, “This country was founded on revolution. If they’re going to take every legitimate means from us, and we can’t even express ourselves on the internet, we won’t even be able to speak freely, what is America for?”
I vote for tacticool ninja's mom. ^_^
Beautiful! I do love how she's so shocked and horrified that she got maced for trying to illegally break into a building. ^_^
Owh! New Warlord Larper one ^_^
Nice to see that Trump didn't bother to pardon any of the rioters from the riot that he personally incited. ^_^
Yey! I was thinking the libs had been suspiciously quite for awhile. Nice to see they're not going to let the Trump supporters outdo them. ^_^
I'll get my FBI agent on this right away! He's a pretty cool dude, putting up with all my shenanigans!
Well, I've had 4 solid years of fun making fun of Donald Trump and his shenanigans... Then I found this:
The President of the United States, everybody! ^_^
