Welcome. Please leave your shoes at the front door, we wouldn't want you to miss the agonising pain now, would we? Room service is available as well, to order, just shout out what you want into the sky, they'll hear you. They will hear and obey. The cleaners come at 3am, don't leave anything you own, including yourself, in your room or else IT WILL NO LONGER BELONG TO YOU. Most importantly, have fun! You'll love our not at all dangerous pets and our not at all murderous friends who also live here.
