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Traitorous

11 years ago

TRAITOROUS

 

Betrayed. Traitor. Two very similar words, yet so different. But those two describe you greatly. The Great Wars had decimated the Highlands, destroying the kingdom along with it. That's when you come in. You were betrayed, and labeled a traitor.

Takes place in the medieval time range, but in a fantasy world. You play as David, a captain in the Cliff King's Great War Army. You have been betrayed and thrown in jail by your own brothers, and face execution. Can you escape, and find a way to show, that you are not Traitorous?

 

This is my new game I am working on, and I hope it will turn out okay.  Up above is the description, and I just wanted to ask to see if you all have suggestions.  If you need more info, just PM me, and I can give it to you.

Traitorous

11 years ago

Hmm...in my humble opinion, it sounds a bit cliche.

Traitorous

11 years ago

Well, I'm intrigued. ^_^

Traitorous

11 years ago

I like the premise. It sounds like a good opportunity to make a game that will keep the player constantly on their toes.

Traitorous

11 years ago

I'm actually really excited for this game...  It's definitely going to be different than the other "betrayal" games.

(Okay, I deleted what I wrote previously, so I'm not giving anything away).  smiley

Traitorous

11 years ago

Coming along very well!  I'm surprised to see this much progress.

Traitorous

11 years ago

Good luck! I'll confess that I have a huge addiction to these kinds of revenge and vindication plots, because every single one can play differently depending on the main character. The emotional payoff as the antagonists get their comeuppance is great too.

Looking forward to seeing one in a storygame format; I think it'll be fantastic. :)

Let us know if you need any help with the minutiae of editing.

Traitorous

11 years ago

As the food depraved fox stated, the story does seem a bit cliche. Though that's not to say that you couldn't pull it off. I look forward to seeing what you make of this.

Traitorous

10 years ago

Well... finished writing the first fifty pages, and the location has not changed one bit...  This is going to be a LONG project.  Or maybe it's just because I haven't worked on it for the past week.

Traitorous

10 years ago

Alright, here's a little sneak peek.  I couldn't resist:

 

You shout a battle cry, as you bring down your sword, aimed for the guard's undamaged arm.  He shrieks in terror, right before you cut through his leather sleeves, and into his flesh.  the sword stops abruptly, and he screams in agony, as the weapon is embedded in his arm.  You pull the sword out, before raising the sword again.  You hear the man's pleads of mercy, as you swing down again.  You watch, as the blade buries itself in his arm, and stops at the bone.  The man is in tears now, as he begs for his arm.  His right hand is clawing at the cold stone floor, as blood pours down it, while his left is also bleeding now, but with the bone exposed.

Fighting the urge to be sick, you dislodge the weapon from his arm, before swinging again.  This time, as the blade sinks in, you can hear and feel the bone break, soon drowned out by the scream of the guard.

 

If this is used, what maturity level would it have to be?

Traitorous

10 years ago

Assuming there's no sexual content in the story, I'd give it a 4 or 5.

Alexp's article explains it way better than I can: http://chooseyourstory.com/help/articles/article.aspx?ArticleId=26

--edit--

That being said, kudos on a very nicely written, gory fight scene :)

Traitorous

10 years ago

Ah.  Thanks!

Traitorous

10 years ago

GOT TO... write...  *dies*

Traitorous

10 years ago

*ressurects you as a zombie and chains you to a typewriter*

WRITE

Traitorous

10 years ago

Well... to be honest...  I haven't written ANYTHING in about a week... or two.

Traitorous

10 years ago

Aw... :(

Writer's block? Or just real life getting in the way?

Traitorous

10 years ago

Writer's block... but, look at this!

(well actually, I have no idea how to imbed a video, so...)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcKtcXbjwD4

 

HOLY CRAPOLA!  This actually works!

 

Traitorous

10 years ago

You linked it, not embedded haha. Just right click the video (Actually on the video, not around it) and click 'Get Embed Code'. A little box will come up, just right click the text in the box and then click 'Copy'. Now come back to CYS, enter 'Source', paste the code and post.

Traitorous

10 years ago

Huh... that makes sense.

 

 

Traitorous

10 years ago

Alright!  Great news!  I am back on track and hopefully will overcome every adversity in my way...  I'm watching you writer's block... and I will defeat you with my garbage that I call writing.  (Insert evil face of that dude that has one.. two.. twenty one unique symbols)

Traitorous

10 years ago

Haha, that link was awesome. Bookmarked for future reference.

Good luck! Get that masterpiece garbage written!

Traitorous

10 years ago

On hold until January 1, 2015, due to the CYS story-game contest!

Traitorous

10 years ago

Story-game is back in development!  Decided to focus on this game instead.  A bit bummed I can't complete the game for the contest, but oh well.

Completed first part of the game!

Traitorous

10 years ago

Nice!  I got a title page completed, and on my way for the second portion of the game!

Traitorous

10 years ago

I did a MASS edit for the first portion.  I feel like I am getting quite a bit of progress completed!