Shit, I already did the pot-kettle bit. Pity, this would've been a better place for it.
Edit: Oh fuck it, that was a different thread, let's use it again.
"Hey Kettle, how you doing, man?"
"Pretty good, can't complain. How are you?"
"I'm good, very good. Hey, just being honest here, you're looking black as fucking coal, man."