Ever read a book / watch a movie / play a game, and you find yourself expecting or hoping for a specific ending to the story, but it doesn't happen? What was the story, how do you think it should've ended, and why?
(I swear I didn't think of HISHE before I wrote this, just as I was writing it.)
Galaxy in Flames should have ended with the main character fucking killing Abbadon, canon be damned.
Shiki should have ended with the little girl dying slowly and painfully.
The Hunger Games should've ended with Peeta and Katniss killing each other. Talk about deus ex machina.
The Matrix should have ended at the end of the first movie.
Were the other movies that bad? I haven't watched them exactly beacuse people complained how bad they were.
I only watched the second one. It was really pretty bad. And I hear the third one was worse! XD
Well, I only saw the first one... and I'm not going to watch the rest now!
I couldn't even finish the second one, because it was just sappy, boring fluffed up shit.
The Matrix should have ended during the opening sequence*
I wanted the WC stories to end with something other than death, sex, or TBCLOL.
In Star Wars - Revenge of the Sith, as Anakin was drifting more and more to the Dark Side I was hoping that he would eventually come to the realization that Palpatine was the real threat, and that he and Obi-wan would fight him in some climatic battle. If anyones watched that movie, then you already know how terribly wrong I was.
... How did you watch those garbage movies first?
They were better than the originals. And I wanted to watch them in time-line order.
"They were better than the originals."
You're joking, right?
You are scum. Your family is scum. Your upringing is fundamentally wrong, and if I could spit in your face, I would. You aren't even human, anymore. You're just a subhuman piece of shite. I would call you evil, but you're not even worthy of that extreme. You're more like a mediocre piece of scum. You're a failed abortion, you know that, right?
The first movie was...not really needed. The second was kinda "meh". The third? I enjoyed it, though it could've been better.
I think what you're looking for are belts. They also act as ropes :P
They were better th-- Phwahahahaha! Are you fucking serious?
Maybe he was secretly a jedi spy attempting to run the Sith into the ground as a their faux leader while the rage of the Sith blinded them beyond light detection, but the killings of all the Sith begins drawing Palpatine's subconscious more and more towards the dark side, and seeing all the death and chaos of war turned him into a sociopathic evil darklord?
No. He was always evil. Before he came to power, he killed his Master in his sleep. A perfect villian. I love Palpatine/Darth Sidious.
Maybe that was because his master was secretly raping him, as celibates in uptight religions that control the world tend to do?
Hey, they still let Anakin become a Jedi after the 4-5 times he lashed out angrily at shit. One rapist is hardly a village full of special needs people.
*One rapist who, in this scenario, happens to be a Jedi master.
*A village full of creatures regarded as little more than predatory beasts.
*One jedi master, who, if he continued to rape, would probably conpromise the light-forceness of both himself and the kid.
*"Men, women, and children, killed them all, like animals!"-his own words.
When a Jedi surrounds himself with other lifeforms, he becomes more powerful. Every time the Jedi master raped Palpatine, he was releasing millions of lifeforms into Palpatine's rectum.
Just because he feels remorse for what he did doesn't mean the other Jedi gave a fuck.
They aren't true lifeforms until they hit an egg, otherwise they're just an amoeba that can't survive on its own. They're like zombies that way.
That didn't sound like remorse to me. It seemed more like he was trying to make his chopping spree feel more significant. If it was remorse, he'd be actually moping, like the worthless pussy-ass angstball he is, instead of, y'know, yelling and trying to fix the cow tools.
Pro-choice advocates seem to think they are, as much as a developing fetus, anyway.
If he was having to make it seem more significant, that only strengthens my assertion that nobody gives a fuck about Tuskens.
Well, regardless, even if they are full life forms, which they aren't, he'd do a lot better just standing next to him and leaving them safely tucked away in is bollocks than leaving them to slowly die in a kids asshole.
But that does make him all the more wrathful. I mean, in morality, it's more often than not the thought that counts.
I never said "full" life forms (whatever the fuck that means). I honestly have to disagree. Even though all the sperm would die in Palpatine's ass, during the period of time in which they were in there, Palpatine would be exponentially more powerful than he would if his master was just standing beside him. The flame that burns half as long burns twice as bright.
Do the thoughts of a "worthless pussy-ass angstball" really count, though?
Well, viruses aren't really full life forms, and since sperm can't eat, breathe, or reproduce amongst itself, it isn't really alive either. And whatever great powers of light Palpatine would've attatined for the time being, the child trauma and asspain would've undone it twice over and then some afterward.
A person's a person, no matter how small. Unless they're a fetus.
Viruses aren't life forms at all. Sperm...I don't even know and, to be honest, I fucking hate biology.
Come on, he could shoot lightning out of his hands when he wasn't getting molested, so I don't even want to imagine what he could do after getting braped.
I...can't tell if you're being serious or not. I can't even tell if I'm being serious or not. I'm scared now.
Well, what makes you think that molest-ey, non-testiclized sperm are any more powerful than perfectly contained sperm?
He might as well have to. They're only a few million cells out of the billions it takes to make a significant difference, and a single good bath or dump and he'll lose them all.
Read Darth Plagueis it explains alot.
It isn't actually canon anymore.
What is then?
It's possible for them to hide the essence of the Dark Side. Hence why they can get caught off-guard by a Dark Jedi.
Inheritance shouldn't have a ending that mixed Return of the King with Return of the Jedi. Should have ended with a grand battle scene nope Return of the Jedi.
I think they should've went with the alternate ending to I am Legend.
Hell yeah, not that charging in with a grenade bullshit.
This. It's not the ending to the whole thing, but would have been great.
I can't watch it, since youtube is utterly broken on this piece of garbage, but any ending where the muscle dude kicks more ass is a good one for me, since I know everyone's gonna die at the end anyway.
How I Met Your Mother's ending was terrible. "That's it?" Kept resonating in my head non stop for a week after that.
Mass Effect could've played up the ending a little better as well.
The Infamous games should have used the "infamous" endings as canon. Sort of defeated their own purpose by going with the "good guy" endings. (Along with it just being boring and cliche in general)
If you'd just rip out the last chapter in Stephen King's It, it would be a 100% better read.
He probably just wants to leave the reader wanting more. Of course, what he leaves them is completely dumbfounded, perplexed and in my case - enraged.
Lord of the Flies
Only it was less of a hope and more of a complete expectation that the main character was going to die. It broke my suspension of disbelief badly.
Like in Stephen King's The Stand?
The Deus Ex Machina was crucial to the allegorical part. Showing that humans are all the same, rescuing them from this war fought by boys over bloated trivialities, and sweeping them into the war fought by men for turgid evils. Doesn't mean Ralph/whateverthefuckhisnamewas couldn't have died though, but seriously, that book was hardly written for entertainment.
The Mass Effect trilogy should have ended in some way that made at least some of your decisions count, except for the final one that, unless you are into MP, you cannot even access all the options for.
When I was first playing through it, I expected Fallout 3 to end with the player finding their father, rather than, you know... dying.
I also remember playing through Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life and expecting it to sort of never end like all the other games in the series, but it ended with the player dying of old age. Have to admit, that ending sort of got to me.
The Mass Effect Series.
I've lost count how many times I've ranted on about this to various people, but the ONLY fucking difference between the three endings were the colours of the fucking explosions...for fuck's sake, Bioware.
I have a crapton more shit to say about male Shepard's romance options in ME2, but I'm not going there for now.
Besides all that the series is awesome, and is my second favourite gaming franchise of all time, but god, can they please release another ending so that I (and 99% of the fanbase) can stop pretending the current one never existed at all.
Lol, a exact definition of the Tekken series.
Can't help agreeing, really. M.E. was great ... until you get to that damn ending.
Personally, I'm glad they kept it, because of the fan uproar. I have no respect for an artist that doesn't stay true to their own vision because of fantards.
The ending was okay with the extended version.
I'm still of the mind that the entire series would have been more interesting had they not gone the the whole space opera save the galaxy from Robotic Cthulhus of Doom with Blue & Orange morality coming to wipe everyone out.
And just had Shepard doing a space James Bond routine of destabilizing governments, maintaining order for the federation/earth/whatever, sleeping with a bunch of aliens and generally doing spy type shit.
He could still be saving the galaxy from rogue governments like the Bataarians or organizations like Cerberus.
Space James Bond. I'd play it. (I guess I sort of did, never really thought of Shepard like that before.)
Lol. Popular characters with the added outer-space thing always fail, well, movie-wise anyway (Jason in Space, Dracula 3000, ect).
Leprechaun 4: In Space is the best movie I've ever seen about a Leprechaun in space.
I actually thought Jason X was probably one of the better entries mainly because the only reason to watch those movies in the first place is to see how many people he's going to kill and how inventively and it succeeded in that goal.
Jason himself doesn't really have much in the way of personality and they had done just about everything else with him at that point, so sure why the hell not put him space?
Maybe they should make 'Jason in da Hood'. I'd watch that shit, it worked fine for the Leprechaun.
That's actually a very good idea. Pitch that to someone before the idea is take.
It's been, like, 20 years since the last Jason movie, that would be beating a dead horse at this point.
The Friday the 13th remake was made in 2009. It according to Wikipedia made 91.4 million dollars at the box office. Jason in da Hood would still draw a crowd.
Maybe Jason could go up against the hillbillies from Wrong Turn, or perhaps he could be the protagonist in the next Final Destination and has to thwart death at every turn.
Jason Voorhees as the protagonist of a final destination movie? xD ... Actually, I kind of like that idea.
Come to think of it, Ash vs. Freddy vs. Jason should have been an actual movie....
Hell, there should be a whole double decker bus full of horror movie people fighting to the death The Purge-style in this hypothetical movie.
Should we start organising the teams?
It would probably end up being like Scary Movie (which would be alright, I think we could all use more laughs).
And speaking of Ash...I had to Google it and found out I had missed an entire franchise. Well, it's now added it to my watch list.
No, not Scary Movie, anything but, please! I mean, I wouldn't mind Charlie Sheen playing Ash as a parody, but there's nothing other than random absurdity going for those movies these days. Yeah, they have their parts when they genuinely make fun of things and actually use wit, but there's nothing really that leaves you laughing long after the movie's over.
I only saw the first one, then I figured "if you've seen one, you've seen 'em all." So, I guess we're both in agreement.
"Maybe Jason could go up against the hillbillies from Wrong Turn"
They did have a 3 comic mini-series where Jason encounters Leatherface and his inbred family. It was probably the only story where the writer attempted to make Jason a deeper character since it goes into his thought process of why he's acting the way he does and such.
Jason gets along with them for awhile, since he mildly sees a kindred spirit in Leatherface and Leatherface & his family sort of accept Jason too for awhile since they think he's a good ol' boy similar to them.
It doesn't last when one of Leatherface's brothers starts acting like an asshole and he ends up going back to acting like old fashioned Jason again.
Hadn't heard of that comic, but I Googled it and found out that it didn't fit into the Friday the 13th or The Texas Chainsaw Massacre timeline. I'll keep my eye out for it, though, since I've always been infatuated with both series'.
I don't know how Jason could think at all after Part 4.
Jason in da hood should revitalise him. Nothing better than killing gang bangers and crack whores.
I wonder how he'd fare against Candyman...
Why haven't they had more crossovers? They could do something with several different sci-fi's where Jason has to fight himself, but in a parallel universe. Or they could do one with Groundhog Day, where he gets to kill the same people - day after endless day. Lol.
Yeah the Jason vs. Leatherface comics are from the mid 90s which wasn't really a popular decade for psycho slashers in general so neither of the franchises were really at their peak or being rebooted when it was made. Probably was just created because they happened to have the license to play around with or something and there was always the rumor going around even back then that there was going to be a Freddy vs. Jason movie coming out. (Well, they eventually made that one true)
There are probably like 3 or 4 different timelines for the Texas Chainsaw Massacre storyline anyway given how many times they've rebooted it.
They actually have a little editorial at the end of the series with the writer who said when she got the job to write the comic, she didn't have much trouble writing Leatherface and his family since she'd grown up around violent hillbillies in real life who were only slightly better. Plus it's easier to write characters that actually have interaction with each other even if Leatherface isn't much of a talker.
But when it came to Jason, it was difficult since you can get away with a solitary silent masked boogyman on screen, but it can get boring with panel after panel of silence. So she asked if she could try to expand his character a little and they told her "Do whatever the hell you want with him." so she did.
The reason they haven't had more corssovers is probably because people would start realising that most of them have no real personality unless they're killing shit.
I still say they should have a fighting game with all the various psycho slashers and it could be made by the Mortal Kombat guys.
So Lord Darkness vs. Dr. Frank N Furter?
I would play that! As long as I didn't get stuck being Norman Bates (he's probably the tamest of all the psycho's and slasher's)...
"I want my stimpacks shaken this time, not stirred."
Haha, seriously. The Asari were obviously worth more than the humans, but we sort of just buttfucked Thessia.
"we sort of just buttfucked Thessia."
Seems legit, considering my Shepard was doing that to Liara on a personal level anyway.
As far as I can remember, the suicide mission build-up was for the entire galaxy, not just Earth, since the Reapers were going to annihilate all forms of advanced organic beings.
Except any who did not possess space travel, which ... pretty sure they all do now, so... yeah.
The Reapers had the ability to travel faster than all forms of life through the Mas Relays (according to the Codex). All space-faring species relied on the Mass Relays to travel any further than their own solar system ('least humans), and considering the Reapers actually had the ability to leave the galaxy and float mid-universe, I'd say the species were pretty screwed. Unless... I'm missing something? Also, half the homeworlds were destroyed and the Batarians were nearly wiped out so that proves more than Humanity is at stake.
I'm not arguing with you. I'm saying that--if I recall correctly--in the past, they only wiped out all organic life that had space travel. If they had wiped out all life before, this story would've have happened. :P
Oh yeah, just reread the question. Sorry 'bout my misunderstanding. Although, I still don't get why Killa said that Earth was the only thing about to get wiped by the Reapers.
It had to do with how the Asari homeworld got screwed over, I guess...?
Unless I'm being a total inbred, that's a self-defeating point Killa made. But uhh... Eh, oh well. Have a g'day, Kiel.
*shrug* I dunno, you'd have to ask him. Same to you, dude.
Here's a movie probably nobody has seen, but I'm going to tell everyone how it should have ended anyway because it was a TV movie that came on the scifi channel so I'm not really spoiling shit.
Dungeons & Dragons 3: The Book of Vile Darkness
Okay, already I know what everyone is thinking. The first D&D movie sucked more than coins' mom on a friday night so why in the hell would you ever watch the sequels, let alone one that comes on the scifi channel?
Well obviously because it was free entertainment at the time, I didn't have anything important to do and I'd already tortured myself by watching the first two movies.
Now the odd thing is, the D&D movies actually get better with each sequel. It's like they actually make more of an effort with less money in the budget. The third one is tolerable mainly because it does one major thing different that you never see in any fantasy based film:
It focuses on a completely evil party and their quest. Seriously they need more fantasy movies with that premise.
Basically they have to go get the Book of Vile Darkness for their master to summon some unspeakable horror into the world. They all get along about as much as a group of evil people would. Common goal mixed with their own long term ambitions to keep them from backstabbing each other during the quest.
Now there IS one "good guy" in the group who is acting undercover to foil their plot, but he ends up getting corrupted along the way and he's actually the main one going around backstabbing people (although he's supposed to be good, so I suppose it isn't technically backstabbing) anyway he fucks up majorly, he ends up compromising his beliefs, fucks the evil chick in the group, lets the villains get the book, gets himself captured and ultimately gets set up to be put the sacrificial slab when they find out who the hell he is.
He gets sacrificed, the evil overlord summons the eldritch horror and brings death and destruction to the world. The end.
Unfortunately THAT doesn't happen.
Instead, the cliche thing happens. The evil chick he fucked gets a soft spot for him at the end and releases him and he manages to kill the evil overlord with the only weapon that can kill him or something and he saves the world. Which is a total cop out. To be fair though, he doesn't get the evil girl, she just releases him and goes on her way saying that the next time they meet it won't be on friendly terms.
This wasn't some perseverance of good always triumphing over evil tale either, because the guy completely fucked up and ONLY got out of his predicament due to sexing up the half succubus earlier in the movie.
The only "moral" that could be learned is never underestimate the power of your dick to get you out of trouble. Which come to think of it, might be an important lesson to learn after all.
Anyway I liked the Vermin Lord wizard, he was hamming it up the entire time and he lets a little undead girl suck on his finger. (Actually she sucks on a couple of the party members' fingers)
The mind flayer overlord was dumb though, he didn't look anything like a mind flayer. It couldn't have been that expensive to just glue some plastic tentacles to the actor's face.
Didn't even know there were D&D movies. Do you recommend even though you said they suck arse?
Only the third one is tolerable for the reasons mentioned. It helps that it also isn't really connected to the other two other than the name.
The second one is pretty forgettable and just dull. It's very loosely connected to the first one due to it having one of the same villains, but other than that it's not connected at all which is a good thing because the first one sucks very badly. Don't see that one at all.
Might give the third one a look.
But it's got Jeremy irons in face paint at a 65 degree angle shouting "now is the hour of your doom!"
that and time machine, did Jeremy owe someone money?
Not even Jeremy Irons could save the D&D movie. It was just bad all over. They put in a fucking beholder and it doesn't even death ray anyone. Hell, the mini-beholder in Big Trouble in Little China was cooler.
I didn't think Time Machine was awful, but it was just sort of bland and Jeremy was probably the biggest highlight of it with his uber psychic Morlock character.
I've heard they were funny bad, but then again, I might be thinking of a fan parody.
How to fix the mind flayer problem:
>Get some kid with a computer.
>Use shitty cartoons or CGI. Seriously, windows moviemaker, claymation, ANYTHING.
I mean, come on, it's not like everyone was taking you seriously the first two times, and even fucking Dragonlance wasn't too good to stoop down to using really shitty 3d animations, but then again, it was an animated movie, so that didn't actually matter, but hey, you're already on the goddamn sifi channel, if you're still taking yourself seriously at that point then you should probably head to the clinic to get your ego checked.
At-least I'm not the only one who things the Sci-Fi (with an edgy, idiotic twist on the title making it 'Sy-Fy') channel has worse taste than a rat during the zombie apocalypse.