Dealing with this shit:
Have fun.
Nah I killed it already I'm just WIDE AWAKE now so I'm sure I'll be miserable and dragging around work tomorrow.
The really fun part was hearing the rattle when I was walking toward the kitchen barefoot in the dark for a drink of water.
If you ignore it, maybe it will go away.
...except, then you will have no idea where it is, which is arguably worse. Good luck. Would you like to borrow a flamethrower?
On a more serious note, wear rain boots or something when dealing with snakes to keep yourself from being bitten.
--edit--
Or kill it, yeah...OMG mizal, you're a badass, just casually offing rattlesnakes at ungodly hours of the night O_o
lol yes besides turning on the light you can bet putting on some shoes was the first thing I did. It very helpfully waited for me to do that and then throw the cats outside to keep them from investigating what that cool wiggly thing making that noise was.
Mostly I'm just glad I found it when I did, I would NOT want a rattlesnake in stealth mode under the furniture somewhere. Plus this is my grandfather's house and seeing as he's almost 90 it would have been a very bad thing if he'd come across it, he definitely wouldn't have been able to hear it.
That's certainly one way to look on the bright side.
Out of morbid curiosity, what did you kill it with?
How did you even manage to kill a rattlesnake with scissors?
I pinned it down with the edge of a dustpan so it couldn't twist it's head around and then scissored it from behind.
If it had been a full sized snake it would've been a lot more of a problem...I guess I could have gone out in the garage for a garden hoe, but I'd have been afraid of missing and pissing him off. D:
Ah. Makes sense. If I have one of these in my house, guess I'll dig out my old medical reference book and drop it on the little bastard. I usually only see scorpions in this house, though. Lots of scorpions. >_>
Wow, nice catch(slash kill)! I don't think I've ever seen a baby snake like that, he's quite cute if you discount the dead guts part.
So RPS does come in handy in real life. Scissors beats Snake.
NxD oman is that a rattlesnake?
Yes, and good thing because I would've had no idea it was there if I hadn't heard it when I walked by.
A pretty young one but they're dangerous at that age too. I have a better picture where you can see the little rattle, but his head is kind of detached from his body in that one and I don't know who here would be a little babby about that. (james)
Huh. Is rattle snakes a common occurrence in your area?
But thatbwoud be hilarious
It's unusual to see them this early in the year and even more so in the freaking house, but there's a few different kinds around. In this area there's also copperheads, coral snakes, and cottonmouths can pop up anywhere near the river or creek. Those are all worse, honestly, since they don't come with the built in alarm system.
It's just something you always stay aware of if you're working outside anywhere overgrown or with places they could hide. In the summer, especially when it's been really dry they can cause problems because they're attracted to water bowls for pets.
The non-poisonous ones are fun. You can grab 'em behind the head and scare kids with 'em. Granted, you can do that with the poisonous ones too, but you're far more likely to end up in a hospital, mental or otherwise.
Shit. Someone brings a snake into class, and I go all Steve Irwin on the poor bastard.
We used to have a cool chickensnake that would come into the garage and just hang out. He was around 4 ft long I think? I named him Fred. :)
I had such a great picture of him stretched across the backs of the washer and dryer, he was exactly the length of both of them put together, nose to tail. Lost it when my old computer died though.
He liked to scare the crap out of everyone by getting up inside the water softener machine, then just sort of popping out to say hi whenever anyone went to refill it.
You live in Texas, don't you?
Yep. We don't take any crap from snakes around these here parts, y'all.
Glad you didn't get bit and love the smiley!
You have way too much fun gouging at my sensitivity. Go ahead.
No no James, I respect your dedication to your kinship with all the little critters of the world, even when it comes at the cost of the ability to relate to your own species. :) And plenty of even otherwise normal people can get really squeamish sometimes at the sight of anything dead (while happily horking down a hamburger...) so I wouldn't just drop something in the thread like that without a warning.
For instance, if the sight of a dead thing or a little blood alarms you, you should definitely not click on this picture, which might be that little snake's big brother that we found on the patio last year.
Hail Mizal, always scissoring animals in the dark.
A good way of dealing with terrifying snake monsters coming into your house is moving somewhere without terrifying snake monsters.
Are you, uhh...going to eat that?
Don't see why she wouldn't. Rattlesnake tastes like chicken.
I'd love to get that snake, and eat it. No, not just eat it, but suck the flesh off the bones, swish 'em around and savor the experience.
... You were less creepy when you were Ford.
Anyone else think this guy's going to end up slowly killing and eating members of this site?
That would be a cool story.
He would make for a interesting enemy, a giant floating mouth sucking the meat off other living creatures...
Oh heeeeeEEEeEEEeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeEeeEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLL
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Welcome to Australia! That is what we like to call a "silent alarm". :P
Instead we have brown snakes! Which can be brown, but also can be speckled, beige, black, silver, yellow, black and grey! Whenever we see a snake, it could actually be a brown snake! It could actually be the second most venomous snake in the world! Fuck that, we have what's called an inland taipan - that one's the most venomous snake in the world. Fuck Australia. But hey, I do love the smol non-venomous ones, they're cute :3
I'll see if Africa can mail me a mongoose.
Mongeese? Mongooses?
Well any ways, (insert proper name here), are bad*sses. They can beat up like five king cobras in a minute,
Umm...you're thinking cockroaches.
..Why do you have a rattlesnake inside your house?
They like warmth and they can fit through small spaces.
They should know better than to enter the territory of terrifying humans. Bosses of the top food chain. Rattlesnakes, utter fools.
This makes me glad i live in maine, no poisonous snakes or spiders. (besides daddy long legs)
Yeah, but daddy long legs are only harmful to small insects. But you probably already know that.
Oh, and poisonous isn't the correct term. Venomous is.
Auto correct is being stubborn at the moment...
It always is. :/
Yep. Auto correct is a b***h.
So did you eat him or make his skin into a condom?
Snake skin condoms? >_>
Careful of not dripping any poison on the skin.
Yes, for those who think sheepskin is too soft.
I always thought it was wrong to call it "sheepskin", since it is technically made from a sheep's intestine.
...
Doesn't that mean wearing sheepskin is like butt fucking a sheep?
... Oh, God, I never thought of it that way before.
Remember, kids, screwing animals is wrong, but killing them in their infancy and wrapping their guts around your winkie is cool.
Urgh...
God, Kiel, if we're going to be gay lovers, you can't be so squeemish.
Umm...sorry.
O...kay.
... Way to take a load off my mind, Quills.
No, no, doin' Foxes, that's sexy. But screwing sheep? That's just wrong
xD It's fine, I'm not actually that squicked out, and I get over gross stuff pretty quick. Still weird, though.
Make a necklace out of his bones.
Yeah, that way her trophy craftsmanship will be superb by the time she moves on to people.
Then she can make necklaces out of babies fetus skulls with no problems.
You mean before of after the abortionist purees the brain?
A mix of both sounds about right.
Or, yanno, do the sane thing and not resort to dead human body parts.
I didn't want to kill the joke, but I was wondering when someone was going to bring that up. One of my little siblings had a horrible soft spot as a baby.
With 6 Billion people in the world, 1.5 Billion of which have notable psychological problems, killing people to make jewelry is the sane thing to do.
Superglue.
Now, the serperate bones are all mixed with the bones of other skulls! Best art ever.
Well James I can't say I've ever thought of turning a snakeskin into a condom but I'll definitely be adding that one to my bucket list. Should be a good conversation piece at parties.
Seeing how it was 2am I just sort of threw it over the fence into the pasture, where I imagine it was rapidly devoured by fire ants.
BTW kids just and fyi if you ever find yourself with a recently dead snake on your hands, they keep moving for quite awhile after they die and even afterwards are still capable of poisoning you if you get snagged by the fangs, so you want to take all the same basic precautions you would with a zombie.
Yeah, you can actually cut their head clean off and still get bitten.
So you can still use them to pull out paperclips in their death throes?
I've been keeping these little bastards alive for no reason! I could've eaten them sooner!
They can move pretty fast. One second after throwing something it, it would be upon you.
Sounds terrifying.
So, what happen after you threw the shovel?
So it just took it while you were throwing things at it? It didn't try to slowly creep forward?
It was evaluating your threat level, before attacking for real. You were lucky that your ex got home before the snake decided that you're weren't much of a threat.
I've never seen a water moccasin that big, thankfully, but they can be really aggressive. Definitely not a snake where the whole 'only attacks when cornered' thing applies. Would've been a situation for busting out the shotgun if that were me. Or at least in keeping ahold of that shovel. :P
I am having a stressful night.
While I am a vegetarian, I suggest you cook and eat it.
I second this notion.
I remember this thread!
But good luck, you should really find out how it got there :(
This one wasn't inside at least, but it was on the patio a couple feet from the door, in the dark, and kept me trapped outside awhile trying to work up the nerve to get past it. Then I seized my weapons and went back out to do battle. (once I rigged a decent lighting solution since the patio light wiring is shot and having one hand occupied holding a flashlight was not really ideal...)
It was pretty intense actually, he was pissed and striking at the garden hoe, and all mixed up in some plant pots so it took forever to actually get at a good angle to pin him down.
Whoever says snakes will flee unless cornered is a fucking liar btw.
I admire your bravery. A lot.
Rip snek
Died trying to avenge his bruddah
2016-2016
This is why i live in New Zealand. So i don't have to deal with this shit. The worst we get are spiders. Fucking spiders everywhere...
Maybe you could just turn killing snakes into a career. From what I've seen, you're very capable.
Moose.
Mice?
Meese.
I've only ever seen one moose in Ottawa, and the stupidity people displayed was astounding. He was chilling in some guy's field maybe twenty feet away from the road and a bunch of idiots were taking photos of him from the other side of the fence. I was hoping one of them would be gored; at least then they might show a bit of fucking respect to an animal that could easily roflstomp them.
Great! Now you can make the left boot. :P
Feed him to your cats. Give them some extra protein.
Saving this image.
Dude, I don't like to kink shame, but you're into some weird shit.
Ok, I don't know why I haven't responded to this yet, but now that I remembered it: Just 'cuz I'm interested in something doesn't mean it's my fetish. That's like asking a mechanic if he gets off on car engines. I'm not even that into vore.
It was a joke.
Not anymore it's not. (... Also curious how a decapitated snake can be considered "vore.")
Ever seen the Vorn where the person who got ate gets out?
Sad Snek :<
I missed this last night, but wow. I would probably...not be able to kill it XD
DAAAAAMN! What kind of snake is this one?
Diamondback, about 3 ft long.
They get bigger.
Just get a leafblower and some firecrackers.
Or some sort of flammable spray and a lighter.
That also works.
That would probably be my weapon of choice. Mostly because I'm a pyromaniac and I'd like an excuse to burn something to death.
I like throwing mechanical objects containing lit, explosive objects in them and then watching it explode.
I like casting flames and watch as the targets writhe and eventually become ash.
A dork face?! Oh my god! She's getting really good at these insults!
Whoa. That's definitely bigger than anything I've ever had to deal with.
Holy fuck. You're like a snake magnet.
You should
Mizal is fighting more giant snakes than Conan
Didn't he only run into one of them? I've only ever read the story where he fights pirates, so I don't know, but isn't the giant snake (Or one of the giant snakes, at any rate) the god of the lizard people, rather than a common adversary?
I think that was Malk’s point, Mizal’s already killed more giant snakes than Conan, because Conan only killed one. Or at least he did in the movies.
Yeah, but Conan's track record with giant snakes is pretty low, in that case. I mean, the comparison is factually true, but Conan's not exactly a pro giant snake killer.
I'll buy your house.
You lying like shit. You know damned well yo ass ain't kill no rattlesnake lol. Trying to get clout points and shit. And with scissors? Yeah ard
I mean, there's pics of decapitated snakes next to gardening tools and shit. Someone must have killed them, and we already know Mizal is a misanthropic hermit, so it must have been her who decapitated these snakes.
And, I mean, you'd be surprised what you can do with scissors if you can get things to hold still (I.E. Pin its head under a dustpan)
I don't know. I might be wrong. I live in the city. Only snakes I got to worry about exist in human form. So they ten times more dangerous
If you live out in the country, killing animals that get into places you don't want is a thing that happens all the time.
Groundhogs, for instance. They're fucked up.
Yeah, though Mizal's of the theory that he's probably just some white suburbanite kid sitting safely behind his keyboard talking "gangsta" in an effort to be tough.
Resourceful! ^-^ teach me senpai
