Forums » The Lounge » Read Thread

Your story was graded with exactly the same standards and amount of criticism as any other story on the site. People don't give good ratings to stories that are less than 500 words with little story to speak of and some random song lyrics thrown in. As for comments, "trial by fire" is kinda how things work around here. Usually it's constructive criticism masked in a slew of insults because it makes people laugh. This is a place for writers to hone their skills and readers to find good and engaging stories (which are the ones that survive.) If you're using it for a school project, I would suggest you take the advice I gave you in my "nasty" comment.

Your very first comment, from Leora: I would recommend leaving school projects unpublished in sneak preview for your teacher to see. Published works will be held to the same standards as everything else on this site. Whoa that sure is mean and nasty! But it's also telling you exactly what should've been done so that you could show the "story" to your teacher and classmates (and be given the failing grade you deserve) and telling you exactly what would happen if you left it public. My comment was simply the truth: you ARE lazy and your teacher SHOULD fail you, also only 100 words of the "story" were yours in the first place. The rest was a plagiarized Disney song you worthless, disgusting child.

Banned? Ouch. Anyway, the story's gone, so here's my comment that I had put on it, in case you didn't get to see it: This was about the holocaust? Says who? It is simply because there were bullets and there were also bullets during the holocaust? My experience with this game went like this: I’m starting out with no context at all. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know why I’m there. But I’m helping some guy named Vlad, and his general tells him to shoot at Germans. I have a choice to “dig deeper” or “shoot or not shoot.” This really doesn’t make any sense at all. Am I in a trench? Do I have a shovel or a gun in my hand? And if I do have a gun, why would I choose to not shoot when a general is standing over me telling me to shoot? I don’t think I have a shovel, so I select the second option. The second option takes me to a second page with no text at all on it. Why is this here? There is no reason for this page at all. Instead, if I was supposed to choose to shoot or not shoot, I could have had those options on the previous page. This is already very confusing and annoying. Since I have absolutely no reason in the world NOT to shoot and I have a general yelling at me to shoot, it seems likely I’m in a battle and if I don’t shoot my general will kill me. Therefore I choose to shoot. This takes me to a page that appears to indicate that I did indeed shoot because I can hear bullets. I’m not sure how I can hear bullets over the sound of my gun shooting, but whatever. But now it’s back to the shovel, asking me if I dug a hole. I have no option here, so again, this page is utterly useless. I select the option so that I can hopefully reach the end of this soon. This takes me to a page with a sentence fragment. And I am “ded.” Did I shoot myself? Did the shovel hit me in the head? What the hell happened? I did what my general asked me to do. I have absolutely no clue what’s going on at all in this story, and you’re claiming this is about the holocaust? No. No it is not. It is a few words slapped together, almost appearing to be randomly slapped together. It doesn’t make any sense, it follows no logic, and it’s just bad. In fact, this review I’m writing actually has more words in it than your entire story and probably has more logic and thought in it as well. If you would like to write stories, great. If you want help writing stories, even better. But don’t write a story and then run around claiming that you’re the best in the world because you put a few words on a web site. If you do want to get better at writing, first read. If you want to get better at CYS stories, read this site – a lot. Read what others have written. Read the forums. Read what people like and do not like. And read the comments to what you write. I’m not saying believe every word of every comment, but when you find a lot of people writing the same thing about your writing, there just might be a bit of truth in what you’re reading.

Banned for plagiarism and probably trolling. And for spending 4X as long whining as writing. Although I imagine his response to your comment would be the same to the others who tried to help: I only did this for school I don’t care about your comments of hate. Just because all of you want real fun storylines and things to just have fun. That doesn’t mean other people can use CYS for other things besides story games. Like come on. You are the reason people say don’t read the comment section. I've saved the entire transcript of the story (didn't exactly take long) and will probably put it up in Interesting Comments along with the comments themselves once I have a chance to format it. All of us wrote way more in response to the story than the author wrote in the story itself.

:)

It's been a matter of some minor discussion so I'm just wondering what the opinions of the users who matter is on situations like these.* When a kid like this pops up, would you prefer they be allowed to tard around while you all throw rotten vegetables, or simply be removed? I know threads like this used to be a major source of entertainment in the Lounge in the past, but the environment has changed somewhat and we're more about writing and less screwing around (outside the Discord) now. It also seems to me, if this matters at all (probably not) that it's much kinder to the short bus child in question to just immediately kick them off a site they're clearly unsuited for than to let them wander among the wolves with a steak tied around their necks. Then again, maybe that's just solid entertainment, a learning experience and a team-building exercise all at once and I should just let nature take its course. *Your opinions will be, as always, disregarded completely if that suits the admins. Democracy is a failed system.